The all new NEWSWORTHY thread

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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markfiend
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Pista wrote:Swiving hell, the swivers!

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/03/27 ... led_fbomb/
Prima facie first amendment case.
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
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Pista
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You're the director of a local YMCA and want to perform a safety drill. Do you a) sound the fire alarm and exit calmly, b) call a meeting, c) run wildly through the building posing as an armed, masked intruder?

http://www.wthr.com/story/17316635/avon ... -drill-911

:lol:
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Pista
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& the short range weather forecast shows a chance of showers & bears.
Wait. What??

http://deadspin.com/5904543/tonights-we ... socialflow

:lol:
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markfiend
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There's always a chance of bears.
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
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Pista
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markfiend wrote:There's always a chance of bears.
:lol: :lol:
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Pista
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Come & get your Queen's knickers now. Only £5.99. a pair.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2012/05/08 ... ter_error/

:lol:
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Pista
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Inventory of The Plough's lost property box.
A handbag (brown)
A set of pipe cleaners
A pipe
Several lighters
A prime minister's daughter
A set of keys

Wait! What?


http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politic ... n-pub.html

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EvilBastard
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German insurance firm organised sex party for salesmen :lol: :eek: :lol:
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
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DeWinter
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The internet sometimes gets it right.
Bastard teens drive pensioner bus monitor to tears with their abuse, including the line "your house would have nothing worth stealing".
Well, apart from the rather large sum of money she's got thanks to you all.
http://usnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/ ... video?lite

Hope their next bus monitor is a child molester.
"Vengeance. Justice. Fire and blood.."
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Pista
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Cor blimey guv'nor!
Cockneys are dying out
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-18570802
the researchers suggest no true Cockneys may ever be born again
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Being645
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"Sisters Chat" in Jordan ... :eek: :eek: :eek: ... hell ... :lol: ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFyqKzu2T1Y

for some more explanation ...
http://www.timesofisrael.com/jordanian- ... tv-debate/
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Pista
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Deep fried Mars bars aren't healthy!!

http://www.cbc.ca/news/yourcommunity/20 ... althy.html

Who'd have guessed??
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lazarus corporation
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Best. Letter. Ever.
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Pista
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lazarus corporation wrote:Best. Letter. Ever.
Beautiful!
(you may want to hire an intern to help you with the longer words):
:notworthy: :notworthy:
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Pista
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Karaoke party gets the X Factor treatment

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstop ... nging.html

:notworthy: :notworthy:
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markfiend
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lazarus corporation wrote:Best. Letter. Ever.
I'd advise against reading the comments... :urff:
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
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czuczu
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markfiend wrote:
lazarus corporation wrote:Best. Letter. Ever.
I'd advise against reading the comments... :urff:
Never read the bottom half of the internet.
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Pista
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Well, well.
So zombies have been around longer than we thought.

http://www.mnn.com/lifestyle/arts-cultu ... apocalypse

:eek:
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Pista
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Naughty behaviour detected in seat 27F.
Send in the ninjas!!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-19622445
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Pista
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Drunk thief who stole a ferry while proclaiming herself to be Jack Sparrow jailed. With mugshot that shows she may have had a point

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-devon-19661144

:lol: :notworthy: :lol:
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Pista
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she used the class B drug, which gives users 'rushes' and is a 'performance enhancer', to help her clean her house faster.
Sounds like a plausible defence if you ask me. :lol:


http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstop ... olice.html
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Silver_Owl
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Pista wrote:
she used the class B drug, which gives users 'rushes' and is a 'performance enhancer', to help her clean her house faster.
Sounds like a plausible defence if you ask me. :lol:


http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstop ... olice.html
Officers also found 35.6g of cannabis in the home, worth around £150. Hedges told them it helped her to 'come down' after doing cleaning and DIY.


Fantastic. :lol:
We forgive as we forget
As the day is long.
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Silver_Owl
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Jimmy Saville on Have I Got News For You
We forgive as we forget
As the day is long.
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markfiend
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Jesus. :eek:
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
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Silver_Owl
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markfiend wrote:
Jesus. :eek:
There seems to be some degree of debate as to whether it's fake or not...Difficult to say.
We forgive as we forget
As the day is long.
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