Andrew co hosting Offbeat 89

[eotunun]

As announced on Sisters Chat:
The first part of Andrew co hosting Offbeat magazine in typed version. I will try a life once I am ready with part three, promissed!

Andrew interviewed by/co moderating with Christian Eckert

Eckert: "Welcome to Off Beat!The great night has taken place, the reviews were very mixed, in my opinion it was as chaotic as it should, only one point bothers me a bit, that is Philip Boa. For he made a remark:(inserted video of P.Boa on stage, saying "Yes, I know, but it wasn´t our choice!")
We were wondering what he might have meant with that, and we didn´t find out. Andrew and I couldn´t figure it out, either. He is, by the eway, my studio guest, Hi Andrew!"
A.E.: "Good evening!"
Eckert: "Good evening!"
A.E.: "Good evening!"
Eckert: "Good evening! Well, good evening or not; Phil gave us a riddle there, for what did he mean? Did he mean he didn´t want to appear on stage or he didn´t want to appear with playback? For it came out that many people said we had forced him to use playback. But no, that was his very own wish to use playback! It must have been when he was on stage that he noticed what a major mistake he had made there, as he got his reward immediately. (Inserted Video of P.Boa onstage, getting a shower from the audience and leaving the stage in anger while the musictape goes on playing)
Yes, "Splut" it went.."
A.E.: "his own fault!"
Eckert: "His own fault, isn´t it? Andrew, what do you think about it? You can´t let anyone say such things about you?"
A.E.: "No"
Eckert: "Would you do such things?"
A.E.: "Absolutely not!"
Eckert: "Absolutely not.. Andrew Eldritch, The Sisters of Mercy, Hamburgian by choice, fencer, contemporarily on holliday, a longterm holliday. You have more or less just returned from Los Angeles. What did you do there?"
A.E.: "I got pretty bored there."
Eckert: "You got bored there, can that happen there?"
A.E.: "Oh yes! It´s the best city for that!"
Eckert: "It´s the best city for getting bored?"
A.E.: "The best of all!"
Eckert: "You have to explain that."
A.E.: "There is nothing there! Nothing at all, no people, only traffic."
Eckert: "And that´s why you have retreated there. (Andrew confirms) But you are a person who doesn´t like being in public anyway?"
A.E.: "I take a look at it."
Eckert: "Just stand asside an watch people."
A.E.: "Yes, I have difficulty when it comes to taking part."
Eckert: "Maybe we should just listen to some music to get your tempers up a bit. Do you have any wis...?"
A.E.: "If the need be.. Go ahead!"
Eckert: "Go ahead? A bit of music: (This Corrosion video played)
Andrew Eldritch is here as guest today, my co-moderator. Did you ever do such a thing before?"
A.E.: "I never did. It´s rather badly paid, isn´t it?"
Eckert: "It´s very badly paid.."
A.E.: "That´s why!"
Eckert: "(laughs)Do you earn enough, meanwhile?"
A.E.: "Hmm, nah."
Eckert: "One never earns enough, right?"
A.E.: "(hesitates) Well, I don´t"
Eckert: "When exactly did you come to Hamburg?"
A.E.: "About three years ago."
Eckert: "And why?"
A.E.: "That´s a long story.. a quite mortifying one!"
Eckert: "Why mortifying?"
A.E.: "Ah, just go on, please.."(Andrew toys around with cigarette and lighter)
Eckert: "(laughs) You can´t keep telling me to go on all the time.. It´s allright if you light a cigarette. Okay. You live at Hamburg, I won´t tell where for otherwise you´ll have all the girls in front of your door.. You have been living in the city for a while?"
A.E.: "Every now and then.."
Eckert: "..now and then.. And you are member of a fencing club. What do you do there, fencing? Is that the kind of sport for you?"
A.E.: "One might say so, yes. I was forced to do it as pupil as I couldn´t play rugby."
Eckert: "You couldn´t play rugby. I never liked that either, an awfull sport!"
A.E.: "Man simply is too brittle for playing rugby!"
Eckert: "And that´s how you got to fencing to keep the people at distance? Is it still like that today, a bit of Zen or the art of fencing?"
A.E.: "(thinks for 5 seconds) Yeah. In a way. That all sounds rather pompously in a way, but it´s true."
Eckert: "How many times a week do you go fencing?"
A.E.: "Two or three times, if I can spare the time for it."
Eckert: "And that´s really hard training?"
A.E.: "Yes, it´s quite strenuous."
Eckert: "So you really feel it in your bones?"
A.E.: "I feel it in my knees."
Eckert: "So, despite avoiding rugby, you have problems with your knees?"
A.E.: "Yes. But I survive fencing!"
Eckert: "You survive.. There are various kinds of weapons. Foil, sabre and rapier, which do you use there?"
A.E.: "Well, I am a sabre master."
Eckert: "A sabre master. Is that the heaviest? It isn´t the heaviest, is it?"
A.E.: "No, rapier is the heaviest."
Eckert: "Do you have enough training opprtunities at Hamburg?"
A.E.: "Actually not, cause here in Hamburg sabre is hardly used, so I have to fight with rapier. Which stresses the wrist."
Eckert: "Wouldn´t you like to go to Tauber-Bischofsheim once?* To take a look?"
A.E.: "For a short holliday!"
Eckert: "For training?"
A.E.: "For a hollidaybattle!"
Eckert: "That would be something?"
A.E.: "Sure."
Eckert: "I fear we have to watch even more music so that your tempers get still better. (Andrew giggles) Do you know "Turnpike TV"?"
A.E.: "No. Never heard of it."
Eckert: "Never heard of it? Well-That´s an english company, founded about 1981, which produces freaky video programmes. You never heard of them?"
A.E.: "Well, I don´t have a TV set, so..(laughs)"
Eckert: "So, Turnpike TV is a company from England that started years ago to make very abstruse and really really good videos available for sale. We allready saw some of the videos the Turnkipe boys made, for example "Two Cut". There also is firm belonging company called "The Turnpike Cruisers". And here comes the big deal for all Off Beat watchers: If you want the full catalogue what videos they offer, that´s everything from wallpaper videos (Turns to Andrew)Do you know these? (Andrew shakes his head)No? You put in a tape, and see, for example, an aquarium!"
A.E.: "(Whispers)Oh my...!"
Eckert: "Yes, but really good! Or, for example, one is called "Baby". And you only see a baby, one hour of nurseling! Anyway-really crazy stuff"
A.E. Interrupts Eckert: "Well, I´m only intersted in nude women and drugs!"
Eckert: "Nude women and drugs! We´ll continue there in a minute! In a minute!" Introduces a video by the Turnpike Cruisers)

