Election Time Is Here

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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Do you vote for Corpy?

Poll ended at 24 Feb 2004, 02:14

Yes, only because it will guarantee me future kickbacks (it will)
13
93%
No, I'd rather post what I'm currently listening to than ensure Heartland's continued success (losers)
1
7%
 
Total votes: 14
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Yes, dear Heartlanders, it's time to sharpen your number two pencils and get down to your local voting stations, because it's your civil duty to make myheartland.co.uk a better place through passive political participation, i.e. democracy.

At this point I'm sure you're thinking, but why should I vote for CorpPunk as Heartland's new Goodwill Ambassador?

My qualifications, for those of you who haven't already seen--I mean, don't already know them, are apparent and abundant (ahem):

1. I'm nice.

2. I don't start my new job for another week so I have a lot of time on my hands and I'm kinda bored.

3. I'm completely willing to return to Leeds soley to find Eldritch and beat him mercilessly until I obtain a valid contract--signed in his blood--stating he will record and release a full album which will be available at no cost to certifiable Heartland members. What do I ask from you to complete this service? Nothing. Hell, I'd enjoy it!

4. I'm not crazy, and I'll prove it after I'm elected.

5 (and most importantly). I have never, ever foresaken Heartland for any other forum, which is far more than I can say of certain members here who shall remain nameless as I've no wish to shame my compatriots *cough*Big Si*cough*.

Vote for CorpPunk: 'I don't moderate, I mediate!'
Last edited by CorpPunk on 24 Feb 2004, 20:55, edited 1 time in total.
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The Green Lantern
Gonzoid Amphetamine Filth
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Joined: 07 Jan 2003, 10:47
Location: Matt's house boat

I think there should be more options in the poll/vote. Like the ones they had in Florida.
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hallucienate
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got my vote. I gotta warm up, national elections are taking place on the 14th April!
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Padstar
Utterly Bastard Smurph
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Despotic leader if i ever saw one.... then again, America seems good at that at the moment!

;)

Love you though Punky, and quite frankly if you want to subjugate me.... im up for a bit :)

you got my vote!

Paddy
Still playing guitar - sometimes weird shaped ones.
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paint it black
Black, black, black & even blacker
Posts: 4966
Joined: 11 Jul 2002, 01:00

what's hidden in the closet?

insider trading/ drugs/ groupies/ secret abortions/ porno flicks/ cigars...

I expect a yes to at least 33% of that before you get my vote of confidence :twisted:
Goths have feelings too
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Candover Premiere
Road Kill
Posts: 99
Joined: 29 Jan 2004, 17:06

Yes, because you are the nicest and most beautiful girl on the forum.
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Mrs RicheyJames
Overbomber
Posts: 4128
Joined: 10 Feb 2003, 00:33
Location: Rick Astley's house. Trying to find out why he chooses to look like Timsinister.

I can't vote, I choose not to be on the HLs electoral roll. Mainly so RS can't find me and talk at me to death!!
Only a paand.
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Whoa--unanimous? Looks like I best be dusting off my crown...er, I mean constitution.
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Oh, and might I remind everyone that as we're operating on Florida rules, all 'no' votes count as 'yes' too. :twisted:
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Big Si
School Bully
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Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

CorpPunk wrote: 5 (and most importantly). I have never, ever foresaken Heartland for any other forum, which is far more than I can say of certain members here who shall remain nameless as I've no wish to shame my compatriots *cough*Big Si*cough*.
Consider this a declaration of WAR! :x :evil:

Image
Last edited by Big Si on 23 Feb 2004, 23:23, edited 1 time in total.
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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Planet Dave
Underneath the Rock
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Location: Where the streets fold round

...while we're waiting for the kickbacks to arrive...

:D
'What a heavy load Einstein must have had. Morons everywhere.'
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Big Si wrote:
CorpPunk wrote: 5 (and most importantly). I have never, ever foresaken Heartland for any other forum, which is far more than I can say of certain members here who shall remain nameless as I've no wish to shame my compatriots *cough*Big Si*cough*.
Consider this a declaration of WAR! :x :evil:

Image
Hmmmm...this is a tough one. As a Heartland civilian I'd probably enter into an all-out brawl with Si for insulting me--on my own goddamn thread no less.

