Nov 2 06

NEW RULES: One thread per day only. If there's a thread for today already started, post on that. And if there isn't? Then you get to start one. Aren't you the lucky one?
Post Reply
User avatar
EvilBastard
Overbomber
Posts: 3934
Joined: 01 Feb 2006, 17:48
Location: Where the Ruined Tower shouts

Q. Why are there no jokes about the Jonestown Massacre?




























































You really won't like it...




































































Really, you won't




















































































Don't say I didn't warn you...





















































A. Because the punchline's too long

Coat!!
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
Top
User avatar
Obviousman
Outside the Simian Flock
Posts: 7090
Joined: 22 Aug 2004, 12:14
Location: Soon over Babaluma
Contact:
Contact Obviousman

I always like jokes that warn me I won't like them :lol:
Styles are a lie.

My Facebook/My Flickr
Top
User avatar
scotty
Overbomber
Posts: 4880
Joined: 10 Jun 2005, 23:03
Location: Behind the Door.........

I've made me an Advent Calendar for Christmas this year :twisted:

Clicky.
Being brave is coming home at 2am half drunk, smelling of perfume, climbing into bed, slapping the wife on the arse and saying,"right fatty, you're next!!"
Top
User avatar
weebleswobble
Underneath the Rock
Posts: 5875
Joined: 09 Feb 2006, 06:57
Location: The Bat-Milk Cave
Contact:
Contact weebleswobble

I want one (for the twins :lol: )
‎"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
Top
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

Beautiful man! :lol:
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
Top
User avatar
Big Si
School Bully
Posts: 6747
Joined: 19 Nov 2002, 00:00
Location: Glesga Central

scotty wrote:I've made me an Advent Calendar for Christmas this year :twisted:

Clicky.
:notworthy: :notworthy: :notworthy:

:D
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
Top
User avatar
eotunun
Overbomber
Posts: 3730
Joined: 06 Aug 2005, 22:24
Location: (X,Y,Z)(t)=huh!²

scotty wrote:I've made me an Advent Calendar for Christmas this year :twisted:

Clicky.
Can I have one for Whiskey bottles? ;D :innocent:
"These are my principles! And if you don't like the just says so, I have others, too!"
~Rufus T. Firefly
Top
User avatar
bushman*pm
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 875
Joined: 11 Feb 2006, 17:21
Location: THE BLACK HOLE OF LONDON

scotty wrote:I've made me an Advent Calendar for Christmas this year :twisted:

Clicky.
:lol: :lol:
is that just one beer a day?
sounds a little lightweight to me!!
:lol: :lol:
LAND ROVER: THE BEAST FOUR BY FOUR BY FEAR! KICKS THE ARSE OFF RICEBURNERS!
Top
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

bushman*pm wrote:sounds a little lightweight to me!!
never thought of that

Agreed, Bunch of Arse! Keith ;D
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
Top
User avatar
scotty
Overbomber
Posts: 4880
Joined: 10 Jun 2005, 23:03
Location: Behind the Door.........

James Blast wrote:
bushman*pm wrote:sounds a little lightweight to me!!
never thought of that

Agreed, Bunch of Arse! Keith ;D
:eek: YER ERSE!!!!!, you've seen me sink the pints Blast :wink: :lol:
Being brave is coming home at 2am half drunk, smelling of perfume, climbing into bed, slapping the wife on the arse and saying,"right fatty, you're next!!"
Top
User avatar
scotty
Overbomber
Posts: 4880
Joined: 10 Jun 2005, 23:03
Location: Behind the Door.........

Any way,
What about the Octopus that goes into the pub and says to the Barman, "I bet you I can play any instrument you can mention", the Barman points to a Guitar in the corner.

The Octopus picks up the Guitar and low and behold, plays better than Jimmy Hendrix

The Barman then points the Octopus in the direction of the Piano,

the octopus hops up on the stool and batters out a few tunes the Elton John would be proud of

The Barman then throws a set of Bag Pipes to the Sea Creature and says,

"Right then smart Arse..........let's see you get a tune out of them!"

After about Twenty minutes of writhing around on the Bar Room floor the Barman pipes up,

"You're not having much luck playing that, are you?!"

"Playing it!?", replies the Octopus,

"As soon as I can get the pyjamas of her, I'm going to shag this Bitch!". :innocent:
Being brave is coming home at 2am half drunk, smelling of perfume, climbing into bed, slapping the wife on the arse and saying,"right fatty, you're next!!"
Top
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

Next!
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
Top
User avatar
EvilBastard
Overbomber
Posts: 3934
Joined: 01 Feb 2006, 17:48
Location: Where the Ruined Tower shouts

scotty wrote: :eek: YER ERSE!!!!!, you've seen me sink the pints Blast :wink: :lol:
I've seen you sink pints too, Keith, but not of anything alcoholic... :innocent:
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
Top
User avatar
James Blast
Banned
Posts: 24699
Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
Location: back from some place else

WTF! :eek:
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
Top
User avatar
eotunun
Overbomber
Posts: 3730
Joined: 06 Aug 2005, 22:24
Location: (X,Y,Z)(t)=huh!²

James Blast wrote:WTF! :eek:
Douglass Adams wrote:There is a theory which says that once you understand the world it vanishes and gets replaced by something even more grotesque. Another theory says that this allready happened several times.
Q.E.D.
"These are my principles! And if you don't like the just says so, I have others, too!"
~Rufus T. Firefly
Top
User avatar
bushman*pm
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 875
Joined: 11 Feb 2006, 17:21
Location: THE BLACK HOLE OF LONDON

scotty wrote:
James Blast wrote:
bushman*pm wrote:sounds a little lightweight to me!!
never thought of that

Agreed, Bunch of Arse! Keith ;D
:eek: YER ERSE!!!!!, you've seen me sink the pints Blast :wink: :lol:
MILK dont count round these ere partz!
:lol: :lol:
LAND ROVER: THE BEAST FOUR BY FOUR BY FEAR! KICKS THE ARSE OFF RICEBURNERS!
Top
User avatar
bushman*pm
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 875
Joined: 11 Feb 2006, 17:21
Location: THE BLACK HOLE OF LONDON

James Blast wrote:WTF! :eek:
sorry Sir JB, but that really is toooooooooo much!
cant even call it one for the ladeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzz!
LAND ROVER: THE BEAST FOUR BY FOUR BY FEAR! KICKS THE ARSE OFF RICEBURNERS!
Top
Post Reply

Return to “Joke of the Day”