*Germany´s fencing centre. Training site for the olympic teams etc.

[lachert]

good work. thanks
waiting for other parts

[ormfdmrush]

thanks, Jumlaut
nude women and drugs!

[Ozpat]

My German is good enough to understand every word spoken in the interview but I think it is great you take the time and effort to translate
it for the others.

[lachert]

yeah, now i'm understand these all pictures of eldo with sabre

never heard of it before

[smiscandlon]

"Well, I am a sabre master."

Now there's a chat-up line!

[eotunun]

My German is good enough to understand every word spoken in the interview but I think it is great you take the time and effort to translate
it for the others.

I think it might be fun for you to look in the general direction of Aachen next Weekend. On the horizon, you´ll see a smokecloud. That´ll be my head and keyboard..

Psst-Am I overdoing dramawise again?

[Ozpat]

My German is good enough to understand every word spoken in the interview but I think it is great you take the time and effort to translate
it for the others.

I think it might be fun for you to look in the general direction of Aachen next Weekend. On the horizon, you´ll see a smokecloud. That´ll be my head and keyboard..

Psst-Am I overdoing dramawise again?

Aachen? That's only 15 k. from my place. I will have a good look J.

Have fun!!!

[eotunun]

Well-Some 100Km behind Aachen, you´ll find me..
No! The smoking wreck that once was me!

