Repent!

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
Post Reply
User avatar
Gottdammerung
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 650
Joined: 20 Aug 2004, 13:18
Location: 'Ackney
Contact:
Contact Gottdammerung

http://www.absolution-online.com/confessional/

Takes a while but now you can find out what you need to do to redeem yourself!!

I've been very naughty and need to do the following:

1311 Hail Marys

57 Our Fathers


and an 8 Week fast!!
Top
User avatar
Obviousman
Outside the Simian Flock
Posts: 7090
Joined: 22 Aug 2004, 12:14
Location: Soon over Babaluma
Contact:
Contact Obviousman

Only 548 Hail Marys and 19 Our Fathers.

And I have to fast for two weeks...

Not that much, is it :lol:

I'll go and chat with God about it :innocent:
Styles are a lie.

My Facebook/My Flickr
Top
User avatar
Ozpat
From the Lowlands
Posts: 6758
Joined: 16 Aug 2005, 13:14
Location: In the place through which we wander.

Obviousman wrote: I'll go and chat with God about it :innocent:
Please say hello to Him from me Z. I have been chatting with Him quite a bit the last few days. He should know me by now. :innocent:
"as we walk on the floodland"
Top
User avatar
boudicca
Sister Midnight
Posts: 7427
Joined: 15 Sep 2004, 16:15
Location: embrace the margin
Contact:
Contact boudicca

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Recite 3205 Hail Marys and 179 Our Fathers.

I s**t you not! I'm evil, I tells ya! :twisted:

And what do you suppose a 23-WEEK FAST would do to someone who weighs less than 7 stone? :eek: :eek: :urff:

Haven't been to confession since I was 12. That's 10 years of good sinnin' :wink: .
I've bloody no intention of going now!
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
Top
User avatar
Zuma
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1831
Joined: 24 Jan 2003, 00:36

Pizza is on me Claire :lol:
Top
nick the stripper
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1732
Joined: 16 Dec 2004, 01:02
Location: Somewhere between Athens and Jerusalem.
Contact:
Contact nick the stripper

May the Almighty God have mercy on you, and forgiving your sins, bring you to life everlasting. Amen.

May the Almighty and Merciful God grant you pardon, absolution, and remission of your sins.
Venial Sins

Recite 2266 Hail Marys and 73 Our Fathers.
Mortal Sins

Consider the implications of what you have done. You must take all steps possible to undo what has been done, and make right what you have done wrong.

You should fast for a total of 7 weeks. If this is too much to do at once due to the length of the fast, or infirmity, it is acceptable to break a fast into smaller sections. If you are unsure how long it is safe to fast for, consult a doctor.

If your sin also broke the law of the land in which you live, you must confess to the authorities.

I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.

May the Passion of Our Lord Jesus Christ, the merits of the Blessed Virgin Mary and of all the Saints, what good you have done or what evil you have suffered be to you for the remission of your sins, growth in grace and the reward of everlasting life. Amen.
Repenting is for the week. :lol:
Top
User avatar
eastmidswhizzkid
Faster Than The Light Of Speed
Posts: 9822
Joined: 24 Mar 2005, 00:01
Location: WhizzWorld
Contact:
Contact eastmidswhizzkid

8 weeks on the fast stuff; 1,987 hairy marys (a good year 1987) ; and 52 daughters of the revolution.....or something like that. :roll:

and people really do believe this s**t - off they go and spill their guts out to some sweaty little bloke in a dress, who's cracking one off behind the screen, convinced that this makes it all better so they can commit exactly the same "sins" the next week. :roll:

the romans had the right idea: lion -food. :twisted:
Well I was handsome and I was strong
And I knew the words to every song.
"Did my singing please you?"
"No! The words you sang were wrong!"
:bat:
Top
User avatar
Mrs. Snowey
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 998
Joined: 12 Mar 2004, 14:43
Location: going nowhere. Fast.

eastmidswhizzkid wrote: and people really do believe this s**t - off they go and spill their guts out to some sweaty little bloke in a dress, who's cracking one off behind the screen, convinced that this makes it all better so they can commit exactly the same "sins" the next week. :roll:
You know, that doesn't sound a million miles away from Jerry Springer, p'raps someone should tell CV :innocent: 8)
Why do keyboards get so dirty?
Top
User avatar
boudicca
Sister Midnight
Posts: 7427
Joined: 15 Sep 2004, 16:15
Location: embrace the margin
Contact:
Contact boudicca

Zuma wrote:Pizza is on me Claire :lol:
Thanks! :lol: :notworthy:

I think coveting your pizza might have been one of my sins... :innocent: :wink:

But there's something f**ked up here. I am never more evil than Lee. I can't have done this right...
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
Top
User avatar
scotty
Overbomber
Posts: 4880
Joined: 10 Jun 2005, 23:03
Location: Behind the Door.........

