The Consequence of Subterfuge

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Many times in my life have I been confronted with a plate full of unassuming, succulent chocolate cookies, and each time they have silently begged me to partake of their spotty molten goodness.

I am too much the lady not to oblige. I select my fare carefully, choosing only the most worthy biscuit, teasing them with my fickle nature as they do me with their sweet enticements. We dance, I lead; at last, eager with anticipation, I pluck the lucky winner from the plate and take a bite...

...only to find that the cookie is an imposter. Raisins masquerading as chocolate chips! Oatmeal disguised as the other non-chocolate parts of a chocolate chip cookie!

The subterfuge of those wrinkley little ex-grapes offends me. I do not see the point of cookies without chocolate in them.

I shall have my revenge.
User avatar
Big Si
School Bully
Posts: 6747
Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

CorpPunk wrote:I am too much the lady.......
:lol: ;D :roll:
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
User avatar
hallucienate
Overbomber
Posts: 4602
Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
Contact:

...but you still ate them anyway?
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Yes. I had two, the fiends! :cry:
User avatar
emilystrange
Above the Chemist
Posts: 9031
Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.

i dont see the point of raisins.
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
User avatar
Brideoffrankenstein
Overbomber
Posts: 2883
Joined: 15 Jan 2004, 01:51

CorpPunk wrote:Raisins
I got sugar confused with raisins once... :oops:
User avatar
emilystrange
Above the Chemist
Posts: 9031
Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.

wtf? HOW?!?!
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
User avatar
Brideoffrankenstein
Overbomber
Posts: 2883
Joined: 15 Jan 2004, 01:51

Well I got taken to this very posh restaurant (where they had bottles of wine on the wine list for £300 :eek: ) and we came out and had coffee and there were these little finger bowls with things in that I thought were raisins. I thought it must be some bizarre posh thing that I didn't know about (coffee and raisins after dinner). But what I thought were raisins was actually posh expensive brown sugar which looked like those little shingle stones you get on the beach - and I just stopped myself from taking a handful of them before it was too late! :oops: :lol:
User avatar
Big Si
School Bully
Posts: 6747
Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

Brideoffrankenstein wrote:Well I got taken to this very posh restaurant (where they had bottles of wine on the wine list for £300 :eek: )
Courtesy of Mr "Troozaluss Carprayshun" :?:

:notworthy:
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
User avatar
emilystrange
Above the Chemist
Posts: 9031
Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.

ah.. am with you. anywhere i've heard of round these parts?

(for a short while, i was very worried about you)
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
User avatar
Brideoffrankenstein
Overbomber
Posts: 2883
Joined: 15 Jan 2004, 01:51

Big Si wrote:
Brideoffrankenstein wrote:Well I got taken to this very posh restaurant (where they had bottles of wine on the wine list for £300 :eek: )
Courtesy of Mr "Troozaluss Carprayshun" :?:
No the best he could do was a donut on Brighton Pier which promptly got stolen by a large and dangerous seagull :(


Only joking! :kiss:
User avatar
Brideoffrankenstein
Overbomber
Posts: 2883
Joined: 15 Jan 2004, 01:51

emilystrange wrote:ah.. am with you. anywhere i've heard of round these parts?

(for a short while, i was very worried about you)
Morston Hall near Holt, Blakeney, Cley etc
User avatar
emilystrange
Above the Chemist
Posts: 9031
Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.

ooo get her...
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
User avatar
lazarus corporation
Lord Protector
Posts: 3444
Joined: 09 May 2004, 17:42
Location: out there on a darkened road
Contact:

Brideoffrankenstein wrote:
Big Si wrote:
Brideoffrankenstein wrote:Well I got taken to this very posh restaurant (where they had bottles of wine on the wine list for £300 :eek: )
Courtesy of Mr "Troozaluss Carprayshun" :?:
No the best he could do was a donut on Brighton Pier which promptly got stolen by a large and dangerous seagull :(


Only joking! :kiss:
there were 2 donuts - I was splashing out.

:lol:
User avatar
boudicca
Sister Midnight
Posts: 7427
Joined: 15 Sep 2004, 16:15
Location: embrace the margin
Contact:

Grapes should always be made into fine wine, not piffling wrinkly bastard raisins.
;D

My sympathies are with you, dear.
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
User avatar
Andrew S
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1820
Joined: 05 May 2002, 01:00
Location: Glasgow

boudicca wrote:Grapes should always be made into fine wine, not piffling wrinkly bastard raisins.
At last! People who share my hatred of dried fruit :D That covers raisins, currants, sultanat, prunes, dates etc. etc. The only time I find dried grapes edible is in a clootie dumpling, probably because it's been boiled for so long, the fruit has turned back into grapes. It's bad enough when raisins appear in otherwise innocent looking cheesecake and carrot cake, but it should under no circumstances be be put into chocolate :evil:
User avatar
Planet Dave
Underneath the Rock
Posts: 6749
Joined: 22 Apr 2003, 23:51
Location: Where the streets fold round

I'll sign up for that! The Kick Dried Fruit Out Of Britain campaign starts here...
'What a heavy load Einstein must have had. Morons everywhere.'
User avatar
boudicca
Sister Midnight
Posts: 7427
Joined: 15 Sep 2004, 16:15
Location: embrace the margin
Contact:

It's in a chicken "curry" they disturb me the most...Image

WTF is all that about?
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
User avatar
Loki
God of Mischief and Discord
Posts: 2351
Joined: 14 Jul 2003, 14:25
Location: Ragnarök

Sometimes, I'm slow. Sometimes, I'm not. Sometimes I just do the opening track from Hot Fuss.

:roll:
Loki was never worshiped as the other Gods,
Which is quite understandable.
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

The girl can't help it. :lol:
User avatar
MrChris
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1413
Joined: 21 May 2003, 11:34
Location: A Forest

I believe raisins are absolutely evil - along with their squidgy cousins, currants and sultanas. Many a time I've had to turn down granny's cake, or a delicious-sounding korma, because of their pernicious presence. I just can't abide them, and I'm glad to know I'm not, perhaps, the only one. The only time this gives me real trouble is at Christmas, when there is something just so...well...Christmassy about mince pies, and I just have to have one. I just pretend I'm eating something else, which is very difficult. Perhaps women are better at this.
Chris

---------------------------------------------
Again and again and again...
User avatar
Big Si
School Bully
Posts: 6747
Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

'mon the Dried Fruit!

:lol: :twisted:

Image
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
User avatar
boudicca
Sister Midnight
Posts: 7427
Joined: 15 Sep 2004, 16:15
Location: embrace the margin
Contact:

:lol: Si, that's cruel...

... I must confess though, I am rather partial to dried banana... :oops:

I still want to join the campaign though, purely because of bad chicken curry and the HORROR that is DRIED APRICOTS.
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
User avatar
Big Si
School Bully
Posts: 6747
Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

boudicca wrote:I still want to join the campaign though, purely because of bad chicken curry.
I like bad Chicken Curry! :P
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
User avatar
DerekR
Doobie Brother
Posts: 1860
Joined: 17 Apr 2003, 17:55
Location: lost

Currants and raisins.....evil, foul tasting little bastards :urff:
Post Reply