Heartland

Ok, so I was browsing about the forum and noticed a 'womens only thread' now, what surprised me the most was not that it was blatantly sexist and in parts threatening acts of violence upon men, but they had nothing to say.

Guys it's true, put four women in a room and they have zero to talk about aside from make up, periods 'men' and their own short comings .

So guys, this is going to be open forum for MEN ONLY. Were we can find solace in one another and discuss subjects that are not only to high brow and confusing to women but are both fun and funny ( ever tried explaining a joke or a funny movie scene to a woman - it's torture)

So here it is guys a woman free zone. So sit back, put one hand down your pants (Al Bundy style) unbuckle your belts and open a cold one, put your feet on the coffee table and grab that remote and sit back and enjoy the silence of no women!!

Gentlemen... over to you.

I just released a crackin' air biscuit

I wonder which thread I should be in...

James Blast wrote:I just released a crackin' air biscuit

In terms of loudness and/or smell?

both, I aim to maim

Was out last night in the local "music pub".
I know the landlord, so he kept me in tequila & beer all night.
The girl from downstairs (Agi) was there & I can tell you what.
I wouldn't mind being her bar of soap.
She had her best friend with her (Bea) & she scrubs up nice too.
Gonna turn the music up now. She said it doesn't bother her, but the bass on this concert is seismic, so I reckon she'll be up soon. (Anyone seen that Howard Stern film?)

Oh & by the way, what's all that cinnamon & slice of orange crap with the tequila?
What's wrong with just necking it? In fact, why the glass?
Bollox to that fairy sh!te.
*scratches balls*

James Blast wrote:I just released a crackin' air biscuit

Coat.....

Never mind the coat, open the fcukin' window someone

I've got a slight buzz on and i'm thinking of boobies......................................and Star Wars



















Top Bloke Me

I nearly ordered a remote controlled dalek today at 4am after a lot of tequila


Lovely innit?
Couldn't see the buttons properly to place the order so I thought better of it.

After 15 years together ,I still can't read the wife's mind.
Yet she can read mine

Pat wrote:After 15 years together ,I still can't read the wife's mind.
Yet she can read mine

Not the same for me.
Still waiting for her to arrange for the Brazillian ladies beach volley ball team to visit.

Pista wrote:

Pat wrote:After 15 years together ,I still can't read the wife's mind.
Yet she can read mine

Not the same for me.
Still waiting for her to arrange for the Brazillian ladies beach volley ball team to visit.

Start small,try thinking about a cup of tea at the same time each day,even telling her at the start ,you'll soon have her trained.

Think we can have that window closed now?
It's getting cold.

Just popped my head into the women's only thread - I was looking for the bog. It's quite disturbing in there. They were talking about cutting each others hair and the whole place smelled of potpourri and I think one of them was even wearing ' Charlie' or Anais Anais.

Either way, I've got the footie on the telly, wearing me boxers and drinking Pepsi - Not diet or One cal or Max or Tab just ..Pepsi! considering adding a shot or two of jack to it but may wait til I'm watching Cloverfield on line later.

*content*

<----- floats another air biscuit

Boobies and Star Wars

Yeah. I got shot of my ball & chain for the afternoon.
She's gone to the lake for a walk with her friend.
So, I have the music thumping out at an "acceptable" level instead of the "library level" she enforces when at home.
It's not like the neihgbours complain . Ever.

I even asked one ( the hot one) last night & she said it didn't bother her.
Going to leave the loo seat up now...

@Weebles

weebleswobble wrote:

Boobies and Star Wars

The question is, would you want to see her in that costume now?

I'd do her tomorrow if she asked...

I'm off for a dump

Cake anyone?


"special" cake, that is.....

after all that air biscuiting I'm not surprised!

fook it, I'm skinning up