Heartland

How to handle telemarketers.

Fantastic,can I use that ?

The best!

I'll get back to you discussing more possibilities for this

Brilliant!

superb.

Pat wrote:Fantastic,can I use that ?

Can you use it, Pat?
You posted on a Blast thread, I may marry you...


Did ya gettit?

James Blast wrote: Did ya gettit?

Yeah,but it took about an hour

cheap little Mexican midget

funny as f*ck

Ah wow, next time someone calls trying to sell me double-glazing...

..while there is a slight risc for somebody who performs that joke once too often that offices actually declare him to be dead. That has happened before..

markfiend wrote:Ah wow, next time someone calls trying to sell me double-glazing...

just do what i do and tell them you already have windows and then hang up before they can reply!
slays me every time

Reminds me of the time Jehovah's Witnesses knocked round. I just turned back into the house and shouted "you can put the goat away now, we've got humans to sacrifice!" You've never seen anyone move so fast.

markfiend wrote:Reminds me of the time Jehovah's Witnesses knocked round. I just turned back into the house and shouted "you can put the goat away now, we've got humans to sacrifice!" You've never seen anyone move so fast.

I remember my parents showing me from a very young age how to deal with nuisance visitors...

Jehova's Witness: Do you believe in God?

My mum: Not on my doorstep.

*Slams door*

smiscandlon wrote:

markfiend wrote:Reminds me of the time Jehovah's Witnesses knocked round. I just turned back into the house and shouted "you can put the goat away now, we've got humans to sacrifice!" You've never seen anyone move so fast.

I remember my parents showing me from a very young age how to deal with nuisance visitors...

Jehova's Witness: Do you believe in God?

My mum: Not on my doorstep.

*Slams door*

A neighbour of mine, some years ago:
Jehova´s wtnesses (Two neatly dressed elderly housewifes): Do you believe in God?
Neighbour (Worn off alcoholic, a hell´s reject kind of person): Na, but I´d fancy a shag, wouldn´t a quicky for three be nice? (He was actually serious about it..)

No Jehova´s Witnesses ever came here since..

markfiend wrote:Reminds me of the time Jehovah's Witnesses knocked round. I just turned back into the house and shouted "you can put the goat away now, we've got humans to sacrifice!" You've never seen anyone move so fast.

I used to have a plaque on my door that said, "So many christians, so few lions." The JWs never seemed to bother me...