Strangest SPAM you've ever received?

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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mh
Above the Chemist
Posts: 8122
Joined: 23 Jun 2003, 14:41
Location: A city built on rock 'n' roll

Inspired by the recent "Lamps" one (see the Bin).

As well as the usual willy pills, degrees for sale, bank account notices, solicitors-representing-dead-people-in-Africa, haXXored software and other rubbish, I fairly regularly get emails from a company wanting to sell me stainless steel gates!

What's yours?
If I told them once, I told them a hundred times to put 'Spinal Tap' first and 'Puppet Show' last.
User avatar
christophe
Overbomber
Posts: 3527
Joined: 17 Jan 2004, 09:42
Location: Grinderstreet

I keep getting this mail I should pay my bills :roll: strange
Another Shade of You.
Dark
Underneath the Rock
Posts: 6605
Joined: 27 Oct 2004, 21:26
Location: People's Republic of Glasgow
Contact:

I get very entertainingly-titled ones.. "Become a Sperm-Man with Millions of sperms" seems to be a common one nowadays. :lol:
User avatar
Izzy HaveMercy
The Worlds Greatest Living Belgian
Posts: 8844
Joined: 29 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Long Dark Forties
Contact:

Professional Hotel shoe polishers. :eek:

IZ.
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For Greater Good - Ambient Music for the Masses...
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User avatar
hallucienate
Overbomber
Posts: 4602
Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
Contact:

I get one selling speakers every now and then.
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James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

When I was with AOL (yes, I ken, silly Blastard) I used to get regular mail from a firm that made custom built sceptic tanks, is there something I'm not being told?
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
User avatar
Nic
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1357
Joined: 16 May 2006, 19:00
Location: Sweden

mh wrote: I fairly regularly get emails from a company wanting to sell me stainless steel gates!
Must be one of these then...

Clicky (huge image turned into clicky by markfiend -- if it's too big for my monitor, it's too big for anyone's monitor! )

:wink:
All We Ever Wanted Was Everything
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Dan
Overbomber
Posts: 2014
Joined: 25 Sep 2002, 01:00
Location: Leeds

The strangest emails I've received lately haven't been selling anything and don't contain a url (and no hidden java, html, etc when I look in the headers). I saved the best 2. I'll have to wrap the 2nd one in code tags to preserver the ascii-ness.

Subject: mist-clad Neo-hebraic

certain desirable event, my dear eliza (glancing at her sister and bingley) shall take place. what



Subject: date December th

Code: Select all

7431341   0168011   252274         4             2238564   0167405
   5      6     7   5    6        5 5            0     1   6     5
   5      4     8   8    3       2   0           8     7   4     4
   5      1     3   114683      4     4          3     4   6678047
   7      5     5   4  0       716044434         8     7   5     7
   2      1     6   7   6      0       3   264   0     4   1     5
   7      4331367   5    6     1       5   313   4504424   2227050
User avatar
canon docre
Overbomber
Posts: 2529
Joined: 05 Mar 2005, 21:10
Location: Mother Prussia

I'm still contemplating about the message within this one.
www [dot] rx44 [dot] info

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I told you I read my mythology. But the thing that really disturbs
Put their heads on f*cking pikes in front of the venue for all I care.
User avatar
Maisey
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1870
Joined: 28 Jun 2006, 20:19
Location: Moving like a Parallelogram

I get boring stock options from china I'm afraid. How dull.

Although the subjects are usually quite good, 3 random words grouped together (not unlike a black metal album title) to bypass spam filters. Hedonistic Bottletop underwear, that sort of thing.
Nationalise the f**king lot.
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Izzy HaveMercy
The Worlds Greatest Living Belgian
Posts: 8844
Joined: 29 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Long Dark Forties
Contact:

I received an email which was funny, considering the Sissies are going to play Russia.

"Dear Friends,

Please excuse me for this letter.

My name is Valentin. I'm student and I live with my mother in a small town Kaluga, Russia. My mother cannot see and she receive pension very rare which is not enought even for medications.

I work very hard every day to be able to buy necessities for my mother, but my salary is very small, because my studies still not finished."

etcetera etcetera...

An eager fan trying to cash in some money for his Sisters Moscow ticket? :twisted:

IZ.
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For Greater Good - Ambient Music for the Masses...
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.
User avatar
weebleswobble
Underneath the Rock
Posts: 5875
Joined: 09 Feb 2006, 06:57
Location: The Bat-Milk Cave
Contact:

Image
‎"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
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smiscandlon
Overbomber
Posts: 2595
Joined: 05 Feb 2004, 23:52

Most of the spam I get these days is utter gibberish. I mean, what's the point of something like this?
Quick your client get bogged down with, endless. Has, separate system will dont. Logged in use note that forum, has. Mistakenly listed as supporter amicus.
Lite guideemule, build connects! Allows share other users online much like! Email, whenever this gets updated! Bytesmd hash digital digest top, remember.
Links link us, newsletter privacy copyright or. About contact new march immediate mistakenly.
Privacy copyright or content strictly prohibited sovereign, artists! Client get bogged down with endless. Dvd, regioncss free shrink, links.
Light soulseek bittorrent while avoiding their problems doesnt rely. Will, dont, an account herelost aa, divx xvid!
Lite guideemule build connects to edonkey network, and.
Shrink links link us newsletter, privacy. Bittorrent while avoiding their problems doesnt rely on central. To edonkey network, and is one of best programs? Doesnt, rely on central server. Gt, usenot detailsos support usddate addedjan.
Is one of best programs, available today it! Note that forum has separate system will dont?
Gt usenot detailsos support usddate addedjan last, updatedjan page.
Serverless based name download, date.
Available today it, provides sharing all.
Guideemule build connects to edonkey.
Clean grokster imesh light soulseek.
анархия
User avatar
hallucienate
Overbomber
Posts: 4602
Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
Contact:

