Heartland

Jesus. Where do I start?

I guess it started back in May 2014 when my dad died. My mum and dad had been married for nearly 48 years when he went. My mum said "I always imagined us riding off in the sunset together." She is fiercely independent. I'm sure that I have a reputation as stubborn; I get that from her.

But increasingly over the last couple of years, as her sight has deteriorated to the point that she is now legally blind, she has become more vulnerable. We think that the blindness is beginning to cause her confusion by Charles Bonnet Syndrome Things came to a head a week or so ago when a stranger (and we still don't know who it was) found mum about a quarter of a mile from her bungalow, wearing no shoes, at about 1am. Thank fook he was a good Samaritan and he managed to get mum back to her house. It's not the first time mum has got lost outside, but it's the worst. I don't like to think about what might have happened. Dark nights, fast cars...

But anyway over the last few months, as we've become increasingly aware of her decline, my brother and I have been working to try to work out what is best for mum. This latest incident means that we rushed over this weekend. We have found a place in a local care home and pending them confimring that they can meet mum's needs, she can move in there really soon, hopefully even this week.

Normally I would have approached the Heartland Full Effect for support; I love you lot, even the ones I don't like but it's been such hard work trying to get mum somewhere safe that I haven't eben had the time to come on here.I promise to do better.

I’m really sorry to hear that. She’s lucky to have you and your brother nearby though. Some of the people working in those facilities can be absolutely wonderful. I had cause a few years back to spend more time than anyone would want to in a place like that, and I was favorably impressed by the staff. It’ll make all of your lives easier, even if it doesn’t feel that way at first.

Oh heck Mark. That's awful to hear.
Hopefully you have found the help she needs though & that can only be a good move.
I think the HL effect is in full force whether you're online or not so make sure you put family before goofing around on the intertubes & know the effect is there.
Take care & all the best wishes to your mum, you & your brother from here in deepest darkest Hungary.

Can't imagine what that must have been like, best wishes to your mum and you and your brother .

I'm extremely sorry to hear you've all been going through tough times mate, all things considered and in context you've managed to achieve a best case scenario. Your mum is now safe as anyone ever is, and all being well there'll be some very lovely people looking after her. Care homes get a bad rep, and often deservedly so, but there's much greater likelihood that your mum will be under the care of genuinely caring decent people, and be in the right place for her at this time in her life

Also, everything Steve said

Oh Mark. She's lucky to have the two of you. I hope she'll be settling in soon.
We'll always be here for you, and you have no need to do anything better.

all kids should look after their parents and society should look after its elderly but the fact is that mostly no know one does. you are a credit to her and i'm sure she knows it. love you bro.

Well we definitely have her a place. The hospital are keeping her in until she can move into the home.

It's a lovely little family-run place overlooking Morecambe Bay. She's really impatient to move in now!

Thanks folks for your support

Glad things are working out. These situations are really upsetting for everyone involved. Hopefully you ma will be happy in her new place.

Best wishes that all go well. Our thoughts be with you for a positive turn

That's really good news; I'll echo the sentiments of everyone else here, and I know it's a tough decision to have to make, but it's the right one, and with her welfare and care as the first interest.

I can only imagine how awful it must have been for you and your brother to find out your mum had been in such a vulnerable situation.
Sounds like you've found her a lovely place. I hope your mum will be happy there and your family have peace of mind knowing she is safe and being well cared for

Oh hell, no wonder you've been busy elsewhere, markfiend ... I also have to see to my aging parents far more often now (apart from other things needing my direct attention these days) ... *sigh ...

Anyway, it's good to hear that you and your brother managed to find a good solution to the best of everybody's health and concern, and above all, a solution that your mother heartily agrees to ... ... all the best wishes from here ... ...

Sending love and light to you, your Mum and your family x

Sounds nightmarish. All the best Mark.

She's moved in and is bossing everyone around. When I spoke to her she said she was loving it. It's such a relief.

markfiend wrote: ↑04 Oct 2022, 10:32 She's moved in and is bossing everyone around. When I spoke to her she said she was loving it. It's such a relief.

markfiend wrote: ↑04 Oct 2022, 10:32 She's moved in and is bossing everyone around. When I spoke to her she said she was loving it. It's such a relief.

That's great news

Perfect! ... ...

Bossing is good sign. Glad you found her such a good place. xx

Glad you have found a nice home for your mum. For your mum's safety and your peace of mind. May she be happy

I'm very glad to hear that your mum adjusted so well to her new situation.
All the best to you!