25/12/81
“That’s Kim Wilde. Nice head of hair, nice pair of boots. 17 quid she told me. Last time I was on this programme I forgot the name of the Amen Corner. No chance of me forgetting the name of the, erm, er, er…HUMAN LEAGUES!�
“This is getting to be a pretty regular gig for me. That was Laurie Anderson and “O Superman�. And I’m sorry about these people, I like to take the kids with me when I go out working. The band that’s going to be the biggest band of 1982 – ALTERED IMAGES!�
4/2/82
“Howdy partners and welcome to TOTP. This is my first TOTP in 14 years, but it’s consistency that counts so you can watch for me again in 1996. And in case you’re thinking to yourselves ‘who is that twerp?’, I’m the bloke who comes on the radio late at night and plays you records by lots of sulky Belgians. These people are not Belgian – THEATRE OF HATE!�
“Love Makes The World Go Round. An interesting philosophy, and those were the Jets. Three brothers I’m advised, and I see no reason to disbelieve that. Now Soft Cell. Last time I saw them, a rather squalid gig in Leeds. Now on TOP OF THE POPS!�
“No.9 – “Queen’s Greatest Hits� – see if you can guess who that’s by!�
“At No.7 – “Modern Dance�, Various Artists – them again, eh?�
�At No.5 – “4� by Foreigner – a bit confusing, that!�
“Cuddly or what? That’s Christopher Cross…�
“Tommy Vance will be doing this job next week. I’ll be back in 1996…�
27/5/82
"Well hello and welcome to the rundown to the replay of the North London Charity Cup. TOTP, a little earlier than usual, somewhat truncated but full of famous people. One or two surprises and some wonderful teenbeat music. We start with a band which boasts at least two Queen's Park Rangers supporters - GENESIS!"
“That’s Genesis, boys and girls – really cute! And everywhere you go in this studio the place is just packed with Debbie Harry look-alikes. But seriously Debbie, very nice that you could come along to TOTP. This film we’re about to see, whereabouts did you do that?�
Debbie : “We did that down the Scilly Isles.�
“Did you? Yes, well we had a chance to do a really penetrating in depth interview so let’s now have a look at the film.�
“Well that’s the Duran Durans. And she’s still here – I think it’s me jumper she’s after. Debbie, do you have any particular favourites of your own in the Top 30?�
Debbie : “Well…�
“While you’re thinking about that, here’s a chance for you to enjoy me doing the countdown.�
“That’s really yummy if you ask me. At No.16 that’s Soft Cell, picking and grinning their way into your hearts. Now we’re going to go back to the charts, my old brave ones.�
“That’s Madness, now at No.1. Thank you every much Debbie for coming along to TOTP.�
Debbie : “Thank you, Peter!�
“Absolutely typical…�
12/8/82
“Hello and welcome to TOTP. Who’s sold out then? To start the programme, yet another one of those ensembles with a funny foreign name…�
“That’s Toto Coelo. It sounds like some kind of exotic skin disease. They did tell me what it meant, but to be perfectly honest with you, I’ve forgotten…�
“Favourites with decent folk everywhere, those were the Associates at No.25. Now a special treat for members of the Sheena Barmy Army. Are you watching in Cardiff? Are you watching in Swansea? SHEENA EASTON!�
“What an artiste! What an artiste! That’s Sheena Easton – her best since “9 To 5�.