[Big Si]

Thanks Jam-Lout

[eotunun]

Okay, this is Part 2!
I knew you´d be hungry for more, so I hurried a bit.. I´ll add a few links (if available) as explanations.

Eckert: "Andrew Eldritch, still guest here as co-moderator at Off Beat. By now he hasn´t fully warmed up yet. He´s a bit nervous, I think.."
A.E.: "..I didn´t get any coffee yet!"
Eckert: "You didn´t get any coffee yet?"
A.E.: "Nah.."
Eckert: "We can get some, that´s no problem."
A.E.: "Welcome."
Eckert: "Shall we get you a coffee and the we´ll go on?"
A.E.: "With whole milk, grey, nice grey. English style."
Eckert: "English style. But I fear the coffee itself is somewhat stronger than the usual english one."
A.E.: "Now you have me trembling!"
Eckert: (laughs)"You really want a coffee now? Okay, I´ll get you a coffee, and meanwhile we´ll watch some more stuff by the Turnpike boys. They made a video with Alien Sex Fiend, R.E.P., RIP, Rest In Piece!
(break)
So, Andrew, there you have your coffee. Admit it, am I not like a mother to you? Cheerio!"
A.E.: "Stimulating frees!" (I am not entirely sure about this)
Eckert: (laughs)"Now tell me more about nude women and drugs!"
A.E.: "Oh, you are so young!"
Eckert: "I am too young? I only look young.."
A.E.: "When you´ve become a bit older."
Eckert: "How old?"
A.E.: "As old as me, for instance."
Eckert: "How old are you?"
A.E.: "Old as hell!"
Eckert: (laughs)"Aww! Oh come on! A bit! Now I have to grizzle a bit."
A.E.: "I´m not thirty yet."
Eckert: "You are not thirty yet? In this life?"
A.E.: "..in this life."
Eckert: "In the former one, you are?"
Andrew half laughs, half coughs out smoke
Eckert: "Allright, let´s talk about music. None by you, for you are having a creative break, if I get the picture rightly?"
A.E.: "Yes."
Eckert: "What do you think about Alien Sex Fiend?"
A.E.: "Never heard that!"
Eckert: "Never heard that before?"
A.E.: "Got something to do with those "goffs"?"
Eckert: "With goffs, yes. What do you think about goffs in general?"
A.E.: "That´s quite daft, ain´t it? The Goth scene, I mean."
Eckert: "Yes? But they all refer a bit to you, just so you don´t.."
A.E.: "..REALLY?---But why?"
Eckert: "..I don´t see the least hint why- I mean, I find your songs heart-refreshingly cheerfull and.."
A.E.: nods emphatically, gestures to emphasize even more "You are right there!"
Eckert: "..they allways really pick me up, I mean, I find them really good.. Maybe they don´t exactly make me laugh, but.."
A.E.: "..maybe I´ll tell you some about the nude women.."
Eckert: "..YES? (chuckles) well, your music gives me a real feeling of lust to do everything! How strongly are music and lust connected for you?"
A.E.: "Much."
Eckert: "Much? Is it as good as with drugs and women?"
A.E.: "No, but, you see, I´m not so good at drugs.. and.. women.."
Eckert: "Not so good? That´s why you prefer music?"
A.E.: "See, I´m rather small, quite brittle, not a great f*cker.. So I had to become musician. Someday. You learn everything"
Eckert: "So you became musician."
A.E.: "Somewhat"
Eckert: "When did you make that decision?"
A.E.: "A pure coincidence! That was.. eightyone, or ..eightytwo, I believe. I was drummer back then. Bad as hell."
Eckert: "And that was when you thought that has to become something real now?"
A.E.: "I just didn´t want a regular job. (chuckles)"
Eckert: "You just didn´t want to do real work? Exactly, that´s it!"
A.E.: "That´s what it´s all about."
Eckert: "That´s what all rock´n`roll is about, they are all people who just don´t want to work?"
A.E.: "I was trained, that´s back then, trained to translate chinese!"
Eckert: "You generally have a crush on odd languages, you learnt german as well. How did you get to that?"
A.E.: "well, I am sorry, I lost my abillity of speach at America. So that´s recently."
