LOST TRIBE OF “THE CULT� DRUMMERS FOUND

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
Post Reply
User avatar
Maisey
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1870
Joined: 28 Jun 2006, 20:19
Location: Moving like a Parallelogram

Scientists in the South Pacific have discovered an uncharted island inhabited entirely by drummers from eighties gothic rock band THE CULT.

It has long been a mystery to scientists as to the strange disapearences of THE CULT’s drummers, so much so that THE CULT’s drum stool had become known as THE ASTBURY TRIANGLE.

Since 1982 THE CULT have lost, on average, four drummers annually in mysterious circumstances.

Finally the mystery appears to have been solved. The Uncharted island, now known as Preston-Warner lies 200 miles west of Bali Ha'i in the inhospitable South Pacific Ocean.

The tribe is believed to have evolved from a bizarre and miraculous process whereby a single sex can reproduce, like what the dinosaurs do in JURASSIC PARK.

In a DISCOVERY CHANNEL documentary to be broadcast next month, the lost tribe of drummers known as the BRZEZICKI are seen living in their elevated huts known as “Rizers�, seeking out food known as “Riders� and worshipping their primitive Gods, “Paradiddle� and “Tomtom�.

When asked about the discovery, THE CULTs guitarist BILLY DUFFY commented “It’s all Astbury’s fault, the bastard!�

IAN ASTBURY, THE CULT’s lead singer was unavailable for comment, the bastard.

READ MORE HERE
Nationalise the f**king lot.
Top
User avatar
BillyBadBreaks
Fat Forgetful Bastard
Posts: 1466
Joined: 17 Sep 2004, 20:57
Location: Was the UK, but now Columbus, Ohio

:notworthy: :lol: :notworthy:
You still think swastikas look cool
The real nazis run your schools
They're coaches, businessmen and cops
In a real fourth reich you'll be the first to go
Top
User avatar
Norman Hunter
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1870
Joined: 29 Sep 2004, 12:41
Location: Leeds
Contact:
Contact Norman Hunter

Leave us drummers alone - again!

What about the countless bassists? :wink:
Four strings good, six strings bad
Top
User avatar
Maisey
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1870
Joined: 28 Jun 2006, 20:19
Location: Moving like a Parallelogram

You played drums for The Cult as well?! Blimey.
Nationalise the f**king lot.
Top
User avatar
SteBacchus
Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 249
Joined: 29 Aug 2009, 21:55
Location: Bolton

LOL :D :notworthy: :lol:
I don't doubt and I don't take direction....
Top
User avatar
Norman Hunter
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1870
Joined: 29 Sep 2004, 12:41
Location: Leeds
Contact:
Contact Norman Hunter

Maisey wrote:You played drums for The Cult as well?! Blimey.
Every other f**ker has.

"Love" and "Electric" played a big part in my learning. Nice, steady-away tracks, nowt too complicated.
Four strings good, six strings bad
Top
Post Reply

Return to “General Chat”