Heartland

Back at the Batcave, I'm about to do the register, so if you could all sit with your legs crossed, lips closed and hands in your laps, we can start. Looking at me and listening, please... STEVE! MAV! Do I need to move you away from each other?

Steve's work from last week is now up on the wall, so you can all look at it whenever you like. Maybe we could give it a special mention in our school Celebration Assembly?

As it's the end of the week, it's time for our usual homework.
Your Learning Objective is: Can we predict which Premiership football players will score more points than the others?
I do expect you to put a lot of thought into it this weekend. There are some new players that you could use to help you find the answers. Here are the games you need to work out:

Saturday 3rd February

Burnley 12:30 Man City
Bournemouth 15:00 Stoke
Brighton 15:00 West Ham
Leicester 15:00 Swansea
Man Utd 15:00 Huddersfield
West Brom 15:00 Southampton
Arsenal 17:30 Everton

Sunday 04 February

Crystal Palace 14:15 Newcastle
Liverpool 16:30 Spurs

Monday 05 February

Watford 20:00 Chelsea

Final marks will be awarded on Monday evening, so make sure you hand this in on time. Late submissions can't be altered, as you know.

If you are going to make fun of Jose, please do it in private. He's a delicate flower according to his mum. If you meet one of our new boys, play nicely and help them settle in. At least for a week.

I'll be in the staff room with coffee on a drip.

emilystrange wrote: STEVE! MAV! Do I need to move you away from each other?

No Miss

emilystrange wrote:
If you are going to make fun of Jose, please do it in private. He's a delicate flower according to his mum.

Pista wrote:

emilystrange wrote: STEVE! MAV! Do I need to move you away from each other?

No Miss

Yes please. He's been overdoing the Lynx Africa again

Mav787 wrote:

Pista wrote:

emilystrange wrote: STEVE! MAV! Do I need to move you away from each other?

No Miss

Yes please. He's been overdoing the Lynx Africa again

It's like I never came home from school!

emilystrange wrote:It's like I never came home from school!

Speaking of which, Mahrez bunked off again today.

aye, i heard. at least he's not whacking the other kids with big sticks

emilystrange wrote:aye, i heard. at least he's not whacking the other kids with big sticks

He's having a fag behind the bike sheds with Julie.

Dear Antonio.

Remember me?
That guy who you hardly ever gave a game to unless you were desperate?
Yeah, well just letting you know how I'm getting on at Dortmund

Love & hugs

Bats xoxo

Aubrey Meringue starts for Arsenal.
Anyone pick him this week?

Aaron Ramsey has 2 already.
Expect someone famous to die overnight.
This is his family crest apparently

Arse's new boys doing well, and we've not had an hour yet

Dammit Palace!

equal terms now, lad.

emilystrange wrote:equal terms now, lad.

Phew!
Best update my calendar.

Salad puts the reds ahead

right. this needs goals from Virgil, Kane, Dier and more from Salad. my clean sheet bit will have to take a bit, but if only those people score a few i'm happy.

and spurs to win, obv

Absolute peach of a gif on twitter

oh, bum

Unbelievable match, but neither of those penalty calls were right.
Karius never even touched (the offside) Kane & van Dijk never touched Lamela.
That linesman will need an armed escort out of the city tonight

I read this today

Manchester United manager Jose Mourinho again criticised the atmosphere at Old Trafford, saying it was 'quiet' during Saturday's game and 'not like Portsmouth' - where he enjoys the atmosphere.

This is despite a singing section being installed, which supporters are adamant has made a difference.

However, it has been revealed further discussions have taken place between fans and directors about improving the atmosphere at games.

What? A singing section?

f**k it!
No Alonso tonight

conte in BIG trouble now