actual comments from his patients, made while he was performing colon exams:
"Take it easy, Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone before."
"Find Amelia Earhart yet?"
"Can you hear me NOW?"
"Are we there yet?
?Are we there yet? ?Are we there yet?""You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."
"Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"
"You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out; ya do the Hokey Cokey..."
"Now I know how a Muppet feels!"
"If your hand doesn't fit, you must acquit!"
"Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."
"You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"
"Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that in fact, my head is NOT up there?