eastmidswhizzkid wrote:8 weeks on the fast stuff; 1,987 hairy marys (a good year 1987) ; and 52 daughters of the revolution.....or something like that. :roll:

and people really do believe this s**t - off they go and spill their guts out to some sweaty little bloke in a dress, who's cracking one off behind the screen, convinced that this makes it all better so they can commit exactly the same "sins" the next week. :roll:

the romans had the right idea: lion -food. :twisted:
Are you a "Prodie" then EMWK, I can just see the next avitar, the head and star adorned in Red White and Blue hat and scarf with "Sisters 1690" written under it :innocent: :twisted: :lol:
Being brave is coming home at 2am half drunk, smelling of perfume, climbing into bed, slapping the wife on the arse and saying,"right fatty, you're next!!"
Top
User avatar
Izzy HaveMercy
The Worlds Greatest Living Belgian
Posts: 8844
Joined: 29 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Long Dark Forties
Contact:
Contact Izzy HaveMercy

Recite 1042 Hail Marys and 66 Our Fathers.

You should fast for a total of 11 weeks.

NO s**t! :eek:

They think I've got nothing better to do or what???

Cripes...

IZ.
.
.
For Greater Good - Ambient Music for the Masses...
.
.
Top
User avatar
Zuma
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1831
Joined: 24 Jan 2003, 00:36

boudicca wrote:
Zuma wrote:Pizza is on me Claire :lol:
Thanks! :lol: :notworthy:

I think coveting your pizza might have been one of my sins... :innocent: :wink:

But there's something f**ked up here. I am never more evil than Lee. I can't have done this right...
It was not coveting anyway, it was shared amongst friends, so certainly not a sin... :lol:
Top
User avatar
boudicca
Sister Midnight
Posts: 7427
Joined: 15 Sep 2004, 16:15
Location: embrace the margin
Contact:
Contact boudicca

Zuma wrote: It was not coveting anyway, it was shared amongst friends, so certainly not a sin... :lol:
Yeh, but the thing is, if you hadn't offered it freely, I'd have nicked it anyway :twisted: :innocent: .
(And Indrek would probably have started knawing on the edge of the table)... :lol:
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
Top
User avatar
scotty
Overbomber
Posts: 4880
Joined: 10 Jun 2005, 23:03
Location: Behind the Door.........

boudicca wrote:
Zuma wrote: It was not coveting anyway, it was shared amongst friends, so certainly not a sin... :lol:
Yeh, but the thing is, if you hadn't offered it freely, I'd have nicked it anyway :twisted: :innocent: .
(And Indrek would probably have started knawing on the edge of the table)
You & Indrek were perched on the end of the table like a couple of Craws eyeing up Zumas pizza like it was a fresh cadaver you'd just flew over :innocent: :twisted: :lol:
Being brave is coming home at 2am half drunk, smelling of perfume, climbing into bed, slapping the wife on the arse and saying,"right fatty, you're next!!"
Top
User avatar
eastmidswhizzkid
Faster Than The Light Of Speed
Posts: 9822
Joined: 24 Mar 2005, 00:01
Location: WhizzWorld
Contact:
Contact eastmidswhizzkid

scotty wrote:
eastmidswhizzkid wrote:8 weeks on the fast stuff; 1,987 hairy marys (a good year 1987) ; and 52 daughters of the revolution.....or something like that. :roll:

and people really do believe this s**t - off they go and spill their guts out to some sweaty little bloke in a dress, who's cracking one off behind the screen, convinced that this makes it all better so they can commit exactly the same "sins" the next week. :roll:

the romans had the right idea: lion -food. :twisted:
Are you a "Prodie" then EMWK, I can just see the next avitar, the head and star adorned in Red White and Blue hat and scarf with "Sisters 1690" written under it :innocent: :twisted: :lol:
naah, it's only in our little celtic colonies where you have to be signed up to one lot of god-botherers or the other - for life,regardless of whether you believe or not.
i did actually go to a CofE primary school, but anglicanism being such a wishy washy faith i managed to realise that it was a load of bollocks without being loaded down with any guilt.
Well I was handsome and I was strong
And I knew the words to every song.
"Did my singing please you?"
"No! The words you sang were wrong!"
:bat:
Top
User avatar
Zuma
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1831
Joined: 24 Jan 2003, 00:36

boudicca wrote:
Zuma wrote: It was not coveting anyway, it was shared amongst friends, so certainly not a sin... :lol:
Yeh, but the thing is, if you hadn't offered it freely, I'd have nicked it anyway :twisted: :innocent: .
(And Indrek would probably have started knawing on the edge of the table)... :lol:
Ok, being nice gets ye nowhere around here :lol:
Top
User avatar
boudicca
Sister Midnight
Posts: 7427
Joined: 15 Sep 2004, 16:15
Location: embrace the margin
Contact:
Contact boudicca

Zuma wrote: Ok, being nice gets ye nowhere around here :lol:
You won't have to do so many Hail Marys tho'.... :wink:
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
Top
Post Reply

Return to “General Chat”