Heartland

>
> > A guy is driving around Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a
> > house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell
and the
> > owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes
into the
> > backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting there.
> > "You talk?" he asks.
> > "Yep," the Lab replies.
> > "So, what's your story?"
> > The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could
talk when I
> > was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told
the CIA
> > about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from
country
> > to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders,
because
> > no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of
their
> > most valuable spies for eight years running."
> > "But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I
wasn't
> > getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for
a job at
> > the airport to do some undercover security > wandering near
suspicious
> > characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible
dealings and was
> > awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of
puppies, and now
> > I'm just retired"
>
> The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he
wants
> for the dog.
>
> "Ten dollars," the guy says.
>
> "Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling
him so
> cheap?"
>
> "Because he's a liar. He never did any of that s**t.

HA!