“Aren’t they thin and doesn’t it make you spit? That’s Haysi Fantayzee at No.22, “John Wayne Is Big Leggy� – I’ve always thought so myself. These rather fine people over here are WAVELENGTH!�
“Up next on TOTP, Zoo. And as a special treat, the Hassani Troupe of Moroccan Tumblers – I never drink from anything else! The music provided by Kool & The Gang.�
30/9/82 :
Tony Blackburn : “Well the record that you’re listening to now of course comes from The Move, it’s called “Flowers In The Rain�, and 15 years ago this very day, this is the record that I opened Radio 1 up with. And we’re the only two survivors, aren’t we John?� (John pretends to be in a world of his own) “Aren’t we John???�
John Peel : “Er, yes that’s true Tony actually, that’s absolutely true. Now we’re going to enjoy the music of Ultravox.�
14/10/82
“At No.8 that’s Mari Wilson and the boys and girls of the village, “Just What I Always Wanted�. And now I think the moment that we’ve all secretly been looking forward to in our heart of hearts, this is Barry Manilow!�
“That’s Bazza. Barry Manilow. Don’t you just love him, eh? Very pleased to see this next act on TOTP ‘cos Kid Jensen and Peter Powell and myself have been playing their records for years. They’re excellent. Making their debut on the programme – TEARS FOR FEARS!�
“About 12 years ago, America turned up at my flat at about 3 o’clock in the morning wanting to sing me some of their songs and I told them where to go. I still think I made the right decision. These are the Pinkees!�
“That’s Melba Moore and “Love’s Comin’ At Ya� – whatever that means! Perhaps it’s best we don’t know. Now we go to No.30, the Pretenders and Zoo. 63 legs in harmony!�
“That’s “Reap The Wild Wind� – in purely agricultural terms rather a fatuous exercise! These two just came up with the Mary Rose – look well on it! Back to the charts.�
“Back to No.14 for this week’s highest new entry – these are the Beatles. This one’s for you, Pig.�
“…and at 2, “Do You Really Want To Hurt Me?�, the Culture Clubs. The Culture Clubs is just my little joke – don’t write to me about it! Still No.1 and rightly so – MUSICAL YOUTH!�
18/11/82
“You can call me an old silly if you like, but I think this is the best line-up for TOTP we’ve had for a very long time indeed. Laughter and melody, and lots of good clean fun. Here are Modern Romance!�
“Ah, don’t you just love those exotic Latin rhythms, eh? That’s Modern Romance, and now it’s Daryl Hall & John Oates.�
“Told you it was going to be a good TOTP, didn’t I? That’s the Human League at No.9. Now eyes down for a full house, No.13 – unlucky for some, Duran Duran – this is “Rio�
“The thing is – which one’s Simon? That’s Duran Duran and “Rio� which turns out to be a person rather than a geographical location. And up next, the wonderful Tears For Fears.�
“That’s Tears For Fears, and I really wanted that to get to No.1. Mind you, it still could. One of the singles of the year anyway. And here’s another one of them – from BLANCMANGE – “LIVING ON THE CEILING�!
“Back to No.24 – Renee & Renato coming up. See if you can guess which one’s which!�
“What an achingly lovely melody! Renee & Renato – I think I’m going to have to have a word with them after the programme. Now back to the charts.�
“I can do that – gis a job! That’s Wham! at No.10 and now we’re going to rejoin the charts at No.9�
25/12/82
Peel (wearing a Sheena Barmy Army T-shirt) : “Hello, we are your vibrant Radio 1 personalities.�
DLT : “Listen John, come on, jazz it up man, it’s Christmas Day, let’s have a little ‘Hey hey!�!
Peel : “Er, welcome to TOTP.�
DLT : “Oh, that was wonderful, John…�
“Well as you can see it’s getting dangerously festive here. That was Duran Duran. And up next we’ve got for you Dexy’s Midnight Runners – this is “Come On Eileen�, or anybody, I don’t really mind.�
“That’s Haircut 100. You know, underneath all that make-up they’re covered in spots! Now my favourite No.1 of the year – very pleased to see this get to No.1 – here’s Musical Youth. Flash it!�
“Well we’ve got a 27 on that from the Swiss jury.�
13/1/83
“Hello we’re on a five pound a man bonus for wearing these hats. Welcome to another TOTP. We’re the Burke and Hare of British broadcasting. I’m John, he’s the likeable Canadian.�
“Ethnic boys, ethnic. That’s a Bolivian fisherman’s wedding song by Incantation, or ‘Incantathion’ as the Gauchos call them back home on the pampas. Now we go with Men At Work from Australia.�
“Well if she scratched your back I don’t think you’d live to tell the tale, frankly.�
Jensen : “John, I think I’ll let you introduce this next act ‘cause I know they’re important to you, you play them a lot on your show.�
Peel : “This has meant a lot to me, I must admit. This is a very important moment of my life really. Keith Harris & Orville.�
“That’s one of the very best things since Napoleon’s retreat from Moscow. Keith Harris & Orville. Orville was the one in the woolly hat incidentally. Up next on TOTP, we’ve got the Belle Stars!�
“…and now at No.17 in the charts, happy birthday William, this is the theme music from ‘E.T.’�
“They look like a gang of debt collectors that lot! Those were the Maisonettes at No.15 in the charts. And now, because I’m the senior partner in this partnership, I get to read out the Top 10.�
“Well as you can imagine viewers, Kid and myself are a bit disappointed that Renee & Renato are no longer at No.1…�
“Next week’s TOTP will be introduced by a couple more people who have been sent up from the job centre – Gary Davies and Janice Long.�
Jensen : “I think we’d better say goodnight John.�
Peel : “Goodnight John.�
3/2/83
“Hello admirers, we’re the Torville & Dean of popular music. No, actually he’s Kid Jensen. He may not look like it, but he’s lots of fun…�
Peel : “Shiny Shiny, that’s Haysi Fantayzee. I hope my mother didn’t see that! Brian?�
Jensen : “Haha, thank you Jane…�
Jensen : “The second great success story of ’83, this is Kajagoogoo and this is called “Too Shy�.
