KILLED by the strain of trying to understand the Hutton inquiry, a man stood before St Peter at the Pearly Gates. "What's that wall of clocks up there?" the man asked.
"Lie-clocks," St Peter answered, explaining everyone has a lie-clock, the hands moving with each untruth uttered.
"Whose clock is that?" said the man. "Mother Teresa's," said St Peter. "She never lied, so the hands didn't move."
The man pointed at another clock. "Abraham Lincoln's," replied St Peter. "The hands moved twice, as Abe only lied twice in his life."
Puzzled, the man inquired where Tony Blair's clock was.
"Tony Blair's clock is in our kitchen," said St Peter. "It's a brilliant ceiling fan."
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