LOST TRIBE OF “THE CULT� DRUMMERS FOUND
Posted: 10 Jan 2011, 15:21
Scientists in the South Pacific have discovered an uncharted island inhabited entirely by drummers from eighties gothic rock band THE CULT.
It has long been a mystery to scientists as to the strange disapearences of THE CULT’s drummers, so much so that THE CULT’s drum stool had become known as THE ASTBURY TRIANGLE.
Since 1982 THE CULT have lost, on average, four drummers annually in mysterious circumstances.
Finally the mystery appears to have been solved. The Uncharted island, now known as Preston-Warner lies 200 miles west of Bali Ha'i in the inhospitable South Pacific Ocean.
The tribe is believed to have evolved from a bizarre and miraculous process whereby a single sex can reproduce, like what the dinosaurs do in JURASSIC PARK.
In a DISCOVERY CHANNEL documentary to be broadcast next month, the lost tribe of drummers known as the BRZEZICKI are seen living in their elevated huts known as “Rizers�, seeking out food known as “Riders� and worshipping their primitive Gods, “Paradiddle� and “Tomtom�.
When asked about the discovery, THE CULTs guitarist BILLY DUFFY commented “It’s all Astbury’s fault, the bastard!�
IAN ASTBURY, THE CULT’s lead singer was unavailable for comment, the bastard.
READ MORE HERE
It has long been a mystery to scientists as to the strange disapearences of THE CULT’s drummers, so much so that THE CULT’s drum stool had become known as THE ASTBURY TRIANGLE.
Since 1982 THE CULT have lost, on average, four drummers annually in mysterious circumstances.
Finally the mystery appears to have been solved. The Uncharted island, now known as Preston-Warner lies 200 miles west of Bali Ha'i in the inhospitable South Pacific Ocean.
The tribe is believed to have evolved from a bizarre and miraculous process whereby a single sex can reproduce, like what the dinosaurs do in JURASSIC PARK.
In a DISCOVERY CHANNEL documentary to be broadcast next month, the lost tribe of drummers known as the BRZEZICKI are seen living in their elevated huts known as “Rizers�, seeking out food known as “Riders� and worshipping their primitive Gods, “Paradiddle� and “Tomtom�.
When asked about the discovery, THE CULTs guitarist BILLY DUFFY commented “It’s all Astbury’s fault, the bastard!�
IAN ASTBURY, THE CULT’s lead singer was unavailable for comment, the bastard.
READ MORE HERE
