Heartland

A man and a woman were sitting beside each other in the first class section of an airplane. The woman sneezed, took out a tissue, gently wiped her nose, and then visibly shuddered for 10-15 seconds.

The man went back to his reading. A few minutes later, the woman sneezed again, took a tissue, wiped her nose, then shuddered violently once more.

Assuming that the woman might have a cold, the man was still curious about the shuddering. A few more minutes passed when the woman sneezed yet again. As before she took a tissue, wiped her nose, her body shaking even more than before.

Unable to restrain his curiosity, the man turned to the woman and said, 'I couldn't help but notice that
you've sneezed 3 times, wiped your nose and then shuddered violently. Are you OK?'

'I am sorry if I disturbed you, I have a very rare medical condition. Whenever I sneeze I have an orgasm.'

The man, more than a bit embarrassed, was still curious. 'I have never heard of that condition before,' he said. 'Are you taking anything for it?'












The woman nodded, 'Pepper.'

I wish my lawn was emo so it would cut it self

whats the difference between an emo and a dead baby? the baby dosn't cry!


how many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?

3. One to replace it, & two to write a poem about how they miss the old one.

did you hear about that new emo pizza??? It cuts itself!

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, they like to cry/cut their wrists in the dark.

A punk with a rainbow-colored mohawk sits down on a bench next to an old man. After awhile, he notices the old man is staring at him. "What's wrong, old timer?" asks the punk, "Never done anything wild in your life?" "Actually," says the geezer, "One time I screwed a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son."

A Catholic teenager goes to confession, and after confessing to an affair with a girl is told by the priest that he can't be forgiven unless he reveals who the girl is. "I promised not to tell!" he says. "Was it Mary Patricia, the butcher's daughter?" the preist asks. "No, and I said I wouldn't tell." "Was it Mary Elizabeth, the printer's daughter?" "No, and I still won't tell!" 'Was it Mary Francis, the baker's daughter?" "No," says the boy. 'Well, son," says the priest, "I have no choice but to excommunicate you for six months." Outside, the boy's friends ask what happened. "Well," he says, "I got six months, but three good leads

How many emo kids does it take to paint a wall? It all depends on how many you throw at it!

how does a pizza cut itself?

Perhaps it can cut itself like you can on your acid wit Mr Blast

aye, very good

silentNate wrote:Perhaps it can cut itself like you can on your acid wit Mr Blast

Is that the real punchline? A bit of a let down if it is.