Bernard Manning
Posted: 18 Jun 2007, 17:03
Pegged it.
Page 1 of 1
Posted: 18 Jun 2007, 17:05
Beat me to it, just seen it on the news.
Posted: 18 Jun 2007, 17:21
Oh well he'll be missed.
Sorry!
Sorry!
Posted: 18 Jun 2007, 18:48
Berlimey
Posted: 18 Jun 2007, 20:19
I did a right old double take when the news was on - thought they were reliving one of my fave Spitting Image sketches for a minute...
Bernard Manning.....has.....farted. He was 63.
RIP, noxious bloke.
Bernard Manning.....has.....farted. He was 63.
RIP, noxious bloke.
Posted: 18 Jun 2007, 20:48
"There was this Jock, a Paddy and two Black fellas, this Fat Northern Git and uhhhhh........." Thud!
Next!
Next!
Posted: 18 Jun 2007, 23:21
Good ridance to one of the biggest oxygen thieves ever to tread upon a Northern club stage. What a fcuknut.
The nail in his coffin (pun intended) for me was the documentary of him doing a tour of India. It showed him up to be the pathetic arsewipe he really was.
Apart from that I really liked him.
The nail in his coffin (pun intended) for me was the documentary of him doing a tour of India. It showed him up to be the pathetic arsewipe he really was.
Apart from that I really liked him.
Posted: 19 Jun 2007, 09:58
Bernard Manning joke:
An elderly Yorkshire couple go on holiday to the Costas. It's the first time they've left the country, they're a bit set in their ways, and they don't know whether Bisto will be available in Spain.
"Whate'er tha dus luv, dun't ferget t'Bisto" says the old man.
Now when they arrive in Spain, unpacking at the hotel, and where's the Bisto? Of course it's nowhere to be found.
"Eh up luv, happen t'couple down t'corridor's English, Ah'll ask them."
He knocks on the door, and when it opens, says "Hast tha t'Bisto?"
The other man says, "sorry, I don't speak Spanish."
OK, in Manning's version, the punchline was "F*ck off you Spanish c*nt", but you get the idea.
An elderly Yorkshire couple go on holiday to the Costas. It's the first time they've left the country, they're a bit set in their ways, and they don't know whether Bisto will be available in Spain.
"Whate'er tha dus luv, dun't ferget t'Bisto" says the old man.
Now when they arrive in Spain, unpacking at the hotel, and where's the Bisto? Of course it's nowhere to be found.
"Eh up luv, happen t'couple down t'corridor's English, Ah'll ask them."
He knocks on the door, and when it opens, says "Hast tha t'Bisto?"
The other man says, "sorry, I don't speak Spanish."
OK, in Manning's version, the punchline was "F*ck off you Spanish c*nt", but you get the idea.
Posted: 19 Jun 2007, 10:44
no he doesn't he says "f**k off you spanish c**t" - at least that's how BM told it (apparently)
Posted: 19 Jun 2007, 11:02
Yeah. I know.
Just above, in tiny type, the line at the bottom, I wrote:OK, in Manning's version, the punchline was "F*ck off you Spanish c*nt", but you get the idea.
Posted: 20 Jun 2007, 15:09
Posted: 20 Jun 2007, 15:35
Good read that.James Blast wrote: Alexei Sayle: Bernard Manning and the tragedy of comedy
Posted: 20 Jun 2007, 15:38
He didn't bother me hugely. I found him occasionally funny, which puts him on a far higher plane than Russell Brand, Jo Brand, and Lenny Henry. Oh, and Julian Clary who is only funny when someone is scripting his lines for him.
I've heard plenty of lame acts from black comedians basically using the same jokes as Manning but beginning it with "Y'see,white people do THIS, but we blacks, we do THIS.." then screaming the punchline and spending the next ten minutes glad-handing the crowd who make noises like feeding time at the zoo. Dont see why one is edgy and the other is out-of-date mysoginist, racist, and every other "ist" buzzword floating about. =/
I've heard plenty of lame acts from black comedians basically using the same jokes as Manning but beginning it with "Y'see,white people do THIS, but we blacks, we do THIS.." then screaming the punchline and spending the next ten minutes glad-handing the crowd who make noises like feeding time at the zoo. Dont see why one is edgy and the other is out-of-date mysoginist, racist, and every other "ist" buzzword floating about. =/
Posted: 20 Jun 2007, 22:51
Quality avatar hom!
"One girl puked up her f**king pelvis on this stuff"
Funniest I've ever seen him.
"One girl puked up her f**king pelvis on this stuff"
Funniest I've ever seen him.