Serious topic - depression

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
User avatar
Almiche V
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1385
Joined: 23 Apr 2003, 21:01
Location: Outta sight

Does anybody here have any experience of dealing with depression? I am very worried about a friend of mine. She goes through periods of isolating herself for days. I desperately want to help her but don't know what to do. I know I have her trust, but how can I help her more?

Thanks.

Snub.
To not know and to ask a question is a moment of embarrassment; to not know and not ask is a lifetime of shame.
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

Permenantly down snub but never to the extent of your friend.
I find doing something new and a bit out of the 'day to day' helps.
A rut can get all too comfy.
Other times, cajoling and hassling (uncomfortable, as it is) is the only way a good friend can pull the down friend out of their dwam.
It is a terrible disease.
And NO! Prozac is not an answer! (I speak not as a user but a former partner of a girl who was on the max. dose).
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
User avatar
Almiche V
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1385
Joined: 23 Apr 2003, 21:01
Location: Outta sight

Thanks Red. I need to have the courage to be a bit more assertive with her. I have known her for 9 months, and I'm only just starting to realise how deep her problem is. It's difficult to put sympathy to one side and be tough. I'll learn how to do it though.

Thanks again Red.
To not know and to ask a question is a moment of embarrassment; to not know and not ask is a lifetime of shame.
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

YW snub any other questions PM me.
Let's keep it private.
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
User avatar
Black Planet
Andrew's Love Goddess
Posts: 2170
Joined: 02 Jun 2003, 20:16

First dont' let her be alone for days.

Second, her first instinct is going to be to isolate her self.
You may try to come round and she may just tell you a lie, so she can be alone. You can't take no as an answer.

I know. I did the oh I'm fine, I'm tired blah blah.

Third, make sure she's NOT suicidal. Or in any way wanting to hurt herself.

I agree with Barman Blast on the drug thing. Although I know those type drugs help ppl.

Be kind, be gentle, and be assertive.

And most of all listen to her when she speaks to you. just listen and be a good shoulder for her to lean on.

.....and that's speaking from my EBG experience as a very unhappy girl.

good luck.
User avatar
Black Planet
Andrew's Love Goddess
Posts: 2170
Joined: 02 Jun 2003, 20:16

Red Sunsets wrote:YW snub any other questions PM me.
Let's keep it private.
Me too.
User avatar
Thrash Harry
Utterly Bastard Filthy
Posts: 1577
Joined: 13 May 2003, 20:56
Location: Over The Hill And Far Away
Contact:

My advice is GET THE FNCKING HELL OUT OF THERE BEFORE SHE DRAGS YOU DOWN WITH HER. But then, I'm just a selfish soul seeker, so what the hell do I know?
Go to sleep now, Francis.
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

Thrash Harry wrote:My advice is
not acceptable on this one Trash :|
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
User avatar
Black Planet
Andrew's Love Goddess
Posts: 2170
Joined: 02 Jun 2003, 20:16

Red Sunsets wrote:
Thrash Harry wrote:My advice is
not acceptable on this one Trash :|

agreed. especially since I WAS HER in another life.
User avatar
Thrash Harry
Utterly Bastard Filthy
Posts: 1577
Joined: 13 May 2003, 20:56
Location: Over The Hill And Far Away
Contact:

Been there. Done that. She's still doing it. And I've seen a few too many wrecks lying in the street behind her.
Go to sleep now, Francis.
User avatar
Black Planet
Andrew's Love Goddess
Posts: 2170
Joined: 02 Jun 2003, 20:16

bad man Harry, very bad mad. bp wags finger at mr harry.
User avatar
Thrash Harry
Utterly Bastard Filthy
Posts: 1577
Joined: 13 May 2003, 20:56
Location: Over The Hill And Far Away
Contact:

Mr Harru wabs vewy bad fingu bak.
Go to sleep now, Francis.
User avatar
Black Planet
Andrew's Love Goddess
Posts: 2170
Joined: 02 Jun 2003, 20:16

lmao... at Harry.....and yes..pished.