Eckert: "When you were there, during the holliday? You loose that fast there?"
A.E.: "for, the amis can´t speak english as well."
Eckert: "That´s only some basic english what they speak?"
A.E.: "You don´t at all! You just sit in the car."
Eckert: "And drive past each others.."
A.E.: "Yes."
Eckert: "How did you get to german? That´s a quite an unusual language, after all, especially for an englishman."
A.E.: "No! I´m anglo-saxon. See?"
Eckert: "So that´s the connection. Classically."
A.E.: "Since the fifth century."
Eckert: "Man, you are actually well-educated!?* That´s the bee´s knees!
Listen, I heard you are interested in nursery rhymes?"
A.E.: "Just the meanest."
Eckert: "Just the meanest? Like "Zehn kleine Negerlein***"? Can you recite that for us, for I can´t remember it anymore."
A.E.: (Sings the second verse) "Nine little negroes went hunting, one was shot dead, so there were only eight! ..Or so."
Eckert: "What was your interest in that? Did you want to adapt that? Was that some idea, or is that still some idea of yours?"
A.E.: "Na-I just got a cheap CD."
Eckert: "A cheap CD?"(laughs)
A.E.: "It´s called "Bi-Ba-Butzemann****".
Eckert: "Bi-Ba-Butzemann?"
A.E.: "A Bi-Ba-Butzemann dances!"
Eckert: "These old german nursery rhymes are.."
A.E.: ".. They really are mean!"
Eckert: "A part of them is really under the belt, allmost fascist as I find, like "Ten Little Negroes". Don´t you think so, too?"
Andrew nods emphatically.
Eckert: "There is one version of the verse where it says "The one sh*t to death", not "was shot dead", do you know that one?"
A.E.: (laughs)"No!"
Eckert: "It´s true, it´s really tough! And how did you get to that material, who introduced you to it? Or did you find it yourself sometime?"
A.E.: "Well, as I said, cheap CDs."
Eckert: "I see, on some ferry tale CD. That´s where you found them."
A.E.: "Yes."
Eckert: "And do you intend to make something of it? Sisters of Mercy with german nursery rhymes?"
A.E.: "Nah.. Maybe appear a few times at Bavaria with that perhaps?"
Eckert: "At Bavaria?"
A.E.: "Yes, they got a crush on stuff like that!"
Eckert: "That´s what I heard, too. They got crush on such things, yes."
A.E.: "It really is a pity that Gauweiler has quit and that.. that.. giant frog.."
Eckert: "Giant frog?"
A.E.: "Yes, that, that Strauß-thing."
Eckert: "Yes, well.."
A.E.: "..for the two aren´t as funny as they used to be."
Eckert: "Since he quit, you mean?"
A.E.: "You can´t enjoy them as you could then, anymore. It´s a pity."
Eckert: "There is a german musician called Rio Reiser, did you hear about him?"
A.E.: "Nah."
Eckert: "Well, he didn´t want to go to Bavaria anymore. But you would still go there? at least for shows?"
A.E.: "Erm.. Yes, for taking a look at it."
Eckert: "Take a look at it.. Erm, when you have such a creative break, how do you notice that it´s time again? For a new record?"
A.E.: "Well, I sit in my flat in front of the mixing desk, and I wait. And then -finally- someone sings to me."
Eckert: "Someone?"
A.E.: "Someone sings to me."
Eckert: "Sings to you? Like some kind of a muse, one might say? From behind, right into the ear?"
A.E.: "Then the song sudenly is there."
Eckert: "Do all your songs happen as fast or that abrupt?"
A.E.: "One has to work on them, still!"
Eckert: "That´s clear. But the ideas come like whoosh!, they don´t come one by one, that something grows, that just comes like that in one piece?"
A.E.: "You can´t ..invent the ideas like that. It´s just somehow there. And you either have them in controll or not."
Eckert: "And what do yo..."
A.E.: "...Well, what do I know, I am no musician!"
Eckert: (Nearly spits out his coffee for laughing) "Okay, then we´ll have some more music, perhaps you´ll change your mind about your being a musician."
A.E.: "A better one than those on the screen anyway!"

