Poncey Cooking - issue 1

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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James Blast
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Chicken Filo Pie

serves 4
3lb/1.4kg chicken roasted and cooked
6oz/175g cream cheese
quarter pint/150ml double cream
8oz/225g button mushrooms wiped and sliced
salt and freshly ground black pepper
10 sheets filo pastry
4oz/100g butter, melted


Method
Remove meat from chicken and cut into strips.
Place in a 9ins ovenproof dish.
Mix cream cheese in a bowl.
Stir in mushrooms and season with salt and pepper.
Spoon over chicken.
Place 1 sheet of filo pastry on top of chicken and trim edges.
Brush with butter and repeat.
Cut remaining filo sheets into strips, one at a time, covering unused pastry with damp cloth.
Brush strips of pastry both sides with butter then place over chicken in a ribbon effect.
Repeat using all the pastry.
Cook at gas mark 4/350f, 180c for 35 mins. or until pastry is golden brown.
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
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James Blast
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Location: back from some place else

Ok Steven, and thanking you

dunno why you selected me, bitch! :|
was it the photies?


Mull Of Kintyre Soup
25g butter
2 red onions, peeled and chopped
1 desiree potato, peeled and chopped
1 cooking apple, peeled, cored and chopped
800ml chicken or vegetable stock
150g Mull Of Kintyre Cheddar cheese, grated
salt and freshly ground black pepper
chopped parsley to garnish

Method
fry the red onion in olive oil for 3 minutes
add the potatoes, apple and stock
bring to boil, turn down and let simmer for 20 minutes
season and let the soup cool for 15 minutes
-----
once cooled, blitz the mixture with an hand blender until almost a puree
stir in the grated cheese and gently reheat, but do not boil

serving
put the soup in warmed bowls garnished with the parsley

supplementary
this soup is delicious with fresh buttered oatcakes
a glass of red doesn't go amiss either
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
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Izzy HaveMercy
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For the Dutchies:

EEND OP ZWEEDSE WIJZE

1.) Koop een eend van ongeveer 5 kg voor 6 personen, twee grote flessen scotch whisky, spekreepjes en een fles olijfolie.
2.) De eend larderen met het spek en de binnenkant inwrijven met zout en peper.
3.) De oven voorverwarmen op 180 graden voor 10 minuten.
4.) Een long-drink glas voor de helft vullen met whisky.
5.) De whisky opdrinken gedurende het opwarmen van de oven.
6.) De eend op de muur...vuurvaste schotel leggen en een tweede glas whisky uitschenken.
7.) Het tweede glas whisky opdrinken en de eend in de oven plaatsen.
8.) Na 20 minuten de oven op 200 graden zetten en twee blazen bullen met bwhisky.
9.) De klazen opdlinken en de scherven van et ielste klas oplaapen.
10 ) Nog een aalff klas insjenke en opdlinke.
11.) Na en nalff uul de hoven opedoen om deent te sjekke.
12.) Blantwondezalf in de padkamer ganaale en oep de povekand van de rinkeland doen.
13.) Denove nesjot geve.
14.) Twi glose insjenke ven de twie flesse biski en tmiddeste glas opsoope.
15.) De nove opedoen na dieste bles bieskie leegis, en de sjotel vastpakke.
16.) De blandwondesalf op de binnekand van de twiejande doen en deent oeprape.
17.) Dander glase bisski oepdrinke.
18.) Deent nogis oeprape en met nen nantdoek de blantwondzalf van deent vege.
19.) Zen ande ontvette me bissky en den tuup salf twee kier oeprape.
20.) Tkapot glas opvege en deent terug inden ove zetten.
21.) Deent oprape en den ove opedoen.
22.) De twiede fles biskie opendoen en oeprape van de keukebloor.
23.) Opstaan van de bloer entvettig spek onder dekas vege.
24.) Nogis oepstan van de bloer en dan tochma blave zitte.
25.) De bles op de grond sette.
26.) Ban de teut drinke, de klase zen oep of kapot.
27.) Den ove afzette, doege toedoen en deniele nacht roenke.
28.) De volgende late voormiddag de eend aansnijden met het zilveren feestbestek en degusteren met citroenmayonaise.
29.) De ganse namiddag en vroege avond de rotzooi in de keuken opruimen en muren en plafond afwassen.
30.) De twee lege flessen naar de glasbol brengen en op de terugweg Perdolan en Maalox kopen.