Peel : “I liked his hat. That’s Kajagoogoo. What did you mean, the number two success story of the year?�
Jensen : “Well, I meant Wah! being number one.�
Peel : “Ah I see. Well that’s right, fair enough…�
“At 26, Incantation and “Cacharpaya� – delicious with a white wine sauce.�
Jensen : “Well we’ve had a number of letters from viewers recently who’ve commented on the great quality of some of the pop videos around. Haven’t we John?� (Peel pretends to be in a world of his own) “John?�
Peel : “Oh yes, we call this section of the programme the Top 10 Video Show. Cute, eh? Well it was his idea!�
“At No.5, “Too Shy�, Kajagoogoo. We’ve already seen these little blighters. I mean enough’s enough ,eh?�
“At No.3, a former No.1 – “You Can’t Hurry Love�, Phil Collins. Phil wants to travel and meet people.�
3/3/83
Presented by Peel (wearing a David Jensen T-shirt) and Jensen (wearing a John Peel T-shirt)
“Hello again, we’re the joy boys of radio…�
“That’s Forrest and “Rock The Boat�. And keeping things pretty darn nautical, our next band have got a new LP called “Dazzle Ships�. A right bunch of wools (?) if you ask me – Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark!�
Jensen : “Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark. Hey rhythm pal, what are wools (?)?�
Peel : “Well they are actually, and so am I. You’ll find out more during the Radio 1 week out in Liverpool…�
“Graduates there of the Kid Jensen school of dance movement, Bananarama, and, er (reads slowly from a piece of paper) “Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye�. Back to the charts!�
“At No.18 that’s “Baby Come To Me�. Sheer poetry, eh? I wish I’d thought of that.�
“At No. 4 it’s “Africa� by Toto. Rocking accountants from across the sea. Play the blues!�
Peel : “Next week’s TOTP is introduced by Tommy Vance and by Mike Smith.�
Jensen : “Hey, a case of, er, beauty and the beast, eh?�
Peel : “Simon Bates coming along as well is he then?�
23/3/83
Peel : “Well hello there fans and welcome to another TOTP. Sorry, can we do that again Tony?� (NO!)
Jensen : “No, wait a minute, this is live, it’s a live TOTP.�
Peel (pretending to be embarrassed) : “Live? You’re kidding…�
“And that’s David Bowie who’s going to be droning on and on and on on the laird’s (?) programme on Radio 1 tomorrow evening. Up next, Orange Juice asking the age old musical question, “Rip It Up�. Play those ukeleles, boys!�
“At 28, “Foster & Allen� by Maggie. No, that should be the other way round.�
“23, “Africa�, Toto. What a cute bunch of guys!�
“22, “Love On Your Side� – uncomfortable but fun – the Thompson Twins.�
“But now, admirers, we’re going to go back to No.26. This is Nick Heyward and “Whistle Down The Wind� – a rather futile activity in my view.�
(Following Altered Images) : “Well I don’t know who those people were but I thought the little lad was good. I think I could get them a gig at our local youth club.�
“At No.10, “High Life� – profoundly ethnic sounds of Modern Romance.�
Jensen : “And here’s another band we’d like to see down at our village youth club.�
Peel : “That’s right. Duran Duran – straight in at No.1. What’s it called again?�
Jensen : “Is There Something I Should Know??�
Peel : “That’s right. OK. Take it away…�
Peel : “That’s Duran Duran at No.1. And in case you’re wondering why it is that we’re live and why it’s Wednesday, it’s because tomorrow the BBC starts down the countdown to Eurovision 1983. Be there or be round the pub with him and me.�
Jensen : “Ha. Now here’s a group you probably won’t see in the Song For Europe. David Joseph and his band – “You Can’t Hide Your Love�. Hope to see you real soon. Bye!� (Peel does his silly dance)
28/4/83
“And that’s Galaxy. Now, what did you think of the song that won the Eurovision Song Contest? Ah, you too, eh? Well it’s ours now. Number 6, got up and finished sixth – this is Sweet Dreams!�
Jensen : “Well as you may know I’ve been on holiday for the past couple of weeks.�
Peel : “I didn’t know that actually.�
Jensen : “Yes John, I was in the Far East. Actually I have a feeling you’re not going to enjoy this next bit of the programme.�
Peel : “I think he’s probably right about this ‘cos what we’re going to see now is the laird’s holiday snaps, as it were, sort of set to music. And here he is messing about in Singapore.�
Jensen : “Actually John, you’ve been away too, haven’t you?�
Peel : “I have actually, yes. Very much the international man, me. The BBC sent me abroad, and here I am in Northern France doing the Eurovision, er, well the European chart.�
