Heartland

Or even

Adversely affected his chances

There was a young man called Richey
Who wooed a young lady called SG
He wasn't a goth
But they still hit it off
Their both being sarky and bitchy
Boom boom



There was a young man called Dark
Who preferred not to play in the park
...

Francis wrote:Or even

Adversely affected his chances

There was a young man called Richey
Who wooed a young lady called SG
He wasn't a goth
But they still hit it off
Their both being sarky and bitchy
Boom boom



There was a young man called Dark
Who preferred not to play in the park
...

I fear this one.

There was a young man called Dark
Who preferred not to play in the park
So instead he played with his c**k
...

but his mates got a shock
when he did it at school for a lark.

There was a young lady called Claire...

I figured nothing rhymes with Boudicca (if you pronounce it properly, i.e BO- DI - SEE -YA), but god knows my real name provides endless rhyming opportunities.

Do yer worst.

...who's butt kept on pushing out air....

There was a young lady called Claire
Who's butt kept on pushing out air
She went out one night
But her date got a fright
And left her alone at the fair.

hallucienate wrote:There was a young lady called Claire
Who's butt kept on pushing out air
She went out one night
But her date got a fright
And left her alone at the fair.

It certainly starts out promisingly obscene... can we make it filthy all the way through?

Come on people, I know you've got it in you!

boudicca wrote:I figured nothing rhymes with Boudicca (if you pronounce it properly, i.e BO- DI - SEE -YA)Do yer worst.

There once was a lass called Boudicca,
who sat naked beside a forsythia
Along came rock star Izzy,
he said "I wanna get busy!
With such beautiful gal, I beseech 'ya!"

ARF!



IZ. Belgian dude.

Barry's hair was most quiffy..

Izzy HaveMercy wrote:
There once was a lass called Boudicca,
who sat naked beside a forsythia
Along came rock star Izzy,
he said "I wanna get busy!
With such beautiful gal, I beseech 'ya!"

You sure know how to woo a lady with poetry, Iz!
I'm all yours, you Flanders love-god you!

There once was a lad from Pitlochry
Who was shagging his bird in a rockery...

boudicca wrote:

Izzy HaveMercy wrote:
There once was a lass called Boudicca,
who sat naked beside a forsythia
Along came rock star Izzy,
he said "I wanna get busy!
With such beautiful gal, I beseech 'ya!"

You sure know how to woo a lady with poetry, Iz!
I'm all yours, you Flanders love-god you!

I'm already taken, O Ye Most excellent Flower of Britain

But I will temporarily set aside all morals for a little bit of first-class woo-ance!

Yes, dear...coming.....

IZ.

boudicca wrote:

hallucienate wrote:There was a young lady called Claire
Who's butt kept on pushing out air
She went out one night
But her date got a fright
And left her alone at the fair.

It certainly starts out promisingly obscene... can we make it filthy all the way through?

Come on people, I know you've got it in you!

There was a young lady called Claire
who liked to take it up the arse for a fare
well she squealed like a pig
she loved a good frig
till oneday it got stuck
the .... became a suck
and she ended up with a dirty sanchez right there

Dark wrote:Barry's hair was most quiffy..

nowt shocking, just a bit iffy

James Blast wrote:

Dark wrote:Barry's hair was most quiffy..

nowt shocking, just a bit iffy

From baby-oil showers


Come on, the ending is left nice and open for the obvious rhymes

Dark wrote:

James Blast wrote:

Dark wrote:Barry's hair was most quiffy..

nowt shocking, just a bit iffy

From baby-oil showers


Come on, the ending is left nice and open for the obvious rhymes

rose petals and flowers

his quiff is erect in a jiffy!

paint it black wrote:There was a young lady called Claire
who liked to take it up the arse for a fare
well she squealed like a pig
she loved a good frig
till oneday it got stuck
the .... became a suck
and she ended up with a dirty sanchez right there

This is the stuff!

Now:

There was once a w0lf named d00my..

and

Shadow_Smile had lost his socks..


Have fun

There was a young lady called Claire
Who had a mohican 'down there'
But she wasn't impressed
When she later undressed
And found holes in her best underwear

Dark wrote:Shadow_Smile had lost his socks..

Oh, it made people flee in flocks
They just couldn't stand the smell
</inspiration>

VG Francis. 9/10.