Hee!
1) Aah oh, okay so why not just say so then. Although you couldn't think of yourself like Buddha, he was huge, mass wise.
2) The question mark isn't at which gender, of course I know that silly, the question mark at what you just did again "I do indeed love Mr. Planet in a totally non-gay way", change that to how I'm seeing this..
non-gay means you straight, so that would then be "I do indeed love Mr. Planet in a totally straight way"..okay, but then why the word choice of non-gay, when gender isn't the question? See what I mean?
Oh Claire, let's have a cup of tea