“Here I am off the coast of France. This is me, that’s France. And we’re going to be investigating the TOTP European chart. Are we going to be hearing songs from Italy about l’amore – great bulky tenors singing? Or is it going to be maudlin songs from France about gigolos dying of consumption in basements? Well, actually no, unfortunately it’s neither of these things…�
“Well here I am in Boulogne. And TOTP were decent enough to send me here on a day trip – they sent Jonathan King to Paris. Typical, isn’t it really?�
“Trying to find a bit of a souvenir for Kid Jensen, but I don’t think it’s really trashy enough.�
“The old fella outside the bar gave us a kiss after we’d finished filming. Haven’t washed since, and I rather suspect that he hasn’t either.�
“14, “Temptation� – resisted, resisted – that’s Heaven 17.�
“At 12, “Rosanna� – those transatlantic cuties, Toto.�
“Kissing The Pink, and nice to hear whistling coming back in pop music.�
“At 10, “Breakaway� – the multi-talented Tracey Ullman.�
“At 8, “True Love Ways� – the multi-talented Cliff Richard.�
“At No.6, “Let’s Dance� – the multi-talented David Bowie.�
“And at No.2, it’s “Words� – the multi-talented F.R. David!�
Jensen : “Next week it’s the 1000th edition of TOTP so that promises to be something really special.�
Peel : “Indeed it does. It’s a specially extended programme and it’s going to be carried in stereo on Radio 1.�
Jensen : “And there’ll be all sorts of exciting personalities.�
Peel : “And the Radio 1 DJs have promised to come along as well…�
5/5/83
Jensen : “Over to you, shorty..�
Peel : “OK, thanks very much, big guy. Well my dear, are you in a band?�
Clare Grogan : “Yeah.�
Peel : “That’s very very nice indeed. Here’s Jonathan King…�
23/6/83
European Charts
“Oh, thanks very much Simes. Well there’s Simes in West London, and I’m in Amsterdam. You win a few, you lose a few. And what we’re doing here is another European chart rundown. We’re going to start off though with the Dolly Dots who are a kind of double Bananarama, with a cherry on the top.�
“That was “Money Lover� from the Dolly Dots. And these are the Dolly Dots – six innocent fawn-like creatures in search of a father figure. And they’re going to give us the rundown of the Dutch Top 10 for this week…�
“Those are the Shorts at No.1 in the Dutch charts. What a little corker, eh? That’s also No.8 in the European charts. And also in the European charts this week are Kajagoogoo, the Eurythmics and Bonnie Tyler. This is No.5 and this is the moment you’ve really been waiting for. This is the Swiss No.1, and it’s by.. (reads from piece of paper)…Geier Sturzflug.�
“So what does your standard issue British tourist do when he comes to Amsterdam? He comes to the flower market – Tulips from Amsterdam, that sort of thing. The next record is very popular in all of the German speaking parts of Europe, and it’s No.1 in Germany. Robin Gibb. You remember? Course you do! This is called “Juliet�.
“Well here we are in one of the older parts of Amsterdam. This (points to a statue) is obviously someone who’s heard too many of my late night Radio 1 programmes – it’s all cobwebs. This next record is by Daniel who’s Yugoslavian, and it’s a huge hit all over Europe, in fact it’s the No.3 record in the European charts. A huge hit that is everywhere except in Britain. It’s called “Julie�.
“Sounds a lot like Shakin’ Stevens to me that does…�
7/7/83
Peel & Jensen trying to look like the Blues Brothers or something clicking their fingers.
Peel : “Welcome millions of admirers throughout the known world to another TOTP!�
Jensen : “And this week we’re going to kick off with one of your favourite bands, Roman Holliday making their debut and “Don’t Try & Stop It�. Hey!�
“Well you can say what you like but I think there were elements of sensuality in their performance. Those were the Mary Jane Girls from La. And now a chance for you to really bleed – here’s Iron Maiden at No.12, “The Trooper�!
“Rock ‘N’ Roll Is King�. Sheer poetry, eh? Wish I’d thought of that! Now making their annual appearance on TOTP, and looking pretty darn menacing to me, here are The Cure!�
Peel : “The Kid’s got a bit of a joke for you here. This is Jimmy The Hoover.�
Jensen : “Yeah, I reckon they’re really going to clean up.�
Peel : “Hey, that’s really great.�
Jensen : “Alright, if you think you’re so clever, let’s hear you do the chart.�
Peel : “OK.�
4/8/83
with Mike Smith!
