tasty melons and crazy dictators

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
Post Reply
User avatar
Quiff Boy
Herr Administrator
Posts: 16793
Joined: 25 Jan 2002, 00:00
Location: Lurking and fixing
Contact:

Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to the world's oddest dictator: Saparmurat Niyazov, the President of Turkmenistan :eek: :notworthy:

http://news.independent.co.uk/world/asi ... ory=511267
He has banned beards and listening to car radios, and instituted a national holiday in honour of a melon. Now the world's craziest dictator has identified a new and pressing danger to his people: gold teeth.
thats mik hucknall f*cked then! ;) :lol:
He had some remarkable advice for the people of his former Soviet republic on how to avoid losing their teeth. "I watched young dogs when I was young," he said. "They were given bones to gnaw. Those of you whose teeth have fallen out did not gnaw on bones. This is my advice."
beautiful. :lol:
Turkmenistan is littered with gold statues of him, including a giant revolving one in the capital, Ashgabat.
...
...
...
Surreally, he has followed in the footsteps of the fictional dictator in Woody Allen's movie Bananas, to redefine the ages of his citizens. Adolescence now lasts until 25, youth doesn't end until 37, and old age starts at 85.

Last year Mr Niyazov instituted a holiday in honour of the muskmelon, a relative of the watermelon, complete with lavish festivities, and ordered that everybody take part. "This godsend has a glorious history," national television announced. "Our great leader, who has a great love of his nation, has brought the name of the tasty melons to the level of a national holiday."
:urff: :roll:

however, it's not all fun and games:
The United Nations Human Rights Commission is due to vote this week on a resolution condemning Mr Niyazov, saying his rule is based "on the repression of all opposition political activities". It expresses grave concern over "arbitrary detention and imprisonment ... suppression of independent media ... restrictions on the exercise of freedom of thought ... discrimination against ethnic Russian, Uzbek and other minorities".
strange that he's been allowed to go so off the rails, non?

here's the rub:
the West has long been prepared to turn a blind eye to Mr Niyazov's excesses as companies compete for a planned pipeline to export gas through Afghanistan
hmmm....
What’s the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
User avatar
emilystrange
Above the Chemist
Posts: 9031
Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.

and we thought thatcher was bad for milk snatching.
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
User avatar
Mrs RicheyJames
Overbomber
Posts: 4128
Joined: 10 Feb 2003, 00:33
Location: Rick Astley's house. Trying to find out why he chooses to look like Timsinister.

LMFAO
Only a paand.
User avatar
Thrash Harry
Utterly Bastard Filthy
Posts: 1577
Joined: 13 May 2003, 20:56
Location: Over The Hill And Far Away
Contact:

emilystrange wrote:and we thought thatcher was bad for milk snatching.
:lol:

Ever thought of auditioning for the Crankies?
Go to sleep now, Francis.
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:

Quiff Boy wrote:here's the rub:
the West has long been prepared to turn a blind eye to Mr Niyazov's excesses as companies compete for a planned pipeline to export gas through Afghanistan
hmmm....
Hmmm indeed. As long as the crazy dictator is prepared to help the West, we're not going to bother him.

See also Mugabe, Pinochet, Marcos... etc. ad infinitum. :?
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
User avatar
emilystrange
Above the Chemist
Posts: 9031
Joined: 03 Nov 2003, 20:26
Location: Lady Strange's boudoir.

........

no. not ever. careful...
I don't wanna live like I don't mind
Post Reply