Many times in my life have I been confronted with a plate full of unassuming, succulent chocolate cookies, and each time they have silently begged me to partake of their spotty molten goodness.
I am too much the lady not to oblige. I select my fare carefully, choosing only the most worthy biscuit, teasing them with my fickle nature as they do me with their sweet enticements. We dance, I lead; at last, eager with anticipation, I pluck the lucky winner from the plate and take a bite...
...only to find that the cookie is an imposter. Raisins masquerading as chocolate chips! Oatmeal disguised as the other non-chocolate parts of a chocolate chip cookie!
The subterfuge of those wrinkley little ex-grapes offends me. I do not see the point of cookies without chocolate in them.
I shall have my revenge.
The Consequence of Subterfuge
CorpPunk wrote:I am too much the lady.......
- hallucienate
- Overbomber
- Posts: 4602
- Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
- Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
- Contact:
...but you still ate them anyway?
- emilystrange
- Above the Chemist
- Posts: 9031
- Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
- Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.
i dont see the point of raisins.
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
- Brideoffrankenstein
- Overbomber
- Posts: 2883
- Joined: 15 Jan 2004, 01:51
I got sugar confused with raisins once...CorpPunk wrote:Raisins
- emilystrange
- Above the Chemist
- Posts: 9031
- Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
- Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.
wtf? HOW?!?!
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
- Brideoffrankenstein
- Overbomber
- Posts: 2883
- Joined: 15 Jan 2004, 01:51
Well I got taken to this very posh restaurant (where they had bottles of wine on the wine list for £300 ) and we came out and had coffee and there were these little finger bowls with things in that I thought were raisins. I thought it must be some bizarre posh thing that I didn't know about (coffee and raisins after dinner). But what I thought were raisins was actually posh expensive brown sugar which looked like those little shingle stones you get on the beach - and I just stopped myself from taking a handful of them before it was too late!
Courtesy of Mr "Troozaluss Carprayshun"Brideoffrankenstein wrote:Well I got taken to this very posh restaurant (where they had bottles of wine on the wine list for £300 )
- emilystrange
- Above the Chemist
- Posts: 9031
- Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
- Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.
ah.. am with you. anywhere i've heard of round these parts?
(for a short while, i was very worried about you)
(for a short while, i was very worried about you)
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
- Brideoffrankenstein
- Overbomber
- Posts: 2883
- Joined: 15 Jan 2004, 01:51
No the best he could do was a donut on Brighton Pier which promptly got stolen by a large and dangerous seagullBig Si wrote:Courtesy of Mr "Troozaluss Carprayshun"Brideoffrankenstein wrote:Well I got taken to this very posh restaurant (where they had bottles of wine on the wine list for £300 )
Only joking!
- Brideoffrankenstein
- Overbomber
- Posts: 2883
- Joined: 15 Jan 2004, 01:51
Morston Hall near Holt, Blakeney, Cley etcemilystrange wrote:ah.. am with you. anywhere i've heard of round these parts?
(for a short while, i was very worried about you)
- emilystrange
- Above the Chemist
- Posts: 9031
- Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
- Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.
ooo get her...
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
- lazarus corporation
- Lord Protector
- Posts: 3443
- Joined: 09 May 2004, 17:42
- Location: out there on a darkened road
- Contact:
there were 2 donuts - I was splashing out.Brideoffrankenstein wrote:No the best he could do was a donut on Brighton Pier which promptly got stolen by a large and dangerous seagullBig Si wrote:Courtesy of Mr "Troozaluss Carprayshun"Brideoffrankenstein wrote:Well I got taken to this very posh restaurant (where they had bottles of wine on the wine list for £300 )
Only joking!
At last! People who share my hatred of dried fruit That covers raisins, currants, sultanat, prunes, dates etc. etc. The only time I find dried grapes edible is in a clootie dumpling, probably because it's been boiled for so long, the fruit has turned back into grapes. It's bad enough when raisins appear in otherwise innocent looking cheesecake and carrot cake, but it should under no circumstances be be put into chocolateboudicca wrote:Grapes should always be made into fine wine, not piffling wrinkly bastard raisins.
- Planet Dave
- Underneath the Rock
- Posts: 6741
- Joined: 22 Apr 2003, 23:51
- Location: Where the streets fold round
I'll sign up for that! The Kick Dried Fruit Out Of Britain campaign starts here...
'What a heavy load Einstein must have had. Morons everywhere.'
I believe raisins are absolutely evil - along with their squidgy cousins, currants and sultanas. Many a time I've had to turn down granny's cake, or a delicious-sounding korma, because of their pernicious presence. I just can't abide them, and I'm glad to know I'm not, perhaps, the only one. The only time this gives me real trouble is at Christmas, when there is something just so...well...Christmassy about mince pies, and I just have to have one. I just pretend I'm eating something else, which is very difficult. Perhaps women are better at this.
Chris
---------------------------------------------
Again and again and again...
---------------------------------------------
Again and again and again...
'mon the Dried Fruit!
- boudicca
- Sister Midnight
- Posts: 7427
- Joined: 15 Sep 2004, 16:15
- Location: embrace the margin
- Contact:
Si, that's cruel...
... I must confess though, I am rather partial to dried banana...
I still want to join the campaign though, purely because of bad chicken curry and the HORROR that is DRIED APRICOTS.
... I must confess though, I am rather partial to dried banana...
I still want to join the campaign though, purely because of bad chicken curry and the HORROR that is DRIED APRICOTS.
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
I like bad Chicken Curry!boudicca wrote:I still want to join the campaign though, purely because of bad chicken curry.