“Hello and welcome to TOTP. I’m working this week with a man who was the star of this morning’s Breakfast Time…�
“At No.10 that’s Wham! and “Club Tropicana� and an Open University course in bed-making. “Wrapped Around Your Finger� now, this is a medical first for the Police. Go for it. Do a good set!�
“Up next it’s Galaxy. “Wait Until Tonight (My Love)�. On second thoughts, forget it!�
“Runners up again next season, Elt? That’s Elton John. And here’s Tracie – “Give It Some Emotion�, or whatever you’ve got, know what I mean?�
“Now back to 27 and here’s a man who’s a TOTP veteran - it’s Bruce Foxton!�
“It’s Late�, Shakin’ Stevens. Good old Shaky, eh?�
1/9/83
(cowboys)
“Sure am glad you could mosey on down for another TOTP. We’re live again this week, so far. “
“That’s Madness with “Wings Of A Dove� – delicious with a white wine sauce and I think at this time of the year petit pois if you can get ‘em. This is Gary Numan.�
“The last time I was in Paris was for the European Cup Final when we beat Real Madrid 1-0. The music that’s playing in the background is “Comment Ca Va� by the Shorts which we featured in our last European chart rundown. Can never understand why it wasn’t a hit! And the music you’re going to hear first in this week’s programme, No.9 in the European charts, comes from a couple of Italian lads, they’re still in the army. This has been No.1 in Italy for 2 and a half months. It’s called, er (reads from paper) “Vamos A La Playa�, and it is not as you might imagine a jolly song about having a great time on the beach. It’s actually a rather gloomy song about nuclear war. Take it away, lads…�
“We’re now where people come to do their weekend shopping. Le weekend shopping as they call it here, and also, you know, a little le pick-pocketing as well…�
Peel : “This is Ryan Paris who, in addition to being a great deal taller than I am, has the highest climber in this week’s European charts – No.26 to No.12, and it’s called “Dolce Vita�. This is your first record, and it’s a big hit where, all over Europe?�
Ryan : “Yeah, it’s a big hit. No.1 in Spain, in Holland, Belgium. Big hit!�
Peel : “But, despite being called Ryan Paris, you’re not actually French.�
Ryan : “No, I was born in Rome in Italy.�
Peel : “Somebody told me with this travelling business that you change your name every time you go, say like in Paris you’re Ryan Paris, and if you go to Munchen Gladbach you’re Ryan Munchen Gladbach. Is this true?�
Ryan : “No, it’s not true.�
Peel : “Good gimmick though…�
“That was Ryan Paris as he is at the moment, and he’s going to be in Britain next week – let’s hope they haven’t booked him into Ballsover!�
6/10/83
“That’s Depeche Mode at No.26. Now for a real man. Well actually, two blokes, a small desk and the Preston North End back four in one suit of clothes – Meat Loaf!�
“That was Meat Loaf. (to Jensen) Did you notice the sheep grazing on his lower slopes?�
10/11/83
Peel : “Hello and welcome to another live TOTP. I want you to know – these cozzies are his idea.�
Jensen : “He’s only sulking because he wanted to be Maid Marion…�
“Up next we’ve got Adam Ant, and you’re not going to believe what Kid Jensen called this in rehearsal this afternoon. “Puss ‘N Boots�.
Peel : “Well that’s Marilyn on TOTP, and this is big Jenny.�
Big Jenny : “And that’s Little John.�
Peel : “Absolutely typical! Eurythmics – not just a toothpaste, also a band.�
“17, the multi-talented Police – “Synchronicity II�.
“16, “Unconditional Love� from the multi-talented Donna Summer.�
“At 14, “New Song� – now a pretty old song – from Howard Jones.�
“13, the multi-talented Tracey Ullman – “They Don’t Know�.
“Mmmmm, Shaky! Shakin’ Stevens with the biggest jump of the week – 15 places to No.4 – “Cry Just A Little Bit�.
“That’s very…that’s Billy Joel (laughs), easily my favourite No.1 record of the week…�
22/12/83
Jensen : “Well that was Dennis Waterman & George Cole. Hey, that reminds me, have you got my Xmas present yet?�
Peel : “Er, you know, it’s, er, it’s in the post, you know what I mean? Pathetic, innit?�
“That Paul McCartney, eh? He’s a bit of a philosopher, isn’t he?�
“At 17, Barry Manilow – hear him and weep!�
“At 12, the ubiquitous Tracey Ullman – “Move Over Darling�.
