Graz, Austria

andymackem · 19 Nov 2005, 13:08

Buoyed by a surprisingly successful trip to Berlin (I even managed a comprehensible sentence in German, and met a Russian-speaking alsatian in a dive bar in the darkest East) I'm heading back to Germanic parts next week.

Unfortunately my knowledge of Austria is based around Alps, Mozart, the Alps, Vienna and some mountains. And to avoid all of this I'm going to Arnie's home town, Graz. If Ultravox had shifted cities I could tell you this place means nothing to me. Apparently it can't even rustle up a small hill (I'm English, so I don't need towering peaks to impress me. A gentle incline will usually work, but it seems I will be disappointed anyway).

The main reason for going is a young lady, inevitably, but I need things to occupy me while she's working. I have four days and one hire car, and I'm not going to learn to ski.

I have found a football match in Slovenia, which is only an hour's drive away, but I sense this may not be an acceptable option for my hostess. Advice, anyone?

boudicca · 19 Nov 2005, 14:55

Been there.

Well, went through it in a bus, aged 4 and a half, at 3 o'clock in the morning...

...so I can't tell you much.

Obviousman · 19 Nov 2005, 15:26

All I know is they build loads of cars, mostly SUVs there. Mercedes G and M-class, Jeeps and Chryslers...

That's all and not very helpful, I'm affraid

eastmidswhizzkid · 19 Nov 2005, 16:44

with a little dyslexia and a massive imagination, hey presto! austria becomes australia....that should be enough for anyone.

andymackem · 19 Nov 2005, 18:57

I had a bad feeling about this trip from the start. Graz appears to be the Coventry of Austria.

Hurrah! All I need now is a Fraulein Godiva and I'm laughing.

boudicca · 19 Nov 2005, 20:17

andymackem wrote:I had a bad feeling about this trip from the start. Graz appears to be the Coventry of Austria.

Teutonic two-tone bands?

"This town... is 'comin' like a geist-town"...

andymackem · 19 Nov 2005, 22:40

boudicca wrote:
andymackem wrote:I had a bad feeling about this trip from the start. Graz appears to be the Coventry of Austria.
Teutonic two-tone bands?

"This town... is 'comin' like a geist-town"...

You haven't heard the fenland version: "Diss town, be a-cummin loike a ghostie town" (assuming the fens mysteriously relocated to somewhere off the M5, of course).

Still, anything's possible. Last weekend I heard a band fronted by the bastard Swiss offspring of Marc Almond and Brett Anderson. Who were actually quite good. FAQ was the name, 'Is Pornongraphy Art?' is the embarrassingly entitled disc currently enlivening my daily commute. A bit like The Faint, but more synthy. Shades of Soft Cell, of course, and Brett for looks and androgyny. But from Switzerland? /scratches head/

scotty · 19 Nov 2005, 23:16

andymackem wrote: ghostie town"

Sounds like a mighty fine place to me

boudicca · 20 Nov 2005, 15:07

andymackem wrote:Brett Anderson

Ahhh... in my preteen years, Suede videos provided quite an "awakening"...

Still definitely would

.
Now, where's this lookey-likey?

emilystrange · 20 Nov 2005, 15:50

*quiver*

andymackem · 20 Nov 2005, 20:49

boudicca wrote:
andymackem wrote:Brett Anderson
Ahhh... in my preteen years, Suede videos provided quite an "awakening"...

Still definitely would .
Now, where's this lookey-likey?

I did take some pictures at the gig. But unless someone can tell me something useful, interesting and accurate about Graz I won't tell you where to find them

Also the pictures came out a bit s**t, so you won't have much luck anyway, I wouldn't think. But a bit of emotional blackmail never hurt anyone, did it?

canon docre · 20 Nov 2005, 21:05

Graz is one of the dullest places on earth.*

* this information is neither interesting nor useful, but accurate.
Pics now?

boudicca · 20 Nov 2005, 21:10

andymackem wrote:something useful, interesting and accurate about Graz

It gets dark there at night.