Waving finger ..
User avatar
Thrash Harry
Utterly Bastard Filthy
Posts: 1577
Joined: 13 May 2003, 20:56
Location: Over The Hill And Far Away
Contact:

But that's no excuse for not having an avatar is it?
Go to sleep now, Francis.
User avatar
Black Planet
Andrew's Love Goddess
Posts: 2170
Joined: 02 Jun 2003, 20:16

No it's not
User avatar
Thea
Overbomber
Posts: 2346
Joined: 13 Feb 2003, 12:29
Location: Aboard me ship....
Contact:

yeah... what's with the avatarlessness?
not run short of pics of z haveya?
O_O
ryan
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 851
Joined: 22 May 2003, 10:57

i think its some kind of revenge for johnny boy's avatarlessness
paint it black
Black, black, black & even blacker
Posts: 4966
Joined: 11 Jul 2002, 01:00

tell her to eat lots of chocolate. watch her gain weight, that'll give her something to be miserable about :twisted:

bi-polar is the only real worry, always miserable is just fine :lol: :lol: :cry: :cry: :lol: :lol: :cry: :cry: ;D :?
Goths have feelings too
User avatar
F*ck*As*Goth
Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 140
Joined: 14 Nov 2003, 19:30

Been there.. done that.... the full works... seroxat and all... pm me if you want some further information...
ryan
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 851
Joined: 22 May 2003, 10:57

as long as its an actual round of a depression and not something put on to gain sympathy and pity.... those are the worst. :x

if theres one thing i hate its a f**king attention seeker.
User avatar
Mrs RicheyJames
Overbomber
Posts: 4128
Joined: 10 Feb 2003, 00:33
Location: Rick Astley's house. Trying to find out why he chooses to look like Timsinister.

If you can get her to the doctors. If she really is depressed then she needs professional help. It's the only way!
Only a paand.
User avatar
Andie
Overbomber
Posts: 2886
Joined: 06 Jun 2003, 23:49

Yet again...depression rears it's ugly head

also been there done that...but unfortunately my depression is seasonal so it keeps on comming back/black...

there is no real cure...it's always there...lurking in the back of my mind...i know that by the time the clocks change back in the autumn i'll be sitting in the Doc's surgery getting more drugs...and then as the days lengthen during the following spring i'll be taking myself off of the medication...


there is very little you can do for a friend who is suffering from depression...except be there...be understanding...and alow them to cry with you...

be strong snubnose...this is the only time i'll post on this subject...i'll be available on PM all weekend...
User avatar
Dan
Overbomber
Posts: 2014
Joined: 25 Sep 2002, 01:00
Location: Leeds

Recently in a poll of the most depressing music, or music to listen to while you're depressed (I forget what it was exactly, it might have been a thread on this very forum), it transpired that when people are depressed they listen to depressing music. To me this was a crazy idea. If you're depressed then listen to some happy music and bounce around the room and you'll feel better than listening to some depressing sh!te.

So my advice is go round to her house and throw away all her (insert list of bands who make depressing sounding music)* records and get her to listen to something a bit happier.



*I actually typed a list here, but realised I'd piss off some people so edited it. :twisted:
User avatar
Andie
Overbomber
Posts: 2886
Joined: 06 Jun 2003, 23:49

Dan wrote:Recently in a poll of the most depressing music, or music to listen to while you're depressed (I forget what it was exactly, it might have been a thread on this very forum), it transpired that when people are depressed they listen to depressing music. To me this was a crazy idea. If you're depressed then listen to some happy music and bounce around the room and you'll feel better than listening to some depressing sh!te.

So my advice is go round to her house and throw away all her (insert list of bands who make depressing sounding music)* records and get her to listen to something a bit happier


*I actually typed a list here, but realised I'd piss off some people so edited it. :twisted:


not always the case for some of us Dan...

i can't get enough of Robert Smith and Ian Curtis when i'm feeling down
User avatar
Dan
Overbomber
Posts: 2014
Joined: 25 Sep 2002, 01:00
Location: Leeds

I don't get it though, surely that'd make you feel worse?
Post Reply