Saddam Hussein is hiding in Scotland?

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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Big Si
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:eek: :eek: :eek:

Saddam a fan of Scottish football

SADDAM Hussein may remain in hiding, but wherever he is, the deposed Iraqi leader is crossing off the days until the Scottish Premier League (SPL) kicks off on Saturday, according to bizarre claims by Giovanni Di Stefano, the controversial new director of Dundee FC.

The man who counts war criminals and serial killers among his associates will this week arrive in Scotland to be formally unveiled as a new board member of the SPL club.

Yesterday, Mr Di Stefano declared that Saddam, whom he has met three times, is a major fan of Scottish football.

Mr Di Stefano was keen to play down talk of a friendship existing between the pair, although he called the fallen leader, who has a $25 million bounty on his head, a "nice man". He enjoyed a very Scottish diet of both whisky and SPL football, Mr Di Stefano added.

"Saddam is not my pal," said the man who has also formed links in the past with the notorious Serbian warlord and alleged war criminal Zeljko "Arkan" Raznatovic, who was assassinated in 2000.

"A pal is someone who you go drinking with," said Mr Di Stefano. "I have met him only three times in my life. He is a very nice man. He likes whisky, he likes football. He watches the SPL. He does! You can get the games in Iraq. He watches football from all over the world. But because we shared this passion does not mean we are pals. I have met [Yasser] Arafat. He is not a pal. I have met [Bill] Clinton. He is hardly a pal."

Mr Di Stefano has also advised the former Yugoslav president Slobodan Milosevic on his prosecution for war crimes at the International Criminal Tribunal, in The Hague.

A criminal lawyer who has himself spent time in jail, he is currently involved through his law firm, Studio Legale Internazionale, in the appeals of the convicted serial killer Harold Shipman, and Kenneth Noye, sentenced in April 2000 to life in prison for the road-rage murder of Stephen Cameron.

He insisted such relations have been formed due to his job requirements. "I would only deal with Snow White if she was being accused of perverting the seven dwarves," he said.

Yesterday, he was due to meet Linda Calvey, the woman more commonly known as "the Black Widow" after being convicted in 1991 of murdering one husband having seen another shot dead by a policeman. "If I did not represent them, someone else will," he reasoned. "And everyone has a right to be represented."

Mr Di Stefano is fighting off suggestions he is unfit to be a director of a leading Scottish football club. He has spent 395 days in jail since first being linked with Dundee, in 1999. He was released on appeal after what the judge called a "massive abuse of process" in a fraud charge. He has since received compensation from the British government.

"I have forgotten about it," he said of his time in jail. "The ordeal is now over. I stood my ground, and I will do the same for Dundee."

He has indeed remained remarkably loyal to the club, although he only saw them play for the first time at the Scottish Cup final against Rangers in May. A storm of protest after his original link with the club four years ago saw him temporarily divert his interest elsewhere, though attempts to gain controlling interests in Norwich City and Northampton Town also ended in failure. It was, however, in Northampton where the Anglo-Italian, who was brought up in Northamptonshire, once again made contact with Dundee - they played in the town on Saturday in a pre-season friendly. Mr Di Stefano watched the game with his son Milan, a former pupil at Gordonstoun school. Milan first alerted his father to Dundee, forming an attachment to the club during his time at boarding school in Scotland.

"The kid has a lot of flair," said Mr Di Stefano. "He has the instinct. If he did not have it he would be what I call a ponce." His 18-year-old son left Gordonstoun two years ago, the school cited non-payment of fees as the reason for his removal. Mr Di Stefano is contesting this, and has accused the school of racism.

The affair has not dulled his passion for Scotland and for Dundee, nor have Dundee been put off by the continued bad publicity bound to be attracted by links with Mr Di Stefano. Some fans visiting the club's official website expressed reservations about the renewed link-up between their club and Mr Di Stefano. "Dundee FC should have nothing to do with this man," wrote one visitor. "The Marr brothers [the present owners] have been great for the club, but this is just wrong."

Jim Connor, the commercial director at Dens Park, was in Northampton on Saturday to make Mr Di Stefano the offer of joining the Dundee board.

"He is always going to be a controversial character," Mr Connor said yesterday. "That won't change. But he is a barrister of high repute. If he is in the top law courts every day then what is the problem him being involved with Dundee?"

The Dens Park club have received assurances from both the SPL and Scottish Football Association that the move prompts no argument from them.

Mr Di Stefano aims to remain a part of Dundee for the duration, claiming a m*****n designed to "shake Rangers and Celtic from the top of the tree". He will not reveal how much money he will pump into the club, which last year announced losses of £2.5million.

"If I can buy £100 worth of groceries, I consider myself rich," he said. "I work hard for what I have. I have been lucky. I have five children, and I sense a good clear road ahead. This involvement with Dundee will be a family holding, which my children will inherit from me. If not, I will haunt them from the grave."
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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Black Planet
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Very scary indeed!
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Thea
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my dad looks like saddam. i might hand him in for the cash...
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d00mw0lf wrote:my dad looks like saddam. i might hand him in for the cash...
Hummmmm, the going rate for Saddams kids is about $30 million, maybe I'll hand YOU in ;) ;) ;)
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Thea
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Chairman Bux wrote:
d00mw0lf wrote:my dad looks like saddam. i might hand him in for the cash...
Hummmmm, the going rate for Saddams kids is about $30 million, maybe I'll hand YOU in ;) ;) ;)
they'd soon get sick of me and let me go ;D
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d00mw0lf wrote:
Chairman Bux wrote:
d00mw0lf wrote:my dad looks like saddam. i might hand him in for the cash...
Hummmmm, the going rate for Saddams kids is about $30 million, maybe I'll hand YOU in ;) ;) ;)
they'd soon get sick of me and let me go ;D
i'm not surprised if you smell THAT bad ;) :urff:

:D
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Chairman Bux
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That'd be ok, I can spend money very very quickly when I have to, just ask ...................

;)

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they might notice i don't look like one of his kids though...
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Chairman Bux
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As long as I can get photos of you and your dad together in a family related shot I'll get my money, I will be dealing with americans after all ;)

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It occurs to me that it's possible that guy's just crazy.

I'll wait to be proved wrong...
"You do realize you're talking to a man with a human head in his hands who has every intention of using it to beat these people to death?"
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Chairman Bux
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I though Si seemed quite sensible, providing he's from the better half of the free state that is...

CB
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Chairman Bux wrote:As long as I can get photos of you and your dad together in a family related shot I'll get my money, I will be dealing with americans after all ;)

CB
i'm kind of unphotographable....
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Yah, and unforgetable, that's what you are....... ;)

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Chairman Bux wrote:I though Si seemed quite sensible, providing he's from the better half of the free state that is...

CB
The last person who called me sensible, next saw me with my head shaved. They were very very scared :eek:

:twisted:
Wyrd bið ful aræd...

mybelgiannemesis
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