“And at No.11, “What Is Love?� – the unanswerable question – here’s Howard Jones.�
5/1/84
Peel : “Well hello fans. Now you might think what we’ve got here is some kind of tribute to Mike Read, but actually what we’re celebrating is the 20th anniversary of TOTP.�
Jensen : “And I think we really look fab gear.�
Peel : “Yeah, there is that. This is very 1984 though this – Frankie Goes To Hollywood…�
Peel : “Well that’s Rod Stewart of course, and a few years ago he came to my wedding actually, as did this man here – a legendary name in British broadcasting – Alan Freeman, who introduced some of those very early Top Of The Popses or whatever the plural is. Do you have any anecdotes about these early programmes, Alan?�
Fluff : “No, not really, John, no.�
Peel : “Would you like to introduce the next part of the programme?�
Fluff : “No, I don’t think so, no.�
Peel : “Would you like a cup of tea?�
Fluff : “No, not really, but…�
Peel : “Let’s press on!�
“The Rolling Stones – “Let’s Spend The Night Together�. Your place or mine? On second thoughts…�
“A Whiter Shade Of Pale� from Procol Harum. Dig those threads, man!�
“Here’s Engelbert – what a hunk, eh? This is “The Last Waltz�.
“Now here’s a really cute bunch of kids, the Brotherhood Of Man – “United We Stand�.
“Ah the show goes on, eh? That’s Status Quo and “Marguerita Time�. Back in the 1970s TOTP was introduced by “Whole Lotta Love� by CCS, and this was a band that was led by Alexis Korner who died recently. He was a good man and he’ll be very much missed…�
“Here’s another unforgettable haircut – Alvin Stardust, “My Coo Ca Choo�.
Peel : “Ah memories, such memories, and we apologise if your favourites weren’t there. Actually my favourites weren’t there either.�
Jensen : “He still misses the Osmonds, especially Little Jimmy…�
“At 15, “Move Over Darling� from the newly-wed Tracey Ullman.�
Jensen : “And now something your Rhythm Pals first did a couple of years ago.�
Peel : “You’re not going to tell them about the trusses are you?�
Jensen : “No no no, the Video Top 10, and here’s the first one of the new year…�
“At No.7 it’s “Islands In The Stream�, Kenny Rogers & Dolly Parton. That’s Ken on the right.�
Jensen : “Hey Peely, what’s No.1?�
Peel : “What’s been No.1 since you and I were about that tall?�
Jensen : “Flying Pickets??�
Peel : “Flying Pickets!!�
10/5/84
“It’s been a long time since we last did the programme. In fact there’s been a lot of changes. These days he’s John Peel and I’m Kid Jensen!�
“No.3 in all of our hearts, that’s Queen and “I Want To Break Free� to paint, to grow a silly moustache and to wear my pyjamas in public – the Flying Pickets!�
“39, “Silver� from Echo & The Bunnymen. See you in Rome, lads!�
“At 36, “People Are People�, a considered opinion of Depeche Mode.�
(following the ‘Zoo’ performance of “Automatic�, Peel does his silly dance)
Jensen : “Excuse me John, John, the number’s actually finished!�
Peel : “Oh, that’s a shame…�
“At number No.9 – “Footloose�, Kenny Loggins in a Radio 2 stylee.�
“And still there at No.3 – “I Want To Break Free�, Queen. Crucial!�
“Duran Duran. White boys on port and lemon, lots of ice.�
7/6/84
Peel : “Hello and welcome to another TOTP. Another half hour in the company of attractive young people wearing extraordinary trousers.�
Jensen : “Not only that, but everybody on the programme tonight is live, except of course for the DJs.�
Peel : “Yes, we’re miming I’m afraid, and not awfully well…�
“Only When You Leave, that’s Spandau Ballet, No.5 in the charts and, er, in your hearts (Jensen yawns). Next, blinking modestly in the spotlight it’s Howard Jones. Hit it, Howie!�
Peel : “High Energy, that’s Evelyn Thomas. She’s in the country at the moment you know.�
Jensen : “Of course she’s in the country – she’s on the show!!�
Peel : “Yes, there certainly is that…�
Jensen : “Next up, a duo who I think have modelled themselves on us!�
Peel : “I certainly like to think that that’s true, yes. Still at No.1 – Wham!!�
9/8/84 :
“Hello and welcome to another half hour of the hardest ‘street’ sounds around, like Hazell Dean and Frankie Goes To Hollywood…�
“Tossing & Turning – two things I do inordinately well – Windjammer!�
(after Hazell Dean) “It’s dancing to records like that that enable me to keep my yummy finger� (I assume he means ‘figure’?)
