Heartland

A man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away.
She protested, "But we don't know anything about each other."
He replied, "That's all right, we'll learn about each other as we go
along."
So she consented, and they were married, and went on a
honeymoon to a very nice resort.
       
  One morning, they were lying by the pool when he got up took off his
towel, climbed up to the 10 metre board and did a two and a half tuck
 gainer, entering the water perfectly, almost without a ripple this was
 followed by a three rotations in jack-knife position before he again
straightened out and cut the water like a knife. After a few more
 demonstrations, he came back and lay down on his towel.
        
   She said, 'That was incredible!"
        
He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you
  we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along."
        
So she got up, jumped in the pool and started doing lenths. She was
moving so fast that the froth from her pushing off at one end of the
 pool would hardly be gone before she was already touching the other end of the pool. She did lenths in freestyle, breaststroke, even butterfly!
  
After about thirty lenths, completed in mere minutes, she climbed back out and lay down on her towel, barely breathing hard.
        
He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?"
        
"No" she said, "I was a prostitute in Govan and I worked both sides
of the Clyde."