joke of the day 30/10/07

NEW RULES: One thread per day only. If there's a thread for today already started, post on that. And if there isn't? Then you get to start one. Aren't you the lucky one?
Post Reply
User avatar
HisWimmNess
Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 165
Joined: 07 Jul 2002, 01:00
Location: belgium
Contact:

Maybe (probably a repost) but still loving it:

the bootifull English language


In a Bangkok temple:
"IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN."

Cocktail lounge, Norway:
"LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR."

Doctor's office, Rome:
"SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES."

Dry cleaners, Bangkok:
"DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS"

In a Nairobi restaurant:
"CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER"

On an Athi River highway: this is the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi.
"TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE"

On a poster at Kencom:
"ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP"

In a City restaurant:
> "OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS"

In a cemetery:
"PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES."

Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
"GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED"

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
"OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR."

In a Tokyo bar:
"SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS"

Hotel, Yugoslavia:
"THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID."

Hotel, Japan:
"YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID."

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
"YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY."

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
"IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE"

Hotel, Zurich:
"BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE."

Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
"WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?"

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
"WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS."

A laundry in Rome:
"LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.
nostalgy ain't what it used to be
User avatar
Tidal
Gonzoid Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 442
Joined: 06 Mar 2007, 11:50
Location: The Hollow Land

Long time since I had a good laugh about the JotD- :lol: :lol: :lol:
It's good to be back
User avatar
stefan moermans
Slight Overbomber
Posts: 1042
Joined: 04 Jul 2006, 22:36
Location: rotselaar, belgium

iese de wim
in the land of the living.
MUSICA È
User avatar
silentNate
Utterly Bastard Groovy Amphetamine Filth
Posts: 824
Joined: 11 Jul 2007, 07:48
Location: Stars Hollow

Hotel, Japan:
"YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID."

:lol:
I had a face on the mirror
I had a hand on the gun
I had a place in the sun and a ticket to Syria
User avatar
Planet Dave
Underneath the Rock
Posts: 6746
Joined: 22 Apr 2003, 23:51
Location: Where the streets fold round

Brilliant :lol: :lol: :lol: :notworthy: all of them!
'What a heavy load Einstein must have had. Morons everywhere.'
Bartek
Underneath the Rock
Posts: 6141
Joined: 17 Sep 2005, 10:47

Planet Dave wrote:Brilliant :lol: :lol: :lol: :notworthy: all of them!
seconded :lol: :notworthy:
Post Reply