Skinner : “Did you know that Laura Branigan could have been an Olympic standard swimmer?�
Peel : “As bad as that, eh?�
6/9/84
Peel : “Hello and welcome to another TOTP, and I’ve got a bit of an explanation to do at the beginning of this one…�
Long : “No, but I was just going to…�
Peel : “Will you just shut up, will you just be quiet a minute! What happened was that Bucks Fizz last week started their number, and they got to the station…�
Long : “To cut a long story short – Bucks Fizz!�
Long : “Sister Sledge, and they’re on tour at the moment. You can see them in Nottingham tomorrow.�
Peel : “And I’m at the Public Baths, c**t on Saturday.�
Long : “Doing all your hits?�
Peel : “Of course.�
“No.17 – The Smiths and “William, It Were Really Nowt�.
“No.12 – “Master & Servant� – both by Depeche Mode.�
Peel : “That’s Alphaville with their tribute to the legendary Liverpool band, Big In Japan.�
Long : “Where are they now?�
“At No.3 still – “Agadoo�, Black Lace. What a gem!�
Peel : “Our Janice is another graduate of the John Peel school of broadcasting.�
Long : “Thank you very much. Stevie Wonder is No.1!�
Peel : “Well I bet whoever it was that was at the other end of that has hung up by now. That’s Stevie Wonder with the new No.1 record.�
Long (laughing) : “Who’s this?�
Peel : “Don’t ask me!�
Long : “Who are you?�
Brookes : “I’m Bruno Brookes and listen, I want to make it quite clear I’ve got to present this show next week. Can you give me a bit of advice?�
Peel : “Yes, don’t do it like this! This is Elton John playing us out with “Passengers�. Runners up again this year, Elt?�
22/11/84
“That’s a punchy little number, isn’t it? That’s Chicago at No.8. Now we bring on the Newcastle posse – The Kane Gang.�
“That’s the Human League and “Louise� – one of their best songs I think. I mean I know you don’t care what I think, but I thought I’d tell you anyway.�
“At 26, the Human League and “Louise� – I knew her mother.�
“And at No.11, the Pointer Sisters – “I’m So Excited�. No, really!�
3/1/85
“That’s “San Damiano�, Sal Solo and some lads who are here as part of a, kind of TOTP youth training scheme.�
“At 20 it’s good old Shaky – “Teardrops�.
“At 13, one of my favourites – “Do The Conga�, Black Lace.�
“Everything Must Change for Paul Young stayed at No.9. But emphatically, emphatically!�
“We’ve done No.10, we’ve done No.9, now we move inexorably up to No.8 – Tears For Fears!�
“Last time I saw these they were at the Belle in Houghton. Now at No.5 in the charts – The Toy Dolls!�
“Staying at No.3 in our Top 10 rundown, a bit of quality – “We All Stand Together�, Paul McCartney & The Frog Chorus.�
7/3/85
Peel : “Hello, we’re the WestEnders and welcome to another TOTP. Rather special TOTP actually because it’s Shakin’ Stevens’ 50th birthday.�
Long : “No, you’ve got it wrong! It’s his 50th appearance on TOTP!� (that was wrong as well actually as it was only his 29th studio appearance on the show)
“Go West – a brace of likeable Cockneys who want to travel and meet people, and hit them with blunt instruments.�
“At 35, Russ Abbot with Joy Division’s “Atmosphere�.
“At 19, the teen-terrific Killing Joke, “Love Like Blood�.
“Scrumptious Bryan Adams is at 17, “Run To You�.
“At 15 it’s good old Shaky, “Breaking Up My Heart�.
(after David Cassidy) Long : “I’ll have you know that I had him on my bedroom wall.�
Peel : “That seems to indicate a degree of agility I didn’t believe you were capable of, Janice, I must say.�
“Here’s the Commodores partying up to No.3 – “Nightshirt�, sorry “Nightshift�, a little joke for you there.�
“Right, that’s the end of this week’s TOTP. I’m off to see the mighty Fall and we’re going to play you out with Hall & Oates.�
11/4/85
“At 39, here is Foreigner – runners up in the Los Angeles young businessmen of the year competition, 1974.�
Long : “Up to 26 it’s ABC and “Be Near Me�.
Peel : “Not for a bet, dear! At 25, Dream Academy and “Life In A Northern Town�.
Long : “And King at 24, “Won’t You Hold My Hand Now?�
Peel : “Not likely! 23, “Love Is A Battlefield�, Pat Benatar.�
Peel : “And at 21, Power Station – “Some�, Janice, “Like It Hot�.
Long : “Oh yeah!�
Peel : “At 15, “Kiss Me�, Stephen Tin Tin Duffy.�
Long : “Mwah! “The Heat Is On� from Glenn Frey at 14.�
Peel : “You’re an animal! 13, the Cool Notes – “Spend The Night�.
