HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.
FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave...without the princess.
VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.
GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her.Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
GRIND METAL
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...
DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
GOTHIC METAL
The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duett by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell's eternity.
PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the HEAVY METAL protagonist.
INDUSTRIAL METAL
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes anobscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are
still looking for the one who did this.
CHRISTIAN METAL
The protagonist rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to 'thank' the protagonist he replies, "sorry, but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."
GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.
BATTLE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The princess gets bored.
NU METAL
The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
EMO
The protagonist sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him, he gets eaten. The princess
is very happy, because he was a whiny fag anyway.
*Borrowed from Freak* apparently
28th Aug - Metal for Muthas
-
Izzy HaveMercy
- The Worlds Greatest Living Belgian
- Posts: 8844
- Joined: 29 Jan 2002, 00:00
- Location: Long Dark Forties
- Contact:
Classic and still good, especially:
PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the HEAVY METAL protagonist.
IZ.
PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the HEAVY METAL protagonist.
IZ.
-
HisWimmNess
- Amphetamine Filth
- Posts: 165
- Joined: 07 Jul 2002, 01:00
- Location: belgium
- Contact:
brilliant 
nostalgy ain't what it used to be
-
James Blast
- Banned
- Posts: 24699
- Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
- Location: back from some place else
I already did this one 
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
-
smiscandlon
- Overbomber
- Posts: 2595
- Joined: 05 Feb 2004, 23:52
Perhaps all Joke of the Day posts should start with the preamble "Stop me if you've heard this one before..."Pat wrote:Perhaps the thread title should be Joke of the Day RevisitedJames Blast wrote:I already did this one
A good joke it always worth repeating.
анархия
-
James Blast
- Banned
- Posts: 24699
- Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
- Location: back from some place else
aye, but this one is guaranteed more replies than a Blast topic - FACT!
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
-
James Blast
- Banned
- Posts: 24699
- Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
- Location: back from some place else
see what I mean 
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
Edited for having done damage to a friend.
Sorry chumy.
Sorry chumy.
Last edited by eotunun on 28 Aug 2007, 22:13, edited 1 time in total.
"These are my principles! And if you don't like the just says so, I have others, too!"
~Rufus T. Firefly
~Rufus T. Firefly
-
smiscandlon
- Overbomber
- Posts: 2595
- Joined: 05 Feb 2004, 23:52
Guilty by complicity.
Last edited by smiscandlon on 28 Aug 2007, 22:34, edited 1 time in total.
анархия
-
James Blast
- Banned
- Posts: 24699
- Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
- Location: back from some place else
get bent jumlaut
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
Sorry Mr B...but you may have noticed I haven't been frequenting this place over the last year (not a lot to laugh about)
Imitation is the sincerest form of whatsit
the things you have to do to placate a body.....
Imitation is the sincerest form of whatsit
the things you have to do to placate a body.....
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else
-
weebleswobble
- Underneath the Rock
- Posts: 5875
- Joined: 09 Feb 2006, 06:57
- Location: The Bat-Milk Cave
- Contact:
I'll laugh just as hard the next time someone posts it....
‎"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
-
James Blast
- Banned
- Posts: 24699
- Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
- Location: back from some place else
here ye go...
HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.
FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave...without the princess.
VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.
GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her.Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
GRIND METAL
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...
DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
GOTHIC METAL
The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duett by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell's eternity.
PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the HEAVY METAL protagonist.
INDUSTRIAL METAL
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes anobscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are
still looking for the one who did this.
CHRISTIAN METAL
The protagonist rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to 'thank' the protagonist he replies, "sorry, but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."
GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.
BATTLE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The princess gets bored.
NU METAL
The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
EMO
The protagonist sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him, he gets eaten. The princess
is very happy, because he was a whiny fag anyway.
HEAVY METAL
The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.
POWER METAL
The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.
THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.
FOLK METAL
The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave...without the princess.
VIKING METAL
The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.
DEATH METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.
BLACK METAL
The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.
GORE METAL
The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her.Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.
GRIND METAL
The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...
DOOM METAL
The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.
GOTHIC METAL
The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duett by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly he swallows up the pipe and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell's eternity.
PROGRESSIVE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the HEAVY METAL protagonist.
INDUSTRIAL METAL
The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes anobscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.
SPEED METAL
Suddenly there, short solo, dragon is confused, someones screaming weird stuff, princess realizes she's been deflowered, dragon and princess are
still looking for the one who did this.
CHRISTIAN METAL
The protagonist rides in on his way home from church and sings a mushy power ballad to the dragon about how much Jesus loves him and that the dragon should turn to Him. The Dragon is immediately converted, and when the princess wants to 'thank' the protagonist he replies, "sorry, but I don't believe in having sex before marriage."
GLAM METAL
The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.
BATTLE METAL
The protagonist arrives with a legion of a hundred brave footman, war chariots and a dozen elite warriors and, as a master tactician, flanks the dragon in a bloody siege that lasts six hours. The princess gets bored.
NU METAL
The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.
EMO
The protagonist sees the dragon and moans about how hard it will be to get the princess to fall in love with him, he gets eaten. The princess
is very happy, because he was a whiny fag anyway.
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
-
weebleswobble
- Underneath the Rock
- Posts: 5875
- Joined: 09 Feb 2006, 06:57
- Location: The Bat-Milk Cave
- Contact:
Not quite waht I meant Mr Blast, but please post away.....
‎"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
-
smiscandlon
- Overbomber
- Posts: 2595
- Joined: 05 Feb 2004, 23:52
анархия
OOOOH YOU GREAT BIG FIB BOX!!!! Making out you're the funny typerer of jokes...James Blast wrote:I already did this one
http://www.myheartland.co.uk/viewtopic.php?t=10549
I wasted an apology on you when it should have gone to Ms Docre.....Shame on you Mr B
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else
-
James Blast
- Banned
- Posts: 24699
- Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
- Location: back from some place else
<----slinks off
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
-
James Blast
- Banned
- Posts: 24699
- Joined: 11 Jun 2003, 18:58
- Location: back from some place else
what I do remember (after much addled brain raking) Ness, was that I posted it on another 'nicey nicey' 70s forum and was nearly banned for it!
I'm a Mod there now
it's still a bit too 'nice' for me, but hey! I keep the spammers at bay
I'm a Mod there now
it's still a bit too 'nice' for me, but hey! I keep the spammers at bay
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
~ Peter Steele
Well, if we're going to be able to claim that excuse...I'll have the 'prawn joke' then.....James Blast wrote:what I do remember (after much addled brain raking) Ness, was that I posted it on another 'nicey nicey' 70s forum and was nearly banned for it!
[/size]
Five cups of coffee just to be myself...when I'd rather be somebody else