I am waging war

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
Post Reply
User avatar
Debaser
Overbomber
Posts: 4660
Joined: 30 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Lincoln. UK

against ants - little black fekkers! I loathe, hate and despise them. They have NO use whatsoever - do they pollinate anything? do they buggery!

I am sat on the sofa with caustic evilness in a spray can. For those who are wearing goggles and protective clothing I have the ulimate weapon of choice - a flip flop.

Anyone know where I can buy an industrial size can of Agent Orange?
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else
Top
User avatar
BeeBeeOh
Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 121
Joined: 08 Jul 2011, 18:42
Location: Budapest, Hungary

Try this : http://www.krogerkrazy.com/2012/04/1-00 ... t-walmart/

A few years ago our kitchen was invaded by hoards of ants, they came out of the walls, and only these baits worked. Good luck!
I have just as much of a dark side as the next person.
Top
User avatar
stufarq
Popweazle Piddlepoop
Posts: 3209
Joined: 19 Jan 2008, 17:09
Location: my own imagination

Debaser wrote:They have NO use whatsoever - do they pollinate anything? do they buggery!
They help turn the soil, they consume dead plant matter, they are a food source for many animals and, as predators, they keep some species in check, thus balancing the ecosystem. As long as their own numbers are kept in check they are classed as important environmental engineers.

You did ask. Now go and say sorry to each and every one of them.
Top
User avatar
DOZMEISTER
Road Kill
Posts: 81
Joined: 26 Apr 2006, 15:45
Location: Staffordshire

And they are the strongest creature in the world are they not?
Top
Bartek
Underneath the Rock
Posts: 6141
Joined: 17 Sep 2005, 10:47

Strongest creature on earth is Lemmy. Fact!
Top
User avatar
SteBacchus
Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 249
Joined: 29 Aug 2009, 21:55
Location: Bolton

Bartek wrote:Strongest creature on earth is Lemmy. Fact!
:notworthy:
I don't doubt and I don't take direction....
Top
User avatar
Debaser
Overbomber
Posts: 4660
Joined: 30 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Lincoln. UK

stufarq wrote: As long as their own numbers are kept in check
MWWWAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAA :twisted:
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else
Top
User avatar
Debaser
Overbomber
Posts: 4660
Joined: 30 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Lincoln. UK

stufarq wrote: they are a food source for many animals .
Lincoln is not known for it's native anteater variety :innocent:
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else
Top
User avatar
bangles
Gonzoid Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 492
Joined: 16 Oct 2006, 10:05
Location: in the garden... growing potatos by the score

Don't thread on an Ant - he's done nothing to you!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPjfD8ulnpw

Beware the Ant Invasion

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KNT3NHrCR8
Asperum Aestimate Fimi Aliquid Hodie
Top
User avatar
EvilBastard
Overbomber
Posts: 3934
Joined: 01 Feb 2006, 17:48
Location: Where the Ruined Tower shouts

Debaser wrote:
stufarq wrote: they are a food source for many animals .
Lincoln is not known for it's native anteater variety :innocent:
And you know why? Because eco-terrorists like you have systematically eradicated the anteaters' primary source of food. Who's to say that if you and your ilk had not been so hell-bent on destroying the ants then Lincoln would not have a flourishing anteater population? For shame, sir - for shame!
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
Top
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:
Contact markfiend

I think you mean ma'am not sir...

Anyhoo, I have a slug problem. Bastards are eating my potato crop. :evil:
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
Top
User avatar
stufarq
Popweazle Piddlepoop
Posts: 3209
Joined: 19 Jan 2008, 17:09
Location: my own imagination

DOZMEISTER wrote:And they are the strongest creature in the world are they not?
Have you ever seen one try to lift an elephant? Strongest relative to their size perhaps but most animals are stronger than an ant. Even Nick Clegg.
Debaser wrote:
stufarq wrote: they are a food source for many animals .
Lincoln is not known for it's native anteater variety :innocent:
No but it does have birds. And hedgehogs. And does Heston Blumenthal have a restaurant there?
Top
User avatar
Debaser
Overbomber
Posts: 4660
Joined: 30 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Lincoln. UK

stufarq wrote: No but it does have birds.
If you used the 'search function' :lol: you could look up a thread which was something along the lines of things that you hate. You would find that Debaser hates

