Crime Fiction Readers Wanted

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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Erudite
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As I intend entering Crème De La Crime's 2007 search for new talent I thought I might try and enlist the help of some outside opinions.

http://www.cremedelacrime.com/search.htm

The requirements are the opening 5000 words of a 70,000 to 80,000 word novel plus a 500 word synopsis, which I hope to have the initial draft of complete by the end of the week.
Anyone who would like to have a read and feels they can offer some honest and constructive criticism should drop me a PM with their e-mail address.
I'm particularly interested in any occurrences of poor sentence structure, incorrect grammar, colloquialisms in the descriptive prose and over exploited clichés.

And if I could crave the moderators indulgence, would you mind making this a sticky for a week or so, as it's likely to disappear off the board otherwise.

Cheers & thanks in advance,

Don
Last edited by Erudite on 09 Jan 2007, 21:24, edited 1 time in total.
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Izzy HaveMercy
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Both the missus and I are avid readers of English Fiction and Fantasy, so we can both give it a go if you want :D

PM sent btw...

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Erudite
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Izzy HaveMercy wrote:Both the missus and I are avid readers of English Fiction and Fantasy, so we can both give it a go if you want :D

PM sent btw...

IZ.
Cheers for that - I'm finding it a bit of a double edged sword - it's difficult to come up with anything entirely original in crime writing and yet you also need to conform to a well trodden formula :|
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Izzy HaveMercy
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Erudite wrote:
Izzy HaveMercy wrote:Both the missus and I are avid readers of English Fiction and Fantasy, so we can both give it a go if you want :D

PM sent btw...

IZ.
Cheers for that - I'm finding it a bit of a double edged sword - it's difficult to come up with anything entirely original in crime writing and yet you also need to conform to a well trodden formula :|
Tried song-writing for a change? ;)

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markfiend
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Erudite wrote:And if I could crave the moderators indulgence, would you mind making this a sticky for a week or so, as it's likely to disappear off the boars otherwise.
Seems fine to me. 8)
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EvilBastard
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I'll give it a squizz - PM incoming.
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smiscandlon
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Crime isn't my usual genre of choice, but I'd be happy to cast a critical eye over it.
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Purple Light
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I like crime & I like writing. I'd be delighted to have a look. 8)
PM on its way...
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Erudite
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Thanks for the response, people!
There should hopefuly be something worth reading by Sunday.
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Big Si
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Aye PM Sent! :wink:
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Erudite
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There should now be a little something in your inboxes.

Enjoy :D (or not :| )
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Big Si
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Read, fully enjoyed, edited and emailed back. :notworthy:

Hope you agree with the adjustments, otherwise I can go and get stuffed! :wink: :D
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Erudite
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Big Si wrote:Read, fully enjoyed, edited and emailed back. :notworthy:

Hope you agree with the adjustments, otherwise I can go and get stuffed! :wink: :D
Thanks for that. :notworthy:

I'll certainly go with some of the mark ups.
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Big Si
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Erudite wrote:
Big Si wrote:Read, fully enjoyed, edited and emailed back. :notworthy:

Hope you agree with the adjustments, otherwise I can go and get stuffed! :wink: :D
Thanks for that. :notworthy:

I'll certainly go with some of the mark ups.
Any chance of reading the rest of the book? :innocent: ;D
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Erudite
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Big Si wrote: Any chance of reading the rest of the book? :innocent: ;D
Aye, give us three months or there abouts and I'll see what I can do. :lol:
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Big Si
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Erudite wrote:
Big Si wrote: Any chance of reading the rest of the book? :innocent: ;D
Aye, give us three months or there abouts and I'll see what I can do. :lol:
:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:
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Izzy HaveMercy
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I did not receive something in me Inboxy thingy...:|

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Big Si
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Izzy HaveMercy wrote:I did not receive something in me Inboxy thingy...:|

IZ.
Would you like me to forward it on for you? :wink:
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Erudite
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Big Si wrote:
Izzy HaveMercy wrote:I did not receive something in me Inboxy thingy...:|

