10 subjects songwriters should avoid. I bet there's more eh?

[Pista]

I posted this on Fark today & the ensuing thread was pretty funny & thought it'd be an interesting discussion.

Here's the article

What glaring omissions are there?
One answer I particularly liked was

How cities are constructed using a form of music.

[mh]

How cities are constructed using a form of music.

Unfortunately I would love to see the Sisters do a version of that. In Leeds. I suspect that I am probably alone in this perversion.

One for the "endangered animals" bag: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRQehI77oIY

[EmmaPeelWannaBe]

Surely an exception can be made for threatened species?

[EvilBastard]

I've been wracking my brains and cannot find a single reference to the gold standard/Bretton Woods, the exchange rate mechanism, or why some people don't understand that unless explicitly stated revolving doors require that the user pushes the effing door in order to pass from one side to the other, rather than hoping that some other poor effer will push it for them in any of the items in my record collection.

I feel that this is a dreadful oversight - surely Pulp could have recorded, "Push, You Fucker, Push" as a B-side to Common People? Wouldn't a blistering attack on ERM have been in keeping with Hawkwind's "It Is The Business Of The Future To Be Dangerous"?

[Dan]

In defence of The Cranberries' "Zombie", the IRA declared a ceasefire three weeks before the single was even released, possibly making it the most effective political song ever.

[Microcosmia]

I would have thought the inadequacies of your record company would once have been an attractive topic for

I think any lyrics asking a hypothetical lady if your chosen trade would be a factor in her agreeing to have your baby are best avoided.

I would imagine Brexit would be a risky subject too.

[EvilBastard]

In defence of The Cranberries' "Zombie", the IRA declared a ceasefire three weeks before the single was even released, possibly making it the most effective political song ever.

If memory serves...

We, the Army Council of the Irish Republican Army, agree that all soldiers will lay down their arms at midnight on the 20th day of July, conditional upon that tin-eared group of bastards The Cranberries not releasing another single. Jaysus but have ye heard these fockers? I'd sooner give up any and all claim to the 6 Counties than have to listen to these people massacre their way through another "political song". As if fockin' Bono wasn't bad enough, now we've got Runrig's bastard offspring fockin' their way into the national consciousness and pollutin' the brains of young Irish catholics. Ferfocksake, that's our job.

So, we'll stop killing and shooting and kneecapping with bombs and bullets if those bastards stop doing so with music. We think it's a fair trade.

Slainte

Army Council of the IRA

PS Any Irish bands since The Undertones have been shoite

[Pista]

I really think HMHB cornered the market in this.
& won every time

[Bartek]

I love Teh Guardian, i read it everyday. And everyday i see on their website at least one article like this. I guess it's signum temporis, when, even that good newspaper have to (want to?) publish such low-level clickbaits.

How about list of ten topics that journalists should avoid?

[stufarq]

If the article was actually funny, I might have some sympathy, but saying musicians shouldn't voice their opinions on big issues, or that being wealthy invalidates any opinion on poverty or homelessness is just mean-spirited. And if a song's well-written, then the subject can't make it a bad song. I can think of great songs on most of those subjects - including at least one on their list.

It's probably true that rich people complaining about paying tax isn't particularly appealing, but neither is the press complaining about musicians criticising journalists!

But in the spirit of the thread, I'd be grateful if songwriters would refrain from writing on the subject of what inarticulate animals might say, or being Jenny from the block.

And while we're at it, there is no song that can't be made worse by the addition of a rap.

[eastmidswhizzkid]

menstruation -especially not by male songwriters moaning about hormonal women.
male erctile dysfunction (a guaranteed flop! sorry)
really really likeing the smell of your own arse-sweat
condiments.
how much you like your job.
sky box sets.
alton towers
overwhelming urge to stick your dick in your boss's wife
beans.
colonic irrigation.
pissing in the bath.
joey deacon

[Being645]

sky box sets fit perfectly in this selection ... ... ...