8-10-03 Fitbaw'

[James Blast]

Rangers manager Alex McLeish sends scouts out round the world looking
for a new striker to replace Michael Mols and hopefully win Rangers the
Champions League.


One of his scouts informs him of a young Iraqi striker who he thinks
will turn out to be a true superstar. So Alex flies to Iraq to watch him
and is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to Ibrox.

Two weeks later Rangers are 4-0 down at home to Man Utd with only 20
minutes left. McLeish gives the young Iraqi striker the nod to go on
and he takes off Michael Mols.

The lad is a sensation, scores 5 in 20 minutes and wins the game for
Rangers. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted
and the media love the new star.

When he comes off the pitch he phones his Mum to tell her about his
first day in Scottish football.

"Hi Mum, guess what?" he says. "I played for 20 minutes today, we were
4-0 down but I scored 5 and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the
players and the media, they all love me".

"Great," says his Mum, "let me tell you about my day. Your father got
shot in the street, your sister and I were assaulted and beaten and your
brother has joined a gang of looters, while you were having a great time".

The young lad is very upset. "What can I say Mum, but I'm so
sorry".....................

"Sorry!" says his Mum,

"It's your bl**dy fault that we moved to Glasgow in the first place!"

[Big Si]

[Izzy HaveMercy]

And....
What with the Blaine and Derren things going on, what about this:
The COPPERFIELD-BLAINE DEATHMATCH!
Be warned, it's a 5.20MB movie...
http://users.pandora.be/michael.minneke ... hmatch.mpg

IZZY.