Heartland

... does wonders for your creativity. A subsidiary of the company I work for has recently launched a magazine about cricket. My boss was asking me the other day about some work I had done linking our supplier payments through to the BACS system (bear with me, the puncline's worth it) cos they want to set up a subscriptions database using BACS to collect direct debits. As this magazine is the brainchild of our MD (the guy who owns the whole shebang) and our Finance Director (my boss' boss), I was reluctant to say those immortal words: "Sounds like a piece of p!ss. When do they want it by?" But one pint of Beamish later...

Assuming I can think of a half plausible reason to come up with the acronym BAT, some fun could be had. They'd buy the name as it's obviously crickect related. And in a few weeks time I'd be able to email the office:

Could everyone please ensure they log out correctly tonight as we are going to release the BATs.

BACS automatic transfer (system)?

BACS is the Devils work !

Black Dahlia wrote:BACS is the Devils work !

its what gets my money from my employers into my bank account every month, and for that i like it

I used to work for Bacs as it happens (useless info for U)

I managed to get 3 pints down this lunchtime.
Nobody at work apart from me pretty much though, its boring.
Brought it a few CD's to listen to though.
Currently on Bowie's Greatest Hits!

Thrash Harry wrote:... Assuming I can think of a half plausible reason to come up with the acronym BAT, some fun could be had. They'd buy the name as it's obviously crickect related. And in a few weeks time I'd be able to email the office:

Could everyone please ensure they log out correctly tonight as we are going to release the BATs.

Banking Automated Transaction mate. Because even though I'll never read your email, I would love for you to be able to send it

Let us all know if you convinced them

Black Dahlia wrote:BACS is the Devils work!

Indeed. We recently received a letter from one of our smaller suppliers excusing their inability to comply with our request to send their invoices to us electronically because (and I paraphrase):

We do not use computers, much less the internet, since the Bible tells us that in the period leading upto the Judgement Day, there will be terrible advances in communications which the Devil will use to further his own ends.

I kid you not.

markfiend wrote:BACS automatic transfer (system)?

Mrs. Snowey wrote:Banking Automated Transaction

Well, yes, but BACS itself stands for Bankers Automated Clearing Services and I was thinking more of a name for the subscriptions database. I'm erring towards Billing And Ting...

Mrs. Snowey wrote:Let us all know if you convinced them

My boss seems to think it will distract us from more important work, but I won't let it lie!

I'm also chasing the job of stand in Unix system administrator, so I can issue the warning:

The Sun machine is coming down...

Edit: going/ coming

Thrash Harry wrote:

Black Dahlia wrote:BACS is the Devils work!

Indeed. We recently received a letter from one of our smaller suppliers excusing their inability to comply with our request to send their invoices to us electronically because (and I paraphrase):

We do not use computers, much less the internet, since the Bible tells us that in the period leading upto the Judgement Day, there will be terrible advances in communications which the Devil will use to further his own ends.

I kid you not.

@ Thrash Harry

To Semi-Quote "Monty Python"

"Bloody Christian's, Having Bloody Children, They Cant Afford To Bloody Feed! (Meaning Of Life - Glasgow Scene)

(Not offence meant to anyone - in particular Squirrels!)

Andy, do the orgasmic calculations in your by-line assume one each or mutiples for the ladies? Or are they more disappointingly realistic than that? Where are the mathematicians when you need them?

Thrash Harry wrote:Andy, do the orgasmic calculations in your by-line assume one each or mutiples for the ladies? Or are they more disappointingly realistic than that? Where are the mathematicians when you need them?

My Calculator is Dead, My Batteries are Flat, and I just cant think about AC/DC

My House of Pain contracted our 'corporate' printing to an outfit of Plymouth Brethren. For some bizarre reason (said outfit), will use the landline, but not fax, computers or mobiles.

OK, you figure that one out?

Their printing is flawless, but it takes 5 times longer to reach us.