smiscandlon wrote:Most of the spam I get these days is utter gibberish. I mean, what's the point of something like this?
Quick your client get bogged down with, endless. Has, separate system will dont. Logged in use note that forum, has. Mistakenly listed as supporter amicus.
Lite guideemule, build connects! Allows share other users online much like! Email, whenever this gets updated! Bytesmd hash digital digest top, remember.
Links link us, newsletter privacy copyright or. About contact new march immediate mistakenly.
Privacy copyright or content strictly prohibited sovereign, artists! Client get bogged down with endless. Dvd, regioncss free shrink, links.
Light soulseek bittorrent while avoiding their problems doesnt rely. Will, dont, an account herelost aa, divx xvid!
Lite guideemule build connects to edonkey network, and.
Shrink links link us newsletter, privacy. Bittorrent while avoiding their problems doesnt rely on central. To edonkey network, and is one of best programs? Doesnt, rely on central server. Gt, usenot detailsos support usddate addedjan.
Is one of best programs, available today it! Note that forum has separate system will dont?
Gt usenot detailsos support usddate addedjan last, updatedjan page.
Serverless based name download, date.
Available today it, provides sharing all.
Guideemule build connects to edonkey.
Clean grokster imesh light soulseek.
There is probably an image somewhere that contains the payload...
User avatar
Norman Hunter
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1870
Joined: 29 Sep 2004, 12:41
Location: Leeds
Contact:

Where I've worked, I've specialized in signing other workmates up for various trade newsletters, mailshots and general tat with a Production Engineering -bias, then watching in glee as umpteen envelopes get delivered to an unknowing victim. I still get letters for Portaloos to this day on a regular basis, a victim of my own making.

That's how bad Production Engineering in the UK can be - no wonder we're lagging behind... :roll:
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BillyBadBreaks
Fat Forgetful Bastard
Posts: 1466
Joined: 17 Sep 2004, 20:57
Location: Was the UK, but now Columbus, Ohio

James Blast wrote:When I was with AOL (yes, I ken, silly Blastard) I used to get regular mail from a firm that made custom built sceptic tanks, is there something I'm not being told?
You are being told my friend, but you just don't get it :lol:
You still think swastikas look cool
The real nazis run your schools
They're coaches, businessmen and cops
In a real fourth reich you'll be the first to go
User avatar
BillyBadBreaks
Fat Forgetful Bastard
Posts: 1466
Joined: 17 Sep 2004, 20:57
Location: Was the UK, but now Columbus, Ohio

I must be getting old as I no longer get spam about male enhancement products just stock trades! :lol:
You still think swastikas look cool
The real nazis run your schools
They're coaches, businessmen and cops
In a real fourth reich you'll be the first to go
User avatar
Doktor Gott
Gonzoid Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 383
Joined: 12 May 2006, 14:18
Location: Stadtkind
Contact:

Either for Christian Family Loans or Black African American singles in my area..

These spammers aren't very good with their demographics I presume..
I give you the finger but you want the whole hand...
------------------------------------------------------

http://www.pbase.com/gottdammerung/galleries
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Pista
Cureboi
Posts: 17624
Joined: 25 Jun 2006, 15:03
Location: Lost In A Forest
Contact:

I occaisionally get messages that tell me about windows enhancements for download.
Does that count as spam, or is it just sh*t?
Cheers.
Steve
Just like the old days

TheCureCommunity
User avatar
bushman*pm
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 875
Joined: 11 Feb 2006, 17:21
Location: THE BLACK HOLE OF LONDON

James Blast wrote:When I was with AOL (yes, I ken, silly Blastard) I used to get regular mail from a firm that made custom built sceptic tanks, is there something I'm not being told?
Shouldn't that be 'Septic Tanks' but then again, i use that as rhyming slang for those morons on the other side of the pond!
:lol:
LAND ROVER: THE BEAST FOUR BY FOUR BY FEAR! KICKS THE ARSE OFF RICEBURNERS!
User avatar
Izzy HaveMercy
The Worlds Greatest Living Belgian
Posts: 8844
Joined: 29 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Long Dark Forties
Contact:

bushman*pm wrote:
James Blast wrote:When I was with AOL (yes, I ken, silly Blastard) I used to get regular mail from a firm that made custom built sceptic tanks, is there something I'm not being told?
Shouldn't that be 'Septic Tanks' but then again, i use that as rhyming slang for those morons on the other side of the pond!
:lol:
Not in James' case no. At one time, he had fifteen of these tanks lined up in his backyard, all deciding whether or not they were gonna take his shit... ;D

IZ.
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For Greater Good - Ambient Music for the Masses...
.
.
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

Izzy HaveMercy wrote:Not in James' case no. At one time, he had fifteen of these tanks lined up in his backyard, all deciding whether or not they were gonna take his shit...
for you, that was good :lol: :lol: :lol:
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
User avatar
Izzy HaveMercy
The Worlds Greatest Living Belgian
Posts: 8844
Joined: 29 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Long Dark Forties
Contact:

James Blast wrote:
Izzy HaveMercy wrote:Not in James' case no. At one time, he had fifteen of these tanks lined up in his backyard, all deciding whether or not they were gonna take his shit...
for you, that was good :lol: :lol: :lol:
Sometimes a gem is hidden in between all the rubbish, Boss :von:

IZ.
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.
For Greater Good - Ambient Music for the Masses...
.
.
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