What the bible-thumping sepos get up to when the lights are off
Safer for work than you might think - all in all, a pretty disturbing article (not least for the references to "saucy time" ), but the comments section is worth a read and a giggle.
Somewhat troubling
- EvilBastard
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"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
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- James Blast
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watermelon sex is great, don't knock what you haven't tried
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
- James Blast
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that's just plain weird and a bit bleaugch!
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
- Izzy HaveMercy
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You mean yer into us 3?LouLou wrote:naaah, watermelon's aren't my thing. i'm a cantaloupe person meself
IZ.
- 7anthea7
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Ah, that ancient Middle Eastern wisdom:LouLou wrote:I buy my husband a watermelon every week.
'A woman for procreation, a boy for recreation, and a melon for sheer delight.'
Who can begin conventional amiability the first thing in the morning?
It is the hour of savage instincts and natural tendencies.
--Elizabeth von Arnim
It is the hour of savage instincts and natural tendencies.
--Elizabeth von Arnim
- 7anthea7
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...the dark night of the soul that is the long-term relationship...
Although I suppose it would be with either of them...
Who can begin conventional amiability the first thing in the morning?
It is the hour of savage instincts and natural tendencies.
--Elizabeth von Arnim
It is the hour of savage instincts and natural tendencies.
--Elizabeth von Arnim
- EvilBastard
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You just want to make sure you don't put it in the microwave for too long, mind - the effect of super-heated melon juice on one's todger causes some interested looks and smirks in A&E (or so I've been led to understand)7anthea7 wrote:Ah, that ancient Middle Eastern wisdom:LouLou wrote:I buy my husband a watermelon every week.
'A woman for procreation, a boy for recreation, and a melon for sheer delight.'
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
Hank Moody
7anthea7 wrote:Ah, that ancient Middle Eastern wisdom:LouLou wrote:I buy my husband a watermelon every week.
'A woman for procreation, a boy for recreation, and a melon for sheer delight.'
it was time they left that poor little goat alone!
- silentNate
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How do you know that? Personal experience?EvilBastard wrote:You just want to make sure you don't put it in the microwave for too long, mind - the effect of super-heated melon juice on one's todger causes some interested looks and smirks in A&E (or so I've been led to understand)7anthea7 wrote:Ah, that ancient Middle Eastern wisdom:LouLou wrote:
'A woman for procreation, a boy for recreation, and a melon for sheer delight.'
I had a face on the mirror
I had a hand on the gun
I had a place in the sun and a ticket to Syria
I had a hand on the gun
I had a place in the sun and a ticket to Syria
- James Blast
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given up on the chili helmet then?EvilBastard wrote:the effect of super-heated melon juice on one's todger causes some interested looks and smirks in A&E
I'd have thought melon juice woulda bin a 'salve' to a chili helmet too, hmm...
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
- EvilBastard
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It would if it was cold - the problem is that the natural sugars in the melon juice retain the heat, and when applied to naked skin have roughly the same effect as white phosphorous does - it sticks, it burns, and it keeps on burning, and because the sugar acts as an adhesive it's very difficult to wash it off (as my friends who work in the medical profession are keen to point out, frequently using visual aids in the form of photographs taken for "teaching purposes" - there's some weird people out there doing even weirder things to each other).James Blast wrote:given up on the chili helmet then?EvilBastard wrote:the effect of super-heated melon juice on one's todger causes some interested looks and smirks in A&E
I'd have thought melon juice woulda bin a 'salve' to a chili helmet too, hmm...
And yes, I've given up on the chili helmet (jesus, you just won't let forget about that, will you?:lol: ) - 1 tiny drop of the juice of a scotch bonnet pepper (that 350,000 scovilles to the uninitiated) down your jap's eye makes syphillis almost pleasant. Quick tip: having made yourself a belting chili, refrain from being intimate with yourself or anyone else for about 72 hours to avoid the risk of 3rd degree burns to sensitive flesh. You'll thank me in the morning.
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
Hank Moody
- silentNate
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I was once blinded for almost half-an-hour when I managed to get chillies in both eyes. Not recommendedEvilBastard wrote:Quick tip: having made yourself a belting chili, refrain from being intimate with yourself or anyone else for about 72 hours to avoid the risk of 3rd degree burns to sensitive flesh. You'll thank me in the morning.
I had a face on the mirror
I had a hand on the gun
I had a place in the sun and a ticket to Syria
I had a hand on the gun
I had a place in the sun and a ticket to Syria
Thanks for the warning but 20 years too late I like my chilli hot, but I once added several Scotch Bonnets to mine in ignorant bliss. After being unable to finish my chilli that night (unheard of till then), I put the remains in the freezer (where it remained till I moved out a year later) and decided on a quiet night in. Given the results, I'm assuming that the contents of the freezer ended up burning a hole all the way to AustraliaEvilBastard wrote:1 tiny drop of the juice of a scotch bonnet pepper (that 350,000 scovilles to the uninitiated) down your jap's eye makes syphillis almost pleasant. Quick tip: having made yourself a belting chili, refrain from being intimate with yourself or anyone else for about 72 hours to avoid the risk of 3rd degree burns to sensitive flesh. You'll thank me in the morning.
RIP Dale: 1994 - 2009