The Average Bloke Spends....

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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scotty
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.....£97 on Valentines Day :eek:

Right Guys, how are YOU going to spend?
Being brave is coming home at 2am half drunk, smelling of perfume, climbing into bed, slapping the wife on the arse and saying,"right fatty, you're next!!"
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weebleswobble
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Taking the be-atch oot for drinkies-presently nae time tae buy a card


It's all a bag o' sh*te innit?
‎"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
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Pat
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I bought Anne a nice (expensive) ring for Xmas...I'm in credit for years.
Although I might go down ASDA buy a card for £2 and stick a lottery ticket in it. She's a lucky girl. :lol:
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hallucienate
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Weather permitting we're going up here with some wine to watch the sunset.
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emilystrange
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i had all mine yesterday. am still full from my dinner out.
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
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aims
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If I'm too shy, it'll be nothing.

If I'm not too shy, it'll still be nothing.

A scrawled note is so much more personal a method of testing the water than a glossy mass produced card n.n
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Dark
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Celebrating the day of the year when [allegedly] a Christian was martyred, and anonymous messages of love are "cute", not "stalking"?

Wake me up when the overpriced roses, booze and chocolates are back to normal. :roll:

Cynical, moi? :lol:

I got a valentine in the post today. I knew it when my mum handed me a red envelope and remarked that the postmark was from Yorkshire. Experience says it's my sister. Sympathy cards are worse that no cards, IMHO. :|
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EvilBastard
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[quote="scotty"].....£97 on Valentines Day :eek:

...with the caveat being that all the ladies on HL are far too discerning and have too much class to be seen with an "average" bloke... :innocent:
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
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Brideoffrankenstein
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*Looks forward to the remaining £90 to make an appearance*
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mh
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It's all a total money racket anyway, isn't it?
If I told them once, I told them a hundred times to put 'Spinal Tap' first and 'Puppet Show' last.
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aims
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Dark wrote:Celebrating the day of the year when [allegedly] a Christian was martyred, and anonymous messages of love are "cute", not "stalking"?
Following an interesting conversation today, I have carte blanche from a rather gorgeous individual to "stalk" them. In their opinion, it only becomes stalking when you're caught :innocent::lol:
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emilystrange
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EvilBastard wrote:
scotty wrote:.....£97 on Valentines Day :eek:

...with the caveat being that all the ladies on HL are far too discerning and have too much class to be seen with an "average" bloke... :innocent:
indeed. :twisted:
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
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canon docre
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EvilBastard wrote: ...with the caveat being that all the ladies on HL are far too discerning and have too much class to be seen with an "average" bloke... :innocent:
.... or with any bloke for that matter.... Image

:wink:
Put their heads on f*cking pikes in front of the venue for all I care.
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Planet Dave
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£97!!?? What? In a lifetime?

:twisted:
'What a heavy load Einstein must have had. Morons everywhere.'
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Thea
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If my bloke spent that much on V-day I'd slap him. what sort of pillock spends that sort of cash... Really!
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SomeKindOfStranger
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d00mw0lf wrote:If my bloke spent that much on V-day I'd slap him. what sort of pillock spends that sort of cash... Really!
I like the way you think! 8)
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Gripper
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scotty wrote:.....£97 on Valentines Day :eek:

Right Guys, how are YOU going to spend?
'Average' blokes obviously seem to need to try harder than me. :roll:
My car's faster than your mum, but not as dirty.
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canon docre
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SomeKindOfStranger wrote:
d00mw0lf wrote:If my bloke spent that much on V-day I'd slap him. what sort of pillock spends that sort of cash... Really!
I like the way you think! 8)
there you see Doomie, you spoiled it for the rest of us.
Put their heads on f*cking pikes in front of the venue for all I care.
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Big Si
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<----- Confirmed Bachelor, the £97 gets spent on myself :twisted: :lol:
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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timsinister
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A single rose for tomorrow, plastic too. It's not cheap, it's MEANINGFUL 'cos it lasts, see. Oh, and a meal on the weekend.

Hardly going overboard, 'cuz like the Professor, she has specified a low-key affair. Fine by me and my wallet. :D

How's about you, Scotty? Considering how nice you are to Mags normally, what does she get at Valentines? A kiss before a gobful of abuse? :twisted:

:innocent:
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weebleswobble
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timsinister wrote: Oh, and a meal on the weekend.
Not dodging out on us for luurve are you? :lol:
&#8206;"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
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Zuma
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timsinister wrote:A single rose for tomorrow, plastic too. It's not cheap, it's MEANINGFUL 'cos it lasts, see. Oh, and a meal on the weekend.

Hardly going overboard, 'cuz like the Professor, she has specified a low-key affair. Fine by me and my wallet. :D

How's about you, Scotty? Considering how nice you are to Mags normally, what does she get at Valentines? A kiss before a gobful of abuse? :twisted:

:innocent:
But what do you do with the bones? (ancient Moorcroft reference)
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boudicca
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I don't think my Dad's spent that much on my Mum altogether in 30 years of marriage :lol:
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
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eotunun
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I see all the girls staring at this headline and her 2£ worth of flowers in her hand thinking "You lucky bitch, somewhere out there.."
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Andrew S
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scotty wrote:
Right Guys, how are YOU going to spend?
Whatever the cheapest box of After Eights I can find costs.
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