Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
"Congratulations! You've caught a goth! But how do you know it's really a goth? What if it's a Spooky Kid, Mansonite, or Quantum? Here's a handy test to see if that vision in black really is a goth. If your quarry meets these specifications, be happy (or forlorn, if you will), for you have caught yourself an authentic!
It is sickened by the country-style decor in your kitchen.
It points out the window at all the other goths caught in your rosebushes, and gives you a longwinded speech about how they are NOT goth.
It is NOT goth.
You may not be able to ascertain its gender from physical examination.
It just won't shut up about all those 80s bands.
Ankhs, ankhs everywhere.
If, however, your prey is more similar to these specs, put it back on your rosebushes to starve or be picked up by its mom.
Wearing any Marilyn Manson clothing
Ugly, ugly, FUGLY makeup.
Gives a long explanation of what Goth is, with contradictions all over the place.
Is wearing blue jeans or khakis, or anything from the (shudder) Gap.
Is a girl scout, salesman, or Jehovah's Witness. (Don't put the trap in the front yard, people!)"
The photographs of God I bought have almost faded away
timsinister wrote:It's been done, netgoth linked that crap years ago. Yawn.
Anyways, two years on the streets of the North's demilitarized zone, and I'm ready to take on any so-called Goff Hunter.
Just make sure you've got your Fuckin' Big Goff Homo Boots on
Last edited by scotty on 06 Dec 2006, 18:05, edited 1 time in total.
Being brave is coming home at 2am half drunk, smelling of perfume, climbing into bed, slapping the wife on the arse and saying,"right fatty, you're next!!"