*actually Eckert uses a pun here**, saying "Verbildet" instead of the correct "Gebildet", which means well-educated, but in a useless way. I was considering translating that as "Ill-educated", which I thought might match well-What say you good people, a good choice? In that case I´ll edit.
**this commedy is second to none.
***An authentic german song for little children, traditional, "Zehn kleine Negerlein" means "Ten little Negroes".. The song is similar to the Ten Green Bottles song. Only that it´s a countdown with humans, and more inventive about the means of their exclusion from the sum..
****Title of another german nursery rhyme. Less questionable than ***.

[Bartek]

thank you very much

[Elise]

yeah, now i'm understand these all pictures of eldo with sabre

never heard of it before

You can read it on the official sisters site too ;
I like to fence (when I get the opportunity), so I've got a fair amount of fencing equipment in an appropriately long bag. Most of it was bought at Leon Paul in London. Various shoes, tunics, breeches, body wire, a couple of masks and half a dozen weapons. I've got a couple of foils with regular and pistol grips, one epee with a pistol grip, and a few sabres, which is my weapon of choice. It's generally thought that French blades have the best steel. I've no idea where mine were made.

It's in' technical boys' , and then 'personal kit''.
I think that's also the reason why he's able to make all these impressive
moves in the videos of Lucretia , Dominion and This corrosion with that stick .

Oh , and good translations eotunun !

[eotunun]

Pleased to please!

[eotunun]

Part 3:

Eckert: "Tell me, Andrew: Do you know Link Ray?"
A.E.: "Yes, but only from seeing."
Eckert: "Only from seeing and hearsay?"
A.E.: "Yes, that´s right."
Eckert: "Rumble Link Ray."
A.E.: "He was here in our studio, and we asked him to do the Two Minutes for us. You know, we give people two minutes of airtime, and they can do what they like. Do you want to see what he did?"
A.E.: "Please!"
Eckert: "Good. Link Ray!"
(A two minute clip with Link Rays blurp gets played.)
A.E.: "Fine!"
Eckert: "Mister Link Ray! Talking about everything, I mean life, un.."
A.E.: "I am absolutely don´t care if all the guitarists in the world simply get extinct!"
Eckert: "You absolutely don´t care? I mean, It is remarkable that it´s those very people of whom you know exactly what they were like -well, you just have to take a look at Lou Reed- Now he´s (makes a pope salutation like gesture).. An Link Ray the same, but somewhere they must have got their experiences.."
A.E.: "Well, narcotics are bad, anyway!"
Eckert: "Are bad?"
A.E.: "yea.."
Eckert: "Awfully bad!"
A.E.: "Stimulating frees, anyway."
Eckert: "Stimulating frees? Well I can´t call that okay in this place, I must not, you know, just sit here and say "You all take some stimulants now!", but I mean,.."
Eckert: "That would be very bad!"
Eckert: "That would be bad, wouldn´t it? .. but there are those natural stimulants. Erm."
A.E.: "Prf.. uuuuh ermmmm.."
Eckert: "Um?"
A.E.: "Umm, errr"(Scratches his cheek)
Eckert: "Yupp, maybe we should watch the.. the charts now! And them something by Sonic Youth, an by then maybe we can of anything?"
A.E.: "May be.."
Eckert: (laughs)
(Break in the video)
Eckert: "So these were the charts, and after that something new by Sonic Youth. Do you know them? Andrew? What do you think of them? I think they are quite good!"
A.E.: "Oh, yeah." (nods confirmingly)
Eckert: "so, I also like "chiccone youth", that cover version"
A.E.: "Then I do so, too!"
Eckert: "Yes, Good? We´ll permitt them?"
A.E.: "Yupp!"
Eckert: "Do you have a list of favourite records , by the way? Are there any favourite records where you´d say you.."
A.E.: ""Funhouse" by The Stooges. And "Low" by David Bowie. And at the moment those bulgarian female choires"
Eckert: "Those bulgarian choirs, yes the really are good. And Books! Can you think os any favourite book spotaneously? Now don´t you say The satanic verses by Rushdie!"
A.E.: "No, I didn´t read it."
Eckert: "..didn´t read it."
A.E.: "Eliot! T.S. Eliot!"
Eckert: "Everything?"
A.E.: "Shakespeare is good, too. At the moment I read Milton. That´s a rather difficult read.*"
Eckert: "There is a movement in music of plagiators, who copy stuff to make something new of it. Under the heading of sampling. Is it legitimate if that happens in literature, too? What I´m saying is, do you feel inspired be such lyrics as your own lyrics?"
A.E.: "By the style, yes. Sometimes."
Eckert: "So, by the expression, the way of expression?"
A.E.: "Yes."
Eckert: "And that is a source for you where you get inspired."
A.E.: "Eliot allways is with me. In my head. And Shakespeare. Well, Englanders."
Eckert: "Englanders. When will you go back, do have any desire for negland after all?"
A.E.: "No, it´s become horrible. Too much H."
Eckert: "Too much H? So Link Ray is right after all?"
A.E.: (nods) "Quite!"
Eckert: "Quite.. And what else has become horrible about England?"
A.E.: "It´s become expensive as hell."
Eckert: "Yes?"
A.E.: "Yes."
Eckert: "So there is no desire to go back there?"
A.E.: "Naah.. Initially I was going to buy a new house at north england. But as I have no money.. Well.."
Eckert: "Allright, we´ll insert the account for donations in a minute if you all want that he gets a new house at northern england as well!"
A.E.: "Hm! Commerzbank Reeperbahn!"
Eckert: "And the number of the account has to be added. Perhaps there really will come some money!"
A.E.: "I don´t have it with me. But Mrs. Bremer at the Commerzbank Reeperbahn, she´s informed."
Eckert: "So the people only have to write to Mrs. Bremer at the Commerzbank Reeperbahn. That´s Spielbudenplatz I believe, and that´s Hamburg, er.."
A.E.: "..Nonono!"
Eckert: "Further down?"
A.E.: "At the other side."
Eckert: "The other side? That is.. Actually, what is that?"
A.E.: "Reeperbahn!"
Eckert: "Reeperbahn! Okay, Reeperbahn. It´ll arrive. Simply send it there. And that´s all for today´s Off Beat, I have some mor eby the Chainsaw Zombies. Do you know them?"
A.E.: "A good name!"
Eckert: "A good name, right? And they are good boys as well, unfortunately slightly groggy. They were supposed to appear here at a Hamburg stage, but the drummeress had half a pneumonia.. A drummeress! A very good girl. Anyway, I got them for an interview, short it was. Swedish boys are somehow difficult to handle, don´t you think? They either are fully stoned, or coming down, hangover style. Didn´t you notice that yet?"
(Andrew shakes his head with a very raised Eyebrow)
Eckert: "Okay, *ahem* The Chainsaw Zombies. And that´s all for today´s Off Beat with Andrew and with me, and I hope you enjoyed it. See, you, well, next week, well.."
A.E.: "..See you!"
Eckert: "See you."

*This last sentence is very quiet and difficult to understand, I am not sure if I heard it right.
Note: does anyone remember the name of that bulgarian choir? Was that Angelite?
Okay-done. Now to get a life. .. erm, any suggestions?

[eotunun]

Now there's a chat-up line!

Does having to look up in a dictionary what that line means have any connection to my clulessness about how or where to get a life?

[6FeetOver]

Note: does anyone remember the name of that bulgarian choir? Was that Angelite?

Yep! Love 'em! More info here. I didn't know that ol' Android was a fan, too. Guess I'm in rather good company, eh?