Heartland

Head-turner chick, probably CDE social level, engaged in the street by personable, educated and presentable gent pulling down serious cash and able to refer knowledgeably to things like films and books and stuff. Unburdened by a micropecker too, you may assume. Questions: 1. Ought she to feel flatte...

? A season ticket on the tube?

Yes. This amused me too. The wife tracker fortunately is not that specific in its locating. So the changing rooms would be ok. But, for the record, whilst I do not wear many (perhaps any) of her clothes, she, like most females, views my wardrobe as an extension of hers and will happily root around f...

http://www.mapamobile.com/

Note to self:

only entertain mistresses in (a) office, (b) tube or (c) Selfridge's lady's dept changing rooms.

If choosing c don't forget to buy token gift for mrs tc to cover tracks.

Purple Light wrote: I'm gonna write to them again tomorrow now. I want a reply!

Who do you think "them" is?

It's just l'il old AE taking a break from playing championship manager or looking up long words in the dictionary.

You will not fail.

A conclusion which which Mrs TC also drew.

The picture of Billy Idol brings to mind the bedroom mirror, Mony Mony, an air guitar, my double tape deck, and a comment the other evening from Mrs TC. "What is air guitar and why is it important to men?" she asked. This is what my brain did: 1. Opened mouth as if to commence answer 2. In...

Because it leaves an acrid tang of tristam self-love in the mouth. Which is so very sixth form.

I would take the bone. You can't teach an old dog new trix.

On small haven in the cowpat that otherwise spreads from north of Nottingham to the Scottish Borders.

The wild mushroom risotto is especially good.

So how often do you do it?

And r u a myla bone, mojo or pebble girl?

http://www.myla.com/ProductGroups.aspx? ... ECNUM=1651

Having lived and worked there in a professional capacity, my professional view is that Moscow is a dump. Propaganda is probably still the most bearable evening establishment to frequent if you would like a relatively clean evening out with lots of pretty Russian girls who aren't too obviously intere...

Sad to hear the news of the death of the BBC Cameraman and critical injury of their correspondent. That said, why are the BBC like this about BBC issues. Barely a week goes by without a MASSIVE obit for someone marginally involved in the BBC. And when a cameraman and correspondent are shot at, the i...

If you fill a jar with a bean each time you have sex in the first year of your relationship, and then a new jar each time you have sex after the first year, at the end of it all the jars will have the same numbers of beans.

Don't feel so sure now, do we?

Where does it end? Cheerful bugger, aren't we? Are you trying to bring Whitby to Heartland? You should be worried Pudsey. There are four attributes every man should have. I have all 4. If I'm not happy, what hope is there for the rest of you? 1. Flat stomach 2. Hair 3. Intellect 4. Earning power Yo...

markfiend wrote:What were you trying to text when you sent "anol"? Or should I not ask?

pump

Another week goes by. You are older. Tired like last Friday. Jubilant because the sun's out. Looking forward to the weekend. Aware that the weekend is a blip. You make enough money. Your life isn't changing. You're moving forward, but only because the conveyor belt is moving forward. You wonder whe...

Another week goes by. You are older. Tired like last Friday. Jubilant because the sun's out. Looking forward to the weekend. Aware that the weekend is a blip. You make enough money. Your life isn't changing. You're moving forward, but only because the conveyor belt is moving forward. You wonder whe...

Another week goes by. You are older. Tired like last Friday. Jubilant because the sun's out. Looking forward to the weekend. Aware that the weekend is a blip. You make enough money. Your life isn't changing. You're moving forward, but only because the conveyor belt is moving forward. You wonder wher...

St George was not English, never lived there, and all he did was possibly kill a dragon in what is possibly now Turkey.

Fvcking irrelevant.

THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.

Complete about face AND failure to judge the prevailing mood of the fellow heartlanders.

Time to take up politics.

I may be wrong Don't show any weakness. Sack Ron is such an easy bandwagon to jump on. And very Esther Rantzen . Consider. Last night Big Ron called a black guy a [whoops, i did a racism] and later apologised. Big deal. Did anyone get hurt? Did anyone die? Yesterday some Al Quaeda guys blew up a bu...

I think Ron was a gift to the genre of commentary. A linguistic innovator in a room full of cardboard cut-outs. But he said he didn't even realise he'd said it. Talk about inveterate. He had to go.

Probably for a crafty massage at the boxing club.

wrong. wrong. wrong. f-ing incompetent cnt.