GW5 - Deadline Friday 17th September 18.30 PM

Does exactly what it says on the tin. Some of the nonsense contained herein may be very loosely related to The Sisters of Mercy, but I wouldn't bet your PayPal account on it. In keeping with the internet's general theme nothing written here should be taken as Gospel: over three quarters of it is utter gibberish, and most of the forum's denizens haven't spoken to another human being face-to-face for decades. Don't worry your pretty little heads about it. Above all else, remember this: You don't have to stay forever. I will understand.
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emilystrange
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Howdy! Still basking in a post-Sisters glow - football was somewhat put aside for that, which was just as well as bothe my teams lost. Bah. I have a foot injury which the nurse said could be a sprain or potentially gout or arthritis :eek: Only I could got to a gig with nearly 3k other people and come home with gout instead of Covid. :roll: :von: :wake:

Anyway, shall we move on? Plenty of good games to enjoy coming up - starting TOMORROW. I think the Brazilian isolation players are available again, do check.
Also, please note that the new minister for Culture and Sport is Nadine Dorries, who says she's a Liverpool fan but is in fact a complete and utter **********.

Fixtures!

Friday 17 September 2021

Newcastle 20:00 Leeds Steve Bruce might be the the first to go this season? Will be watching this one
UK - Sky Sports

Saturday 18 September 2021

Wolves 12:30 Brentford This one will be more like a chess game, unless one of them comes out as their avatar animal
UK - BT Sport
Burnley 15:00 Arsenal Go Burnley! Arsenal are playing tooth and nail for Arteta's future - aren't they?
Liverpool 15:00 Crystal Palace Palace may be looking back at last week's win with misty eyes, Liverpool just steamrollering on
Man City 15:00 Southampton City have been undone once already, but can the Saints do that away? City have already got 6 this week, might be bored of scoring?
Norwich 15:00 Watford Norwich need to throw all of their new signings on and go for it. Watford just need to lose.
Aston Villa 17:30 Everton Maybe this one will be quite exciting. Everton were good the other night.
UK - Sky Sports

Sunday 19 September 2021

Brighton 14:00 Leicester Are Leicester faltering a bit? They still have to start against Napoli tonight as I type, so injuries may play a part
West Ham 14:00 Man Utd Ronaldo to win, everyone else to stand about and watch
UK - Sky Sports
Spurs 16:30 Chelsea Def on the sofa for this one. Chelsea looking like real contenders, Spurs having a bit of a rebirth atm
UK - Sky Sports

Teams to check, transfers to consider, hope to muster and sweet victory to anticipate. Not you, Palace. :lol: *runs*
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Pista
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Mmm.
Looking at my predictions this week....
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Should I?
:innocent:
Cheers.
Steve
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Planet Dave
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Every chance! Erm.

One wildcard and a measly 50-odd points later I'm at a loss for my squad. Never mind Steve Bruce, odds are on myself as the first managerial casualty of the season.
'What a heavy load Einstein must have had. Morons everywhere.'
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emilystrange
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You're staying right where you are, young man.
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emilystrange
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I've just noticed that I can'r spell September
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Planet Dave
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emilystrange wrote: 17 Sep 2021, 20:16 I've just noticed that I can'r spell September
:lol: whereas I had not, seemed legit. Funny old things, eyes. Can't help but notice you can't spell can't, mind. ;D :innocent:

Already sacked myself, and drafted myself in as caretaker-manager til I get reappointed. Or summat. Still got too many city in my team, but they're always likely to have a decent chance of winning 10 nil.
'What a heavy load Einstein must have had. Morons everywhere.'
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emilystrange
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at least none of us can go into administration like Derby
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I should be on my first dammit but Jota elected to put the ball into row z from 7 yards out.
A consolation dammit as he's on my FPL team
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Steve
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emilystrange
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s'ok, there were more dammits
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All the PL coaches seem to be looking at my FPL team this week & not picking my players.
Kepa starts for Chel$ea after I put Mendy in net. :evil:
Cheers.
Steve
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markfiend
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Only eleven of my squad even played this week. I spawned 75 points though so an ill wind...
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
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Planet Dave
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My lot all played and mustered 50 odd again. Sacked in the morning, I'm getting sacked in the morning, *checks time*, oh. On the plus side, a countryful of ABUs all sat in their boiling p1ss yesterday teatime :twisted: and on the plus plus side, there's a veritable menagerie of little birds (blue tits, coal tits) flapping around at the feeder in the morning sunshine :D I'll get them to pick next week's squad ;D
'What a heavy load Einstein must have had. Morons everywhere.'
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emilystrange
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Right, here we are with the news and sport. GW5 was a bit interesting... I did end up getting it mixed up with the carimehome cup at times, but it was one of those weeks chez Strange

