The 5th Test - The Oval

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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ruffers
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Let's see if cricket can pick us up after last night's debacle. Worry here though we've changed the shape of them team with Collingwood.

AND AS WE SPEAK we won the toss - get in there and get batting boys, looking for 450
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RicheyJames
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we've bottled it before we've started. our aggressive bowling attack has had the crims under pressure all through the series but now we've gone for the "safe" option with collingwood. it gives the impression that we're playing for a draw from the off which, along with the second resurrection of mcgrath, has got to give the convicts a boost.

still, as you've pointed out, at least vaughan's managed to win the most important toss of his career.

it's going to be a long five days...

edit: the strains of jerusalem in the background of tms are making the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end...
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emilystrange
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*is wibbly*
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andymackem
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At least Collingwood is in decent form and has some test experience.

This doesn't seem like the ideal game to throw in an untried Tremlett or a low-confidence Anderson, IMHO.

Bat through today and pray for rain. Good enough for me :lol:
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markfiend
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I can't get streaming TMS to work. Guardian OBO for me.
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RicheyJames
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can someone please explain what the point of ian bell is?
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markfiend
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:urff: Start the rain-dance...
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
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ruffers
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I'm about a mile away and it's clear and blue :(
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Ed Rhombus
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RicheyJames wrote:can someone please explain what the point of ian bell is?
To force the early retirement of Graham Thorpe and play stupid shots in tight rin chases
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andymackem
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RicheyJames wrote:can someone please explain what the point of ian bell is?
To 'ring' the changes. Of course.

/gets coat/
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markfiend
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Without wanting to open the whole Thorpe can of worms, you'd think they'd pick someone who can actually bat...

Come to think of it, a wicket-keeper who can keep wicket wouldn't go amiss either.
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
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Tinkerbell
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RicheyJames wrote:can someone please explain what the point of ian bell is?
I was just wondering the same thing (albeit with more swear words) :evil:
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markfiend
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To be fair to Bell...
Guardian Over-by-over commentary wrote:All well and good ... but did any of you - or me, for that matter - say this when Bell had a Test average of 297 in mid-July? No. Next.
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
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markfiend
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Has anyone else been trying to get e-mails onto OBO? In response to this...
Guardian OBO wrote:More chinamen from Katich, and for the JCLs, a chinaman bowler is basically a left-arm wristspinner - so instead of spinning it from leg stump to off, like normal left-arm spinners, he spins it from off to leg. They are dangerous customers, chinamen (note the lack of a cap 'C'), the loosest of cannons in the spin-bowing, erm, arsenal.
I wrote this...
I wrote:You learn something every day. I was always under the impression that a chinaman was the left-arm wrist-spinner's version of the googly; it looks like the normal off-to-leg of left arm wrist spin but actually goes leg-to-off. Is there a specific term for this delivery then?
As they didn't print it that session, can anyone here help with my somewhat arcane query? :lol:
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ruffers
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Can't help you, although I did once get one on when the discussion was about the hottest thing in the universe.

It's a slice of tomato by the way, out of a toasted sandwich, draping on to your lower lip after you weren't able to bite it off cleanly due to the temperature of the toasted sandwich's filling.
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markfiend
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:notworthy: I hope they agreed with you.
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Norman Hunter
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ruffers wrote: It's a slice of tomato by the way, out of a toasted sandwich, draping on to your lower lip after you weren't able to bite it off cleanly due to the temperature of the toasted sandwich's filling.
Nah - it's the filling from an Xmas mince pie, straight outta the oven (didn't know, obviously). Stuck to my bottom lip like bastard napalm and I had a blister over that period. Makes me wince thinking about it - makes everyone else who was there crease up with laughter :(
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ruffers
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Nice. Possibly marginally hotter than the McDonald's Apple Pie filling which is, of course, marginally hotter than the surface of the sun.



It's a cricket thread, we have to talk about cake etc.
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RicheyJames
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markfiend wrote:Has anyone else been trying to get e-mails onto OBO?
not cricket but... i got the very last word on the grauniad's minute-by-minute report on the england-australia football friendly a couple of years ago. in response to england crashing to a(nother) humiliating defeat i suggested we find burn the posts, the players' shirts or sven to create some new "ashes".

which brings us back to cricket...
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andymackem
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markfiend wrote:To be fair to Bell...
Guardian Over-by-over commentary wrote:All well and good ... but did any of you - or me, for that matter - say this when Bell had a Test average of 297 in mid-July? No. Next.
By mid-July had he played test cricket against anyone other than Bangladesh? I'm not entirely buying that .... he's failed to prove himself at the highest level.

On a different note, did anyone see the super-slow-mo footage of a 93mph bouncer hitting Strauss's bat? It was like watching wood turn to jelly. Astonishing images.
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Ed Rhombus
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andymackem wrote:
markfiend wrote:To be fair to Bell...
Guardian Over-by-over commentary wrote:All well and good ... but did any of you - or me, for that matter - say this when Bell had a Test average of 297 in mid-July? No. Next.
By mid-July had he played test cricket against anyone other than Bangladesh? I'm not entirely buying that .... he's failed to prove himself at the highest level.
65 and 162 not out against Bangladesh

70 not out against the Windies

The 297 was both the average and the total runs scored
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markfiend
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The point the guy on the Guardian site was making was that the selectors couldn't drop someone with a 297 average, and they wanted Pietersen in so... bye-bye Thorpe.

On the whole I think they made a big mistake; Bell has made little contribution with the bat. OK he's taken a couple of catches, but you want more from a cricketer than fielding ability don't you? I was just trying to inject a little balance ;)
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andymackem
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They could if he was untested at the highest level. They certainly could after he failed at the highest level.

If it helps there are some Pakistani kids down my street who play a lot of cricket in their back garden. I'd guess I could average 297 against them, providing we play with a tennis ball on tarmac (none of this dastardly spinner nonsense). That's international cricket ... when do I play for England?

Picking Bell has been the one major error in this series.
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andymackem
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They could if he was untested at the highest level. They certainly could after he failed at the highest level.

If it helps there are some Pakistani kids down my street who play a lot of cricket in their back garden. I'd guess I could average 297 against them, providing we play with a tennis ball on tarmac (none of this dastardly spinner nonsense). That's international cricket ... when do I play for England?

Picking Bell has been the one major error in this series.
Names are just a souvenir ...
Russian footie in the run-up to the World Cup - my latest E-book available from https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07DGJFF6G
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ruffers
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Baaaaaahhhwled Shane. :(
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