IZ.
.
.
For Greater Good - Ambient Music for the Masses...
.
.
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more-sedatives-pls
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Makes me think of my mother-in-law, Iz!

:lol: :lol:
Immodium for the people
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Spigel
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Hallowe'en Barmbrack
From Wikipedia

Barmbrack is the center of an Irish Halloween custom. The Halloween Brack traditionally contained various objects baked into the bread and was used as a sort of fortune-telling game. In the barmbrack were: a pea, a stick, a piece of cloth, a small coin (originally a silver sixpence) and a ring. Each item, when received in the slice, was supposed to carry a meaning to the person concerned: the pea, the person would not marry that year; the stick, "to beat one's wife with", would have an unhappy marriage or continually be in disputes; the cloth or rag, would have bad luck or be poor; the coin, would enjoy good fortune or be rich; and the ring, would be wed within the year.

Ingredients:

250 g of white flour, 15g of dried baker's yeast, 50 g of fine white sugar, 100mL of warm milk, half a teaspoon of allspice or mixed cinnamon and nutmeg, half a teaspoon of salt, 1 small egg, 50g of unsalted butter, 50g of mixed peel, 60g of mixed raisins and sultanas.

Recipe

Soak the dried fruit overnight in weak tea, for an authentic taste!

Warm the milk a little, then stir the yeast and one teaspoon of the sugar into two tablespoonfuls of the milk, and let rise for ten minutes.

Melt the butter and let it cool.

Sift the flour, the allspice and the salt into a bowl, and add the rest of the sugar. Pour in the rest of the milk, and the yeast mixture as before.

Beat the egg with a fork, mix with the butter, add to the bowl, stir a little, and knead the mixture for 5 minutes until the dough is elastic and no longer sticks to the bowl. Cover with a wet cloth and let rise in a warm place for one hour.

Dry the mixed peel and fruit, chop the mixed peel up into small sections, roll in a little flour, add the mixed peel and the fruit and knead the mixture vigorously.

Butter a baking tin and spread the mixture evenly into it. Leave to rise for 30 minutes.

Heat the oven to 220°C, put the mixture in to bake for 25 minutes, then reduce the heat to 190 °C and bake a little longer.

Let the barmbrack repose for 15 minutes after taking it out of the oven before extracting it from the tin, and allow to cool thoroughly before cutting. Serve with tea and butter and a nice big spliff.

:D
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psichonaut
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@ James blast: when will you cook for us?
thanks...my Lord...i'm unbeliver
tear up your pants for psicho...and jump on him
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robertzombie
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mh
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Is this thread for Carpy, then? ;D
If I told them once, I told them a hundred times to put 'Spinal Tap' first and 'Puppet Show' last.
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boudicca
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Never fear, boudicca the domestic goddess is here! :P

*licks spoon suggestively*

This is my recipie for Chips au Pomme de Terre a la Coulis Piquante:wink:

*Take one unopened bag of Walkers Ready Salted Crisps (a Family size grab bag if you're cooking for guests).
*Open the bag, ensuring that all crisps remain inside the pack and don't go flying out and end up all over the floor. This may take some practice, but it's worth it.
*Take a small bottle of tabasco sauce out of your cupboard. You know, the one above the Aga.
*Sprinkle said condiment liberally over the crisps.
*Attack them with salt before the tabasco soaks into the crisps and makes them soggy.
*Give bag a darn good shake.
*Eat


;D 8)
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
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Planet Dave
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boudicca wrote:Never fear, boudicca the domestic goddess is here! :P

*licks spoon suggestively*

This is my recipie for Chips au Pomme de Terre a la Coulis Piquante:wink:

*Take one unopened bag of Walkers Ready Salted Crisps (a Family size grab bag if you're cooking for guests).
*Open the bag, ensuring that all crisps remain inside the pack and don't go flying out and end up all over the floor. This may take some practice, but it's worth it.
*Take a small bottle of tabasco sauce out of your cupboard. You know, the one above the Aga.
*Sprinkle said condiment liberally over the crisps.
*Attack them with salt before the tabasco soaks into the crisps and makes them soggy.
*Give bag a darn good shake.
*Eat


