Heartland

Let's say that Andrew Eldritch and Crazy Frog have agreed to fight, perhaps due to larger legal issues involving a dispute over land ownership and/or destruction of the Leeds rainforest. Who wins, and why?

Further information:

Andrew has dressed up like a kung-fu Tintin to try and unsettle the Crazy Frog and gain a psychological advantage. Crazy Frog is a late replacement for Eldritch's original opponent, Joey DeMaio of Manowar, and has recently murdered at least three former members of Hot Gossip.

File photos:

Andrew Eldritch as kung-fu Tintin:


Novelty ringtone/accused multiple murderer, Crazy Frog:


Joey DeMaio and fellow literature enthusiast:

The Merciful Release Legal Department carpet bombs the entire area whilst AE has a fag and laughs.

Seriously - it's never just AE, you're up against Baxcorp! You think our Chairman's a dangerous insa...benevolent dictator? I shudder to consider the enormous power commanded by Eldritch Boulevard's head enforcer.

oooooooh - a yellow shirt tongues will wag

Anyway - would win hands down - I don't have to give a reason - we're on a fan site - nuff said (plus....... its a cartoon for f**k sake ).

tim, your analysis may be correct. Round one of this conflict may have gone to Mr. Eldritch.

...but who, I ask you, has the best lyrics? I propose an exploration of that issue by the most inefficient methods possible - first, the writing of lengthy dissertations filled with many curious logical inaccuracies, and then a game of Milton Bradley's Crossfire.

Lyrics by self-proclaimed "world's greatest lyricist" Andrew Eldritch:

I had everything within my reach
had money and stuff
each and every call
too much but never enough
tear it up and watch it fall

Lyrics by novelty ringtone Crazy Frog:

A ding ding ding ding dididing ding bing bing pscht,
Dorhrm bom bom bedom bem bom bedom bom bum ba ba bom bom,
Bouuuuum bom bom bedahm, Bom be barbedarm bedabedabedabeda
Bbrrrrrimm bbrrrrramm bbbrrrrrrrrraammmmm ddddddraammm,
Bah bah baah baah ba wheeeeeee-eeeee-eeeee!

Children's TV presenter and fallen angel Gaz Top has already come down on the side of the Crazy Frog. "Moomin" author/master of alchemy William Gibson, a longstanding Eldritch ally, is currently imprisoned in the infamous MAZE OF MADNESS for his alleged sexual assault of the "Maria" puppet from Stingray, and will therefore be unable to offer his opinion (whatever it may be.)

I'll have whatever he's taking.

The Knave wrote:Let's say that Andrew Eldritch and Crazy Frog...

no, let's not

thenkyew

There are somethings.

And there's The Knave.

timsinister wrote:I'll have whatever he's taking.

I won't.

timsinister wrote:I'll have whatever he's taking.

Gave that up years ago.

Together with crazy frog.

Or was that toads?

IZ.

The Knave wrote:

I'm getting that on a T-shirt.

Marvellous.

I don't know who you are, The Knave, but you are most CERTAINLY welcome to stay, despite the heresy of that image.

:lol::lol:

Does the frog follow the girls "into the mess that scalpels make" then? Would certainly get my seal of approval

The Knave wrote:

Just .

STOPPED DUE TO WRONG

Wrong trousers? Wrong turn? Wrong woman?

markfiend wrote:

The Knave wrote:

I'm getting that on a T-shirt.

Marvellous.

Absolutely

(......although my husband may kill me - the kids at his school are driving him mad with the frong song, so a tee may send him over the edge )

and all my good work is in vain...

James Blast wrote:and all my good work is in vain...

James Blast wrote:and all my good work is in vain...

Sorry ........ my only excuse demon drink

Black Alice wrote:

markfiend wrote:

The Knave wrote:

I'm getting that on a T-shirt.

Marvellous.

Absolutely

(......although my husband may kill me - the kids at his school are driving him mad with the frong song, so a tee may send him over the edge )

I WANT THAT T SHIRT - Quiff, cancel the HL shirts, we need all the
printers we can get!!

I did a better one.



I'll put it on a shirt in the next couple of days and see how it comes out. Then I'll wear it, regardless of the quality, and hope doing so leads to prosperity somehow.

MOTHEROFGODTHEPAIN

timsinister wrote:MOTHEROFGODTHEPAIN

You've lost me.