IZ.
Would you like me to forward it on for you? :wink:
Cheers, but it's all sorted out.
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Big Si
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Erudite wrote:
Big Si wrote:
Izzy HaveMercy wrote:I did not receive something in me Inboxy thingy...:|

IZ.
Would you like me to forward it on for you? :wink:
Cheers, but it's all sorted out.
Aye, he's posted on the currently reading thread... :roll:
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Erudite
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Thanks to everybody for their comments and corrections, which were both helpful and appreciated. :notworthy:

Having written a little further, I'm discovering somethings aren't working out. Fortunately, this won't mean too many changes to the opening 5,000 words, but, inevitably, some stuff has to go in the bucket. :roll:

On a positive note, regardless of whether I land a commission or not, I intend on completing the novel.
Progress so far is slow but I should have something of suitable quality ready by early summer. :)

The sci-fi stuff will hopefully be out by then as well.
Providing my would-be publisher gets his act together.
Right now I don't have too much faith in that.
Hopefully, I'll be proved wrong in this case.
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Izzy HaveMercy
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Fingers crossed! ;D

Glad to be of help, BTW ;)

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Big Si
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Erudite wrote:Thanks to everybody for their comments and corrections, which were both helpful and appreciated. :notworthy:

Having written a little further, I'm discovering somethings aren't working out. Fortunately, this won't mean too many changes to the opening 5,000 words, but, inevitably, some stuff has to go in the bucket. :roll:

On a positive note, regardless of whether I land a commission or not, I intend on completing the novel.
Progress so far is slow but I should have something of suitable quality ready by early summer. :)

The sci-fi stuff will hopefully be out by then as well.
Providing my would-be publisher gets his act together.
Right now I don't have too much faith in that.
Hopefully, I'll be proved wrong in this case.
If you can get a fine line between the paranormal activity and the detective stuff you'll have a bestseller :D

Well I'll buy a copy of it! :notworthy:
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Erudite
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Apologies for anyone who was waiting for this - I'm afraid I didn't get the commission - just another infuriatingly positive rejection letter (see below).
If only publishers and literary agents would tell me my work was completely shit I could give up my dreams and learn to love a career in electrical engineering! :wink:
Crème de la Crime Search 2007



Report on Something Wicked by D F Robertson


I would like to thank you for submitting your entry for the Crème de la Crime search and many commiserations on not being selected for the shortlist. Narrowing down the shortlist was not an easy task but unfortunately we were unable to include your novel on it.

It is very clear that you have a good sense of location. Your writing shows a keen eye for local detail and colour as well as a precise feeling for a particular area. You tread the fine line between evoking the landscape and over-burdening the reader with information with great skill and delicacy.

Your dialogue, likewise, is convincing – again giving sufficient local flavour without confusing the reader. This is something that is hard for many authors and I was impressed by your handling of it.

Originality is something that all authors strive for. I am sorry to say that a simple search on amazon.co.uk has revealed a number of novels with the title ‘Something Wicked’ – including a number that are specifically in the crime genre. While I appreciate the reference, I would suggest that you seek another title for your work to help it stand out in a very crowded field.

I also felt that your plotting, though well-thought out, is not terribly original. The linking of the occult with schoolgirls and rock music strikes me as ground that has already been covered by other authors.

While your writing is fluent and readable, it does not yet have the spark that makes it immediately appealing to a crime publisher. We are all looking for something new and different – and on this occasion, I feel that you have not quite reached that level.

However, I would encourage you to continue to explore the genre and see where it leads you.

ST June 2007

To cut to the chase - I got about 35,000 words of the initial draft done before placing this one on the back burner.
It's probably full of typos and bits of it doubtless fail to gel due to changes in ideas/direction. But if any one wants to have a scan, drop me a PM.

Have since finished the first draft of a 9th Century Norse fantasy novel, but reckon with a different, and hopefully rather less pedestrian plot, I will pick this up again at some point next year.

In other words, I am working on this inter alia - knew you'd be pleased! :P
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James Blast
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Don, I would sign up for this, but I am the slowest reader in the world, it took me two months to read Clive James' last autobiog and I love his books. I ken whit a top chap you are and I'd say Feck 'Em! for paragraphs 4 to 6.

Never get out the boat Don! :D
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