Birds - flappy fekkers
Frogs - jumpy fekkers
and
Ants - little black fekkers



As for hedgehogs, they can eat slugs instead.
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else
Top
User avatar
stufarq
Popweazle Piddlepoop
Posts: 3209
Joined: 19 Jan 2008, 17:09
Location: my own imagination

Debaser wrote:
stufarq wrote: No but it does have birds.
If you used the 'search function' :lol: you could look up a thread which was something along the lines of things that you hate. You would find that Debaser hates

Birds - flappy fekkers
Frogs - jumpy fekkers
and
Ants - little black fekkers



As for hedgehogs, they can eat slugs instead.
Yeah but they keep the ants down. Thought that was what you wanted.
Top
Pat
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1358
Joined: 19 Jun 2005, 22:19

I remember seeing this when I was very young
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=fv ... 8xSo2MEPzQ
It was on the news I think. This is what happens if you don't kill ants as quickly as you can.


or this even
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=en ... 29uoQ&NR=1
Top
User avatar
Debaser
Overbomber
Posts: 4660
Joined: 30 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Lincoln. UK

Pat wrote:I remember seeing this when I was very young
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=fv ... 8xSo2MEPzQ
It was on the news I think. This is what happens if you don't kill ants as quickly as you can.


or this even
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=en ... 29uoQ&NR=1
'Zakkerly
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else
Top
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:
Contact markfiend

I'll just leave this here...
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
Top
User avatar
stufarq
Popweazle Piddlepoop
Posts: 3209
Joined: 19 Jan 2008, 17:09
Location: my own imagination

Debaser wrote:
Pat wrote:I remember seeing this when I was very young
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=fv ... 8xSo2MEPzQ
It was on the news I think. This is what happens if you don't kill ants as quickly as you can.


or this even
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=en ... 29uoQ&NR=1
'Zakkerly
Do you happen to live in a nuclear testing zone? if you do, might I suggest that, rather than concentrating on killing the ants, you get the f**k out of there and buy a house somewhere less dangerous? Oh, and you're probably gonna need chemo.
Top
User avatar
Debaser
Overbomber
Posts: 4660
Joined: 30 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Lincoln. UK

stufarq wrote: Do you happen to live in a nuclear testing zone? if you do, might I suggest that, rather than concentrating on killing the ants, you get the f**k out of there and buy a house somewhere less dangerous? Oh, and you're probably gonna need chemo.
OOOh no. I remember the tv campaign, we were most certainly advised to 'STAY IN YOUR HOME'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2wVhbMhHv4
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else
Top
User avatar
stufarq
Popweazle Piddlepoop
Posts: 3209
Joined: 19 Jan 2008, 17:09
Location: my own imagination

The TV campaign about the giant ants? Or the TV campaign about how to survive a nuclear attack, which included advice such as putting duck tape on the windows? Yeah, that'll work.
Any more of that and we'll be round your front door with the quick-setting whitewash and the shaved monkey.
Top
User avatar
million voices
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1005
Joined: 10 May 2006, 22:31
Location: The Ballrooms Of Mars

Don't underestimate the power of advertising

Do you know of anybody who has been attacked by an irradiated giant ant?

There you go then.
Well you must know something
'Cos we're dying of admiration here
Mastering obscure alternatives
Top
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:
Contact markfiend

Heh you sound like Darth Vader. "Do not underestimate the power of the dark side."
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
Top
User avatar
stufarq
Popweazle Piddlepoop
Posts: 3209
Joined: 19 Jan 2008, 17:09
Location: my own imagination

million voices wrote:Don't underestimate the power of advertising

Do you know of anybody who has been attacked by an irradiated giant ant?

There you go then.
Are you saying that advertising persuaded irradiated giant ants not to attack?Because if you are then I think you may be overestimating their ability to work the TV.
Top
User avatar
million voices
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1005
Joined: 10 May 2006, 22:31
Location: The Ballrooms Of Mars

sturfaq - the tv was already on they just noticed the advert whilst passing. It was a summer's day the window was open.

markfiend - with yoda flogging vodafone there has already been a link established between marketing and the "force"
Well you must know something
'Cos we're dying of admiration here
Mastering obscure alternatives
Top
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:
Contact markfiend

million voices wrote:markfiend - with yoda flogging vodafone there has already been a link established between marketing and the "force"
True
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
Top
Post Reply

Return to “General Chat”