Newcastle 1-1 Leeds Raphinha scored once but with 5 chances and 3 possible assists, Leeds having 17 good chances overall. Saint-Maximin's run and shot was quite a beauty. I missed seeing it, but 15 saves between the two goalies must have made it quite the highlights reel.
Wolves 0-2 Brentford Jiminez, Traore and Hwang all trying hard for Wolves, Traore giving the post summat to cry about, but to no avail. Wolves generally poor and not getting any better. Brentford's Toney converted his penalty and had another ruled out. Even with 10 men, Brentford dominated.
Burnley 0-1 Arsenal Arsenal starting to climb out of the doompit with Arteta wiping his brow in relief. They took all of the bonus points. Could have been different if VAR had upheld the penalty award.
Liverpool 3-0 Crystal Palace The usual suspects scoring for owners and club, except for Jota missing a sitter. Guaita made 7 saves, which is not bad against the Reds. Palace a bit unlucky not to score as there were chances.
Man City 0-0 Southampton Disappointing for City though defence still solid. Southampton will be the happier, City aren't gettign into the Champions groove quite yet.
Norwich 1-3 Watford Glory be, Norwich. 1-1 at half time, then Sarr arrived with 2 to sink the rescue boat. The second was reinstated by VAR after an offside call. Norwich were very lively with the new signings pitching in, but can't finish.
Aston Villa 3-0 Everton Own goal! Digne helped Villa/Bailrey out with their second after Matty Cash had started it off, and Bailey scored one with his own name on a few minutes later. Subbed on, he picked up an injury later, but not before making the game his.
Brighton 2-1 Leicester Welbeck instrumental in claiming the 3 points, but Vardy got back on track on his 250th appearance. VAR intervened to give Maupay the pen to convert, again to rule out Lookman's effort for Barnes being offside and yet again for Ndidi's for the same reason. Lots of shots and incidents.
West Ham 1-2 Man Utd Ronaldo scores (i might have that on autopaste) and Lingard curled a cracker in during the last minute, but WH had scored in the first half following a deflection that no one could do much about. BIG DRAMA in injury time when VAR gave a handball against Shaw. Noble was subbed on just to take the penalty, which was saved. United were denied two penalty shouts involving Ronaldo.
Spurs 0-3 Chelsea Even more glory be, Spurs. Loris made a good few saves and Spurs had chances, but Chelsea outclassed them in the second half. Was their orange juice really juice? Chelsea now on my list for champions, as they are really powering ahead - Tuchel has refined and redefined them. They just need to do it against someone else's team.

Heads up for the future - Kaide Gordon and Conor Bradley of Liverpool. Both teenagers played a big part in the Cup win on Tuesday. Gordon especially - he shone very brightly for a 16 year old.

The results for us armchair experts are as follows:

In the main league, BB&S continue to win GWs and top the league. All early days yet.

Image

Dead Men Walking are joyfully wearing a stillquiteclean Yellow Jersey
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and the Big Shout Out goes to Oliver's army with 81.
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Over in the h2h, the league leaders are the same, but IGM go bottom.

Image

with the Crown resting on the bonce of Dynamo Salah.


Handing you over to Steve now, but before that, would just like to take a moment to remember the genius of Jimmy Greaves. RIP, and thank you.
Last edited by emilystrange on 25 Sep 2021, 20:10, edited 1 time in total.
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Have to wait impatiently now for the biggest derby in world football on Monday evening
Cheers.
Steve
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