MY Precious

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
Post Reply
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Like a thief in the night (stealing her own things) or maybe a ragtag Santa Claus, my recently-deported ex-housemate stopped by about three o'clock this morning and left two gifts with my other housemate, A. One for A., and one for me. As I was leaving for work, A. gave me a ring box with my initials on it; I opened it to find a mood ring* that proved too small for all my fingers save the pinky--for which it is, of course, too big. As I was loathe to let such a lovely present go unworn, I slipped the Hand of God pendant off the chain around my neck (it had become too tarnished from sucking all the evil out of my soul to wear anyway), and hung the ring on it instead. The ring has stayed a solid, dark, and very fetching shade of navy ever since.**

At first I noticed nothing amiss--perhaps my self-denunciations had become a little more fervent, and slightly louder, than usual, but not so much as to make me question it. As the day wore on, I began muttering 'fat hobbitses' under my breath while stroking the ring between my thumb and forefinger, and I once threatened to gouge my boss's eyes out when she complimented its beauty. I feel as if this is the way things should be, have always been, will always be, but I can't help wondering...

Should I be worried?






*You know, changes color with body heat.

**Actually it turned violet while I wrote this. Should that be Heartland's official color?? Maybe this place just turns me on.
Top
User avatar
Big Si
School Bully
Posts: 6746
Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

You been on the mushrooms again then, hen? :lol:
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
Top
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

Ain't America grand!

Image
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
Top
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

You best not be calling me a 'moran,' Red, cos I might not know what it is, but I don't like the sound of it.



P.s. The Precious says, "Step off!"
Top
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

All I'm saying is 'Land of the free, in the home of the brave'?
Must be a feckin' big home ie. house!
'Home of the free, in the land of the brave'.
That's more like it. Nes pas?

Well, to me anyway...

Glasgow/Scotland/UK/Europe has many morans too!
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
Top
User avatar
Planet Dave
Underneath the Rock
Posts: 6677
Joined: 22 Apr 2003, 23:51
Location: Where the streets fold round

Started crawling DOWN the walls as well as up them yet, Corpy? That's a pretty good sign that things ain't right.
If you were asking my opinion then I would say delete that.
Top
User avatar
Black Planet
Andrew's Love Goddess
Posts: 2170
Joined: 02 Jun 2003, 20:16

@ RS

It's
Oh Say does that star spangled banner yet wave..
In the land of the free AND the home of the Brave.

Written by Francis Scott Key. I toured Fort Henry in Baltimore where he wrote it. Impressive fort. Never count a Marylander out. ;)
Top
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Dave Whelan wrote:Started crawling DOWN the walls as well as up them yet, Corpy? That's a pretty good sign that things ain't right.
:lol: :notworthy:
Top
User avatar
Black Planet
Andrew's Love Goddess
Posts: 2170
Joined: 02 Jun 2003, 20:16

Is RS calling you a moron CP?????
Top
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

Naw, I think he's trying to call me a 'moran,' and using antiquated song lyrics to back it up, but you sorted that BP.

Fact is, this post has nothing to do with my being American. The Precious has no nationality!!!



:twisted: **fat heartlanderses** :twisted:
Top
User avatar
hallucienate
Overbomber
Posts: 4602
Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
Contact:
Contact hallucienate

America: land of the moderately oppressed
Top
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:
Contact markfiend

Frodo has failed. Clicky.

(Put as a link rather than embedding the image cos it's big.)

Edited. See below.
Last edited by markfiend on 21 May 2004, 09:59, edited 1 time in total.
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
Top
User avatar
hallucienate
Overbomber
Posts: 4602
Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
Contact:
Contact hallucienate

markfiend wrote:http://people.msoe.edu/~meyermd/pics/fr ... failed.jpg

(Put as a link rather than embedding the image cos it's big.)
... and you didn't even say clicky
Top
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:
Contact markfiend

hallucienate wrote:
markfiend wrote:http://people.msoe.edu/~meyermd/pics/fr ... failed.jpg

(Put as a link rather than embedding the image cos it's big.)
... and you didn't even say clicky
...Because I wanted people to see what the jpg was called.

OK, edited

Happy now? :lol:
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
Top
User avatar
hallucienate
Overbomber
Posts: 4602
Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
Contact:
Contact hallucienate

blissfully so.
Top
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:
Contact markfiend

Glad to be of service ;)
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
Top
User avatar
hallucienate
Overbomber
Posts: 4602
Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
Contact:
Contact hallucienate

glad to be served
Top
User avatar
markfiend
goriller of form 3b
Posts: 21181
Joined: 11 Nov 2003, 10:55
Location: st custards
Contact:
Contact markfiend

:o
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
Top
User avatar
smiscandlon
Overbomber
Posts: 2595
Joined: 05 Feb 2004, 23:52

CorpPunk wrote: :twisted: **fat heartlanderses** :twisted:
:lol: I read that as "fat heartland arses"! :lol:
Top
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

@ mf: I choked on my free doughnut. Explains a lot, that. Maybe I should run for president in 2008? :twisted:

@ smiscandlon: Either one will do. :lol:
Top
User avatar
hallucienate
Overbomber
Posts: 4602
Joined: 17 Apr 2002, 01:00
Location: /\/¯¯¯¯¯\/\
Contact:
Contact hallucienate

CorpPunk wrote:@ mf: I choked on my free doughnut. Explains a lot, that. Maybe I should run for president in 2008? :twisted:
I thought that was only allowed for people who aren't black, gay or female?
Top
User avatar
Chairman Bux
shut.the.fuck.up
Posts: 931
Joined: 23 May 2002, 01:00
Location: Buxville-on-Sea
Contact:
Contact Chairman Bux

hallucienate wrote:
CorpPunk wrote:@ mf: I choked on my free doughnut. Explains a lot, that. Maybe I should run for president in 2008? :twisted:
I thought that was only allowed for people who aren't black, gay or female?
Or those lacking in integrity.
Minister of Misinformation and Misdirection.

We first met through a shared view
She loved me and I did too
Top
User avatar
Karst
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1452
Joined: 04 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Belfast

Chairman Bux wrote:Or those lacking in integrity.
No - that's for the CEO of a large Anglo-Dutch oil company. ;)

8)
Top
CorpPunk
Pirate of Penzance
Posts: 882
Joined: 29 Sep 2003, 05:48

I can fake being a middle-aged, white, southern, male, born-again christian, big business CEO with situational ethics and an overweening belief in divine right rule. I can fake that easy.

Although I admit it's rather boring that a playful post on hobbitses becomes yet another indictment of American political affairs, simply, I suppose, because the author happens to be American. Props to mf for at least making a relevant bridge. *sigh*
Top
User avatar
Chairman Bux
shut.the.fuck.up
Posts: 931
Joined: 23 May 2002, 01:00
Location: Buxville-on-Sea
Contact:
Contact Chairman Bux

"situational ethics"

:notworthy: :lol:
Minister of Misinformation and Misdirection.

We first met through a shared view
She loved me and I did too
Top
Post Reply

Return to “General Chat”