3-10-07 Do not talk to my Parrot

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Pat
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Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check ."

"Oh, by the way don't worry about my dog Spike. He won't bother you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!" "I REPEAT; DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!"

When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking dog he has ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.
Image
The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling. Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled,

"Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!"
Image


To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"
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more-sedatives-pls
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totally didn't see that one comin' :D :lol:

poor chap ;D
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bushman*pm
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more-sedatives-pls wrote:totally didn't see that one comin' :D :lol:

poor chap ;D
Soooooo totally seconded, dudes!
:notworthy: to the power of :notworthy: to you both!
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smiscandlon
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more-sedatives-pls wrote:totally didn't see that one comin' :D :lol:
I did, here's why.

I think I have a behavioural problem with regards to Joke of the Day. I have a tendency to skip to the end of the post, read the punchline, and if it's funny then I go back and read the joke.

Should I seek help? :?
анархия
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weebleswobble
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smiscandlon wrote:
Should I seek help? :?
For all manner of things :wink:
‎"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
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Izzy HaveMercy
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smiscandlon wrote:I think I have a behavioural problem with regards to Joke of the Day. I have a tendency to skip to the end of the post, read the punchline, and if it's funny then I go back and read the joke.

Should I seek help? :?

In that case, I'll make it easier for you...

"Well, first I had to know how fast you were walking, no?"

;D

IZ.
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James Blast
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... marzipan!
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
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6FeetOver
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I saw it coming. Then again, I *am* Ms. Spock. It was the logical way for it to end, see... ;) :von:
I left my heart in Ballycastle... :cry: :cry: :cry:
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markfiend
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"I thought you said 'King Kong's balls'!"
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
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Izzy HaveMercy
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"Nope sir," the pianoman said, "but if you can hum it, I can play it"! ;D

IZ.
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Pat
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"I'm not a real welder ,mister"
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Pista
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You need to put a new candle in.
Cheers.
Steve
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smiscandlon
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"The Aristocrats!" :lol:
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markfiend
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smiscandlon wrote:"The Aristocrats!" :lol:
You win ;D
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
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6FeetOver
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You forgot to mention the broken glass...
I left my heart in Ballycastle... :cry: :cry: :cry:
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eotunun
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Is that the non-navigative edition of Mornington Cresent?
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Tidal
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oh noes, there we go again... :!:
It's good to be back
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James Blast
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Kensington High Street ~ using Mortimer's Conversion, of course
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
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eotunun
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Morningto Cresent! (Yupp, I'm planning to go for a zero-sum round! ;D)
"These are my principles! And if you don't like the just says so, I have others, too!"
~Rufus T. Firefly
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bushman*pm
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....so what, you're Welsh and fcuk sheep!
LAND ROVER: THE BEAST FOUR BY FOUR BY FEAR! KICKS THE ARSE OFF RICEBURNERS!
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Tidal
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eotunun wrote:Morningto Cresent! (Yupp, I'm planning to go for a zero-sum round! ;D)
That still isn't Mornington Crescent though...dunno where Morningto Cresent is
It's good to be back
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6FeetOver
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Now, now, Tidal... :P :roll:
I left my heart in Ballycastle... :cry: :cry: :cry:
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Pista
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To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!"

:lol: :lol:
Cheers.
Steve
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TheCureCommunity
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eotunun
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Tidal wrote:
eotunun wrote:Morningto Cresent! (Yupp, I'm planning to go for a zero-sum round! ;D)
That still isn't Mornington Crescent though...dunno where Morningto Cresent is
Okay, Lord Trainspotter. You got me there.. :roll:

Now, where are you? What tactic are you going to play?
:P ;D
"These are my principles! And if you don't like the just says so, I have others, too!"
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James Blast
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new thread...? :innocent:

Glasgow Central (low level) invoking Portnoy's Complaint, naturally :)

RTTFD (returning to the first derail)
... the Six Patels :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
"And when you start to think about death, you start to think about what's after it. And then you start hoping there is a God. For me, it's a frightening thought to go nowhere".
~ Peter Steele
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