But I'm a politician now, and we do things differently on this side of the ballot. We do it--more quietly. Sudden-like. :twisted:




:roll:





Actually, I think we all know that's not true. I'm just flexing my liar muscles, since I'll be using them more often now that I'm taking office.

YOU'RE DEAD BIG MAN!

There now. That's better.
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Big Si
School Bully
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Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

CorpPunk wrote:
Big Si wrote:
CorpPunk wrote: 5 (and most importantly). I have never, ever foresaken Heartland for any other forum, which is far more than I can say of certain members here who shall remain nameless as I've no wish to shame my compatriots *cough*Big Si*cough*.
Consider this a declaration of WAR! :x :evil:

Image
Hmmmm...this is a tough one. As a Heartland civilian I'd probably enter into an all-out brawl with Si "as I insulted him first" --on my own goddamn thread no less.

But I'm a politician now, and we do things differently on this side of the ballot. We do it--more quietly. Sudden-like. :twisted:




:roll:





Actually, I think we all know that's not true. I'm just flexing my liar muscles, since I'll be using them more often now that I'm taking office.

YOU'RE DEAD BIG MAN!

There now. That's better.
Bring it on Mr ICE! :twisted:

Got yer tools yet? :wink: :twisted:

Image
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Big Si wrote:
CorpPunk wrote: 5 (and most importantly). I have never, ever foresaken Heartland for any other forum, which is far more than I can say of certain members here who shall remain nameless as I've no wish to shame my compatriots *cough*Big Si*cough*.
...As a Heartland civilian I'd probably enter into an all-out brawl with Si "as I insulted him first" --on my own goddamn thread no less...
I really have no idea what you're talking about, but I do doubt these imagined insults can be good for your blood pressure. :innocent:
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Big Si
School Bully
Posts: 6747
Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

CorpPunk wrote:
Big Si wrote:
CorpPunk wrote: 5 (and most importantly). I have never, ever foresaken Heartland for any other forum, which is far more than I can say of certain members here who shall remain nameless as I've no wish to shame my compatriots *cough*Big Si*cough*.
...As a Heartland civilian I'd probably enter into an all-out brawl with Si "as I insulted him first" --on my own goddamn thread no less...
I really have no idea what you're talking about, but I do doubt these imagined insults can be good for your blood pressure. :innocent:
Yours must be pretty good, what with all those peanuts you've been eating! :wink: :twisted:
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Oh yes, and I have my tools right here:

Image

:twisted:
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Not that putting a hole in your head would improve your personality at all!

But I always have hope... :twisted:
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Big Si
School Bully
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Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

CorpPunk wrote:Oh yes, and I have my tools right here:

Image

:twisted:
As you showed me yours, I'll show you mine! :wink: :twisted:

Image
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
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Cool! OK, you've convinced me, and I invite you to be my Minister of Offence.
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Big Si
School Bully
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Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

CorpPunk wrote:Cool! OK, you've convinced me, and I invite you to be my Minister of Offence.
:eek:

What just like Chairman Bux? 8) :innocent:
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Big Si wrote:
CorpPunk wrote:Cool! OK, you've convinced me, and I invite you to be my Minister of Offence.
:eek:

What just like Chairman Bux? 8) :innocent:
I bet he'd vote for me too...if he were around.

<tumbleweed>
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Loki
God of Mischief and Discord
Posts: 2351
Joined: 14 Jul 2003, 14:25
Location: Ragnarök

CorpPunk wrote:I'm completely willing.
:eek:

Call me old fashioned but that sort of comment gets my vote everytime. ;D :wink:
Loki was never worshiped as the other Gods,
Which is quite understandable.
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Big Si
School Bully
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Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

Right, can we declare war on http://www.themissionuk.com/ ? :twisted:

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Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
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Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Johnny Boy wrote:
CorpPunk wrote:I'm completely willing.
:eek:

Call me old fashioned but that sort of comment gets my vote everytime. ;D :wink:
8) :lol:
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CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Big Si wrote:Right, can we declare war on http://www.themissionuk.com/ ? :twisted:

Image
HELLZ YEAH!

'My name is CorpPunk. You killed my favourite band. Prepare to die.'
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