Long : “And at 12 it’s Jermaine Jackson and “Do What You Do�!
Peel : “Oh, later! At 11, former jazz-rocker Nik Kershaw and “Wide Boy�.
“Down to No.4, “Pie Jesu�. Sarah Brightman and Paul Miles, Kingston, Surrey. Why do we have to give his address?�
Peel : “This is our sexual chemistry shot. She’s unquenchable!�
Long : “When are you going to build me a pleasure dome?�
29/8/85
Long : “The wonderful Cure at No.28, “In Between Days�.
Peel : “At 27, the wonderful Go West and “Goodbye Girl�.
Peel : “Phil Collins still at 19, that’s “Take Me Home�.
Long : “Any time, Peelie!�
“Right here’s the good news – Bananarama are back. They’re at No.40 – “Do Not Disturb�.
Peel : “Thompson Twins at No.22. I think I’ll get my hair done like that actually.�
Long : “Like Tom’s?�
Peel : “No, like Alannah’s!�
“At 8, the pulsating sound of Radio 2 – Dire Straits and “Money For Nothing�.
25/12/85
Long : “My husband and I…�
Peel : “Wrong show dear, this is TOTP!�
Long : “Oh, merry Christmas! Welcome to the Christmas Day TOTP. Lots of No.1s, lots of best-sellers…�
Peel : “That sort of thing anyway, this is King!�
“That’s Colonel Abrams on TOTP. You ought to hear him on slow songs, viewers – wonderful. In just a moment, Midge Ure with a former No.1, but right now it’s Phyllis Nelson. This is “Move Closer� – if you dare!�
“Something spiritual for you on a Christmas afternoon – that’s Alison Moyet, “That Ole Devil Called Love�. In just a moment or so we’re going to be seeing Paul-P-P-Paul-Paul Hardcastle, but these are the Eurythmics.�
Peel : “That’s Baltimora with the big one for 1985!�
Long : “And this a big hint, come on (gives him a kiss under the mistletoe), Merry Christmas!�
Peel : “Untrammelled lust, consumers…�
Peel : “Paige, Rush, Dickson – it sounds like a sordid incident in a cheap motel!�
Long : “I wouldn’t know about that!�
Peel : “That’s not what I hear, Janice!�
3/4/86
“Well he didn’t seem to be enjoying himself very much there, did he? That’s George Michael and “When It’s Tomato Picking Time in the Valley I’ll Ketchup With You�, haha, a little humour for you there – I do hope you appreciate it.�
“At 7 - the Sun City boys, Queen and “A Kind Of Magic�.
8/5/86
Long : “Doesn’t this sound like an old Bucks Fizz song? At 22, it’s Van Halen and “Why Can’t This Be Love?�.
Peel : “Sounds even worse than a Bucks Fizz song if you ask me, Janice!�
29/5/86
Peel : “That’s Doctor & The Medics, could be No.1 next week you know Janice. Actually he’s from Liverpool, the Doctor!�
Long : “As we are!�
Peel : “That’s right, another Merseyside double.�
Long : “And Pete Wylie, he’s on the show, he’s from Liverpool. The Real Thing, they’re on the show and they’re from Liverpool. And tonight TOTP – live.�
Peel : “Here’s Robert Palmer – I don’t know where he comes from!�
“At No.21 it’s Nu Shooz, “I Can’t Wait�, in which Evangeline looks inside her coffee machine for terrorists.�
“If that doesn’t make No.1 I’m going to come round and break wind in your kitchen!�
28/8/86
Long : “Now Peelie will tell you everything he knows about Peter Cetera.�
Peel : “Hi fans. Well, Pete, that’s what I call him, used to be in Chicago, and he’s asked for 14 similar offences to be taken into consideration.�
Long : “Gary Davies next week on his own.�
Peel : “Yeah, nobody will work with him!�
20/11/86
“That’s Simple Minds with the most exciting video I’ve seen since (looks at watch) well, since teatime. Mind you, I had a late tea!�
“At No.12 it’s Nick Kamen, building a career based on laundry, “Each Time You Break My Heart�.
“Just when you thought pop music was getting really boring and predictable, along came Bon Jovi!�
5/2/87
“How terribly, terribly moving, that’s Randy Crawford. Now here’s something that’s teen-terrific for dancing, this week’s highest new entry – The Smiths at No.12.�
“Oh so yummy China Crisis at 39, “Best Kept Secret�.
“Mmm, super! That’s Michael Crawford who this week won a Variety Club award. Mind you, so did Mike Smith!�
“George Michael & Aretha Franklin. She can make any old rubbish sound good, and I think she just has!�
thanks Neil