(A worthy factoid, I think, there are of course places in the world where it doesn't. Plus it really is all I can manage. Oh no wait, the locals speak German

).

Can I see this fella now?

canon docre · 20 Nov 2005, 21:14

boudicca wrote: Oh no wait, the locals speak German ).

Wrong. No one can call their oral disease German by any means.

boudicca · 20 Nov 2005, 21:24

canon docre wrote:
boudicca wrote: Oh no wait, the locals speak German ).
Wrong. No one can call their oral disease German by any means.

Ahh... the Deutsch equivalent of a Birmingham accent, is it?

That's safe for me to say here, isn't it? No Brummies around?... ach they're all illiterate anyway...

Obviousman · 20 Nov 2005, 22:48

canon docre wrote:
boudicca wrote: Oh no wait, the locals speak German ).
Wrong. No one can call their oral disease German by any means.

Is Austrian (or more specifically the Graz dialect) that bad then?

canon docre · 20 Nov 2005, 23:05

Obviousman wrote:
canon docre wrote:
boudicca wrote: Oh no wait, the locals speak German ).
Wrong. No one can call their oral disease German by any means.

Is Austrian (or more specifically the Graz dialect) that bad then?

It isnt even understandable for someone livng a few kilometers outside. It just sounds very disgusting. Imagine a dim-witted farmer who enjoys his sheeps every now and then.

andymackem · 20 Nov 2005, 23:09

See, I told you it was the Coventry of Austria. I'm really going to hate this place, aren't I?

Still unsure of the usefulness of all this. Or my pics. Possibly I hadn't mentioned the impact of alcohol on my (negligible) photographic skills.

www.f-a-q.ch will probably help. It claims to be the band's website. You're looking for Philip Noirjean, which is a great name.

Planet Dave · 20 Nov 2005, 23:13

canon docre wrote: Imagine a dim-witted farmer who enjoys his sheeps every now and then.

Imagine it? I live there. It's called Yorkshire.

canon docre · 20 Nov 2005, 23:15

Planet Dave wrote:
canon docre wrote: Imagine a dim-witted farmer who enjoys his sheeps every now and then.
Imagine it? I live there. It's called Yorkshire.

Well, I hope it's not you then?

andymackem · 20 Nov 2005, 23:22

http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/andymacke ... pg&.src=ph

Might give some idea. Possibly more than the official website, which is alarmingly bad. But then again, so's this pic.

The Brett connection was more to do with his mannerisms. The Marc Almond was definitely more to do with mannerism and voice.

Planet Dave · 20 Nov 2005, 23:22

canon docre wrote:
Planet Dave wrote:
canon docre wrote: Imagine a dim-witted farmer who enjoys his sheeps every now and then.
Imagine it? I live there. It's called Yorkshire.
Well, I hope it's not you then?

Nah, I'm a foreigner round these parts. Exxiled Mancunian and all that. I just nick stuff.

Ozpat · 21 Nov 2005, 08:23

andymackem wrote:I'm really going to hate this place, aren't I?

Just give it a chance and make the best of it! It might even snow overthere...go "langlaufen" and sing a song like snowdriver!

Have a good time!

andymackem · 21 Nov 2005, 10:10

Ozpat wrote:
andymackem wrote:I'm really going to hate this place, aren't I?
Just give it a chance and make the best of it! It might even snow overthere...go "langlaufen" and sing a song like snowdriver!

Have a good time!

Oh, don't get me wrong. This is all about the management of expectations. Most of my best trips have been to wholly unlikely places. Including Oldham, Doncaster and Halifax.

Snow would be good, but see my earlier point re mountains and the sad lack thereof.

21 Nov 2005, 12:05

If you managed to enjoy yourself in Oldham, hats off!

I was born there. And went to school there. ShÃ®t-hole of the universe. I couldn't leave fast enough