Heartland

Hey magpies! Behold your god

The controversy over apostrophe-gate rumbles on.

With helpful video of what happens when you stand up on a gondola to take selfies.

Pista wrote: ↑07 Dec 2023, 13:54 With helpful video of what happens when you stand up on a gondola to take selfies.

maaan dont go telling the fucktards shit like that! i bet its worth a days wages in Cornettos & grabbing womens arses to the gondoliers when thats happens! must be hysterical.

I'm net saying this is awkward, but....

Man "absolutely fuming" after evilbay slashes the price of his.....big Hula Hoop.

Video shows utter carnage caused by storm Isha: Warning. Graphic.

Pista wrote: ↑23 Jan 2024, 14:06 Video shows utter carnage caused by storm Isha: Warning. Graphic.

A miracle that no one died.

Swindon reels from storm Isha & the sheer devastation it brought with it.

BBC News - Driver guilty of attacking gas man with chippy tea
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-m ... e-68251369

"What happened then was wholly inappropriate and criminally wrong and in a fit of temper you threw the contents of your chip shop dinner into his face in a deliberate act intending to assault him with that dinner,"

ruffers wrote: ↑09 Feb 2024, 22:35 BBC News - Driver guilty of attacking gas man with chippy tea
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-m ... e-68251369

"What happened then was wholly inappropriate and criminally wrong and in a fit of temper you threw the contents of your chip shop dinner into his face in a deliberate act intending to assault him with that dinner,"

assault? I'd call that a free dinner

ruffers wrote: ↑09 Feb 2024, 22:35 BBC News - Driver guilty of attacking gas man with chippy tea
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-m ... e-68251369

"What happened then was wholly inappropriate and criminally wrong and in a fit of temper you threw the contents of your chip shop dinner into his face in a deliberate act intending to assault him with that dinner,"

A long-debated grammatical conundrum has finally been settled.

And now for something completely different. A man with 68 matchsticks up his nose.

"I have fairly large nostrils and quite stretchy skin. I'm sure that helped a lot."

Fair enough.

Pista wrote: ↑17 Feb 2024, 11:39 And now for something completely different. A man with 68 matchsticks up his nose.

Guys a f**king amateur. i can get a whole box of bryant & mays bluebells (or englands glory) up one nostril using the technique of lips<tongue<nostril. EITHER nostril i may add. & sulphur end up. when you pull them all out your nose is burning from snot-dissolved sulphur and your bogeys are blue.

Stop me if you've heard this one before. A one-legged robber goes to a post office. With a spoon......

Pista wrote: ↑28 Feb 2024, 08:38 Stop me if you've heard this one before. A one-legged robber goes to a post office. With a spoon......

Well you couldn't make that up.

https://www.irishtimes.com/business/202 ... in-russia/

Vanished Wirecard executive thought to be living as Orthodox priest in Russia
Investigation by Germany’s Spiegel, Austria’s Standard and two other media outlets claims Jan Marsalek was helped escape by an erotic actress turned spy

The white rum based adventures of Johnny Turnip, Big Tony and Puerto Rico Paul and their quest to trap a fairy.

There you have it. Worcester has the best ducks.

The ever growing list of things the Daily Heil classifies as woke now includes....*checks notes*.....Scones.

It is really quite amazing we've survived this long as a species.