;D 8)
Cheers for that Claire. So, what did you need that spoon for exactly?
There is increasing evidence to suggest that Chris may have been being sarcastic.
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Syberberg
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Joined: 17 Feb 2006, 05:46
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Planet Dave wrote:
boudicca wrote:Never fear, boudicca the domestic goddess is here! :P

*licks spoon suggestively*

This is my recipie for Chips au Pomme de Terre a la Coulis Piquante:wink:

*Take one unopened bag of Walkers Ready Salted Crisps (a Family size grab bag if you're cooking for guests).
*Open the bag, ensuring that all crisps remain inside the pack and don't go flying out and end up all over the floor. This may take some practice, but it's worth it.
*Take a small bottle of tabasco sauce out of your cupboard. You know, the one above the Aga.
*Sprinkle said condiment liberally over the crisps.
*Attack them with salt before the tabasco soaks into the crisps and makes them soggy.
*Give bag a darn good shake.
*Eat


;D 8)
Cheers for that Claire. So, what did you need that spoon for exactly?
Dispensing justice... :innocent:
I don't necessarily agree with everything I think.
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boudicca
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Planet Dave wrote:
boudicca wrote:Never fear, boudicca the domestic goddess is here! :P

*licks spoon suggestively*

This is my recipie for Chips au Pomme de Terre a la Coulis Piquante:wink:

*Take one unopened bag of Walkers Ready Salted Crisps (a Family size grab bag if you're cooking for guests).
*Open the bag, ensuring that all crisps remain inside the pack and don't go flying out and end up all over the floor. This may take some practice, but it's worth it.
*Take a small bottle of tabasco sauce out of your cupboard. You know, the one above the Aga.
*Sprinkle said condiment liberally over the crisps.
*Attack them with salt before the tabasco soaks into the crisps and makes them soggy.
*Give bag a darn good shake.
*Eat


;D 8)
Cheers for that Claire. So, what did you need that spoon for exactly?
Use yer imagination :twisted:
Actually scrap that... I know what your imagination's like! :eek: :lol:

It's funny, this cooking lark... at present my talents really don't extend much beyond the above "recipie", but something began to stir inside earlier this year. I got a culinary urge, shall we say, and started checking out foodie sites online... I think I will become one of those people who sources all her food organically at a local farmer's market one of these days. Perhaps sooner rather than later. And rustles up things with butternut squash in them to keep in the fridge and heat up once she's brought Tarquin and Hermione back from school :P
There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets
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emilystrange
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lemon chicken...
chicken breasts, fry in pan until done and going golden. put in oven dish. pour over at least 3/4 lemon per breast. cook at about 190 C for 15-20 mins.
serve with salad, new pots, and/or fresh bread.
I just can't keep living on dreams no more
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Is it wrong that I saw "lemon" before "breasts"?
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emilystrange
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well at your age, maybe...
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I'm a teenage male, Miss. I'm a little worried. :lol:
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EvilBastard
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emilystrange wrote:pour over at least 3/4 lemon per breast.
Can I substitute whiped cream for lemon here? :lol:
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
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emilystrange
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eeughhh. depends how you like your chicken... *snork*
I just can't keep living on dreams no more
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mh
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EvilBastard wrote:
emilystrange wrote:pour over at least 3/4 lemon per breast.
Can I substitute whiped cream for lemon here? :lol:
Mind you don't sprain your wrist - ah - shaking the cream, EB. :lol:
If I told them once, I told them a hundred times to put 'Spinal Tap' first and 'Puppet Show' last.
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6FeetOver
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:eek:
I left my heart in Ballycastle... :cry: :cry: :cry:
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Obviousman
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Izzy HaveMercy wrote:For the Dutchies:

EEND OP ZWEEDSE WIJZE

1.) Koop een eend van ongeveer 5 kg voor 6 personen, twee grote flessen scotch whisky, spekreepjes en een fles olijfolie.
2.) De eend larderen met het spek en de binnenkant inwrijven met zout en peper.
3.) De oven voorverwarmen op 180 graden voor 10 minuten.
4.) Een long-drink glas voor de helft vullen met whisky.
5.) De whisky opdrinken gedurende het opwarmen van de oven.
6.) De eend op de muur...vuurvaste schotel leggen en een tweede glas whisky uitschenken.
7.) Het tweede glas whisky opdrinken en de eend in de oven plaatsen.
8.) Na 20 minuten de oven op 200 graden zetten en twee blazen bullen met bwhisky.
9.) De klazen opdlinken en de scherven van et ielste klas oplaapen.
10 ) Nog een aalff klas insjenke en opdlinke.
11.) Na en nalff uul de hoven opedoen om deent te sjekke.
12.) Blantwondezalf in de padkamer ganaale en oep de povekand van de rinkeland doen.
13.) Denove nesjot geve.
14.) Twi glose insjenke ven de twie flesse biski en tmiddeste glas opsoope.
15.) De nove opedoen na dieste bles bieskie leegis, en de sjotel vastpakke.
16.) De blandwondesalf op de binnekand van de twiejande doen en deent oeprape.
17.) Dander glase bisski oepdrinke.
18.) Deent nogis oeprape en met nen nantdoek de blantwondzalf van deent vege.
19.) Zen ande ontvette me bissky en den tuup salf twee kier oeprape.
20.) Tkapot glas opvege en deent terug inden ove zetten.
21.) Deent oprape en den ove opedoen.
22.) De twiede fles biskie opendoen en oeprape van de keukebloor.
23.) Opstaan van de bloer entvettig spek onder dekas vege.
24.) Nogis oepstan van de bloer en dan tochma blave zitte.
25.) De bles op de grond sette.
26.) Ban de teut drinke, de klase zen oep of kapot.
27.) Den ove afzette, doege toedoen en deniele nacht roenke.
28.) De volgende late voormiddag de eend aansnijden met het zilveren feestbestek en degusteren met citroenmayonaise.
29.) De ganse namiddag en vroege avond de rotzooi in de keuken opruimen en muren en plafond afwassen.
30.) De twee lege flessen naar de glasbol brengen en op de terugweg Perdolan en Maalox kopen.

IZ.
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Still marvellous that one, one of the first mail-jokes ever recieved here :D
Styles are a lie.

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6FeetOver
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In my head, it sounds like the Swedish Chef from The Muppet Show... :lol: :P


Yeah, yeah, I know... ;)
I left my heart in Ballycastle... :cry: :cry: :cry:
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Brideoffrankenstein
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boudicca wrote:It's funny, this cooking lark... at present my talents really don't extend much beyond the above "recipie", but something began to stir inside earlier this year. I got a culinary urge, shall we say, and started checking out foodie sites online... I think I will become one of those people who sources all her food organically at a local farmer's market one of these days. Perhaps sooner rather than later. And rustles up things with butternut squash in them to keep in the fridge and heat up once she's brought Tarquin and Hermione back from school :P
I knew there was a Nigella in there somewhere :lol: :lol: :lol:

I make this fairly regularly -

Garlic, chick pea and spinach soup

30ml olive oil
4 garlic cloves
1 onion, roughly chopped
2 tsp ground cumin
2tsp ground coriander
2 pints vegetable stock
350g potatoes, chopped
425g canned chick peas, drained
1bsp cornflour
1/4 pint double cream
200g spinach
2tbsp tahini
salt and pepper
cayenne pepper

1. Heat the oil in a large saucepan and cook the garlic for 5 minutes or until golden brown.

2. Stir in the cumin and coriander and cook for a further minute.

3. Pour in the stock and add the chopped potatoes to the pan. Bring to the boil and simmer for 10 minutes. Add the chick peas and simmer for a further 5 minutes, or until both the potatoes and chick peas are tender.

4. Blend together the cornflour, cream, tahini and plenty of seasoning. Stir into the soup with the spinach. Bring to the boil, stirring, and simmer for a further 2 minutes. Season with cayenne pepper, salt and black pepper. Serve sprinkled with a little cayenne pepper.
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