Heartland

Andie wrote: unfortunately us fat, balding, overweight, ex goths ain't exactly what they're lookin for

i'm still trying to figure if there was anything positive in that statement

Nope, but it is the truth though ...

But hey, it's the internet, the place where I'm not bald and fat, but a high libido love god (as long as you don't ask me to post pictures )

In an ideal world i'd "go like a privy door when the plague is in town"

Wonder what they'll do if I say that I fancy girls as well (and it's true)

*inhales sharply & drops very hot cup of coffee on lap*

I didn't realise Pista was a lad...

He never mentioned it in any of his PMs and letters

http://www.myheartland.co.uk/gallery/de ... ge_id=1290

The bloke on Zeno's right.

Pista= Steve (in Hungarian)

i'm asking my self...what a few females are there in this forum?....maybe i need to try another
suggestions?

psichonaut wrote: suggestions?

Something annoyingly girlie ?

What bothers me is how some women just don't want to realize that us guys can have some emotional depth as well, even if we don't like that crappy sensitive b.s.

Badlander wrote:

psichonaut wrote: suggestions?

Something annoyingly girlie ?

What bothers me is how some women just don't want to realize that us guys can have some emotional depth as well, even if we don't like that crappy sensitive b.s.

agree

Just took a look at the girls' place. Apparently the fart issue didn't go unnoticed...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hxOr3q7nrk


check this ... American Cops Gawd Bless 'em !!

silentNate wrote:I didn't realise Pista was a lad...

He never mentioned it in any of his PMs and letters

You didn't guess from the "Cheers, Steve" in his sig?

Pista wrote:

Wonder what they'll do if I say that I fancy girls as well (and it's true)

*inhales sharply & drops very hot cup of coffee on lap*

Eh, all the cool ones like both.

Pista wrote:http://www.myheartland.co.uk/gallery/de ... ge_id=1290

The bloke on Zeno's right.

I thought this'd be the thread where people could distinguish left and right?

Maisey wrote:How about we all get together, crack open a drink or 10 and try and count how many people get killed in commando eh lads?

236 in the new John Rambo film

Is it just me, or does the semi-constant generalisation from most women about us males being so much more superficial than then get on your nerves as well?

I'm sure we've all had to deal with the comments like: "But you're only interested in her because she's got big tits, great legs and is prettier than me."

The answer is, of course: "No, I'm interested in her because she's female, the list you came out with are bonus points."

I mean, if women are so much less shallow than us men, why do they have more grooming products that us? Why is the fashion industry geared more towards them? Why do they have such a huge range of cosmetics? Why do more women than men have cosmetic surgery?

Talk about the pot falsely accusing the kettle of being more carbonised.

I need more beer. And cheesecake. Have we got any cheesecake? Am I going to have to go on a Tesco's run? If so, does anyone need a resupply of beer/spirits/wine/smokes?

Syberberg wrote:I need more beer. And cheesecake. Have we got any cheesecake? Am I going to have to go on a Tesco's run? If so, does anyone need a resupply of beer/spirits/wine/smokes?

...for my Cup of Tea, thanks!

Syberberg wrote:Is it just me, or does the semi-constant generalisation from most women about us males being so much more superficial than then get on your nerves as well?

That was pretty much my point.

Now are we allowed to quote from the other thread, you know, the one that's supposed to smell like pot-pourri ? Some of these posts are actually pretty funny.

Whatever happened to Curried Beans, I used to love them in a toastie with some garlic sausage hmmm.

There's this episode of Scrubs (season 1) where JD doesn't know whether or not he should ask this girl he hasn't seen yet on a date (she's stuck in a MRI machine the whole time).
His best friend Turk then says : "What does your heart tell you ?"
JD's answer : "My heart hates ugles."

Syberberg wrote:Is it just me, or does the semi-constant generalisation from most women about us males being so much more superficial than then get on your nerves as well?

generalization...is what they do better

Syberberg wrote: I'm sure we've all had to deal with the comments like: "But you're only interested in her because she's got big tits, great legs and is prettier than me

The answer is, of course: "No, I'm interested in her because she's female, the list you came out with are bonus points.

Syberberg wrote: I mean, if women are so much less shallow than us men, why do they have more grooming products that us? Why is the fashion industry geared more towards them? Why do they have such a huge range of cosmetics? Why do more women than men have cosmetic surgery?

because we don't need all that crap....and because they aren't really pretty without

And men can be as sensitive as them, really!

A poem to demonstrate!

Women are like snowflakes...

They are all beautiful.
They are all different.
They can all be cold as ice.
But they'll all melt when they land on your face......

IZ.

I'm glad the observation has been made that most women are indeed shallow as bird vomit.

Like our esteemed comrades have noted, women indeed like to point out our fur balls when it comes to 'ogling' other women as they walk by or appear on the t.v - "You only like her cos..she's not an over bearing, self pitying, humourless vapid shell like me"

Yet, gather more than two women together at any one time, I think a collective is known as a "Yenta" ( from the Jewish saying of Yentering ; One who likes to gossip). Their shallow like characteristics come racing to the surface quicker than you can "That Russel Brand, what a real twit he really is". Give them any excuse and they'll not only hammer your faults into the ground but they'll go all moist over some skeletal framed, delicate featured high cheek boned waif known more commonly as "The Fag". Sorry for using the F -word in public but these people go out of their way to appear and act feminine and for so women they just love it - which makes me doubt some women's sexuality altogether! Be like the majority of gothy men finding Rosie O'Donnell or Dawn French just that little bit too tempting.

So let them witter on about Depp, Brand, Bowie and Murphy ( both in or around their 50's hahaha) they've got just about as much chance of bumping uglies with them as I have with Kate Beckinsale tonight -

Was that door bell ? d'oh.

Izzy HaveMercy wrote: Women are like snowflakes...

They are all beautiful.
They are all different.
They can all be cold as ice.
But they'll all melt when they land on your face......

Pat wrote:Whatever happened to Curried Beans, I used to love them in a toastie with some garlic sausage hmmm.

You can still get them , I bloody love them me, I like mine, and ordinary Beans for that matter, on Toast with Two fried Eggs on top

Linger Fickin' Good

The thing I like about women is that you don't have to put Bovril on the end of your Nob to get them to lick it like you have to do with your Labrador.................. .....................nope, you've just got to tell them you'll buy them a Pair of Shoes

Hexe Luciferia wrote:

SINsister wrote:I want the pretty face, the sag-, hair-, and fat-free body, the lack of wrinkles, the full head of (preferably-long, but freakishly-styled or unnaturally-colored will do in a pinch! ) hair...

yes, yes yes and even more!
Totally with you!

Christ on a Hairy Bike , have you read the latest on Deluded.Net, Aye, and I want a 22 year old Liz McClarnon with Tits Two cup sizes bigger..........and I want her to cook like Delia..........and be able to suck a golf ball through 10 feet of garden hose
That thread is the best ever