Andrew Eldritch
- robertzombie
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He seemed nice and normal when I met him
- EvilBastard
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Andrew Eldritch is actually several people. After the success of "manufactured" bands like Sigue Sigue Sputnik, Warner Brothers' marketing department decided to create the persona of Andrew Eldritch, back him with some of the more talented musicians from their stable, call them the Sisters of Mercy, and build the myth around him.
The myth was far more successful than they had imagined - The Sisters went viral inside 14 months, and "fans" (opinion formers) like Quiffboy were recruited to push the band into record stores and clubs.
Warner Bros has a group of short people with different haircuts and a wide variety of eyewear to play the role of Eldritch, and it's unlikely that you've ever seen the same person on stage twice.
The conspiracy goes far deeper than you'd think - none of the bands that "signed" to Merciful Release ever existed, the sponsorship of St Pauli FC was a marketing wheeze, and FatPat was the slightly chubby daughter of the head of East West Records who couldn't find a boyfriend. In return for boinking her for a while the then-incarnation of Eldritch was given 2 weeks holiday in Jordan, after which WB took his holiday videos and projected them on the greenscreen to make the video for Dominion. The woman who appears in the video is one Blodwyn Evans, of 14, Sheepbotherer Terrace in Brecon - she was "discovered" after her book, "Backcombing for fun & profit" was profiled in Just 17 magazine. She had just the look that WB was looking for, so they filmed some footage and edited her in later. Blodwyn later disappeared in mysterious circumstances - "rumour" has it that she has in her possession a listenable copy of SSV, but given the lengths that WB has gone to to protect The Sisters conspiracy this should not be taken as fact.
I would reveal the identity of the person who is currently masquerading as Eldritch, but I've probably said too much already. I have to post here under a pseudonym to protect myself and my sources - Warner's ability to punish people who expose their secrets makes the Freemasons' look like a Sunday School picnic. I have only chosen to come clean now because I believe that you deserve to know the truth.
The myth was far more successful than they had imagined - The Sisters went viral inside 14 months, and "fans" (opinion formers) like Quiffboy were recruited to push the band into record stores and clubs.
Warner Bros has a group of short people with different haircuts and a wide variety of eyewear to play the role of Eldritch, and it's unlikely that you've ever seen the same person on stage twice.
The conspiracy goes far deeper than you'd think - none of the bands that "signed" to Merciful Release ever existed, the sponsorship of St Pauli FC was a marketing wheeze, and FatPat was the slightly chubby daughter of the head of East West Records who couldn't find a boyfriend. In return for boinking her for a while the then-incarnation of Eldritch was given 2 weeks holiday in Jordan, after which WB took his holiday videos and projected them on the greenscreen to make the video for Dominion. The woman who appears in the video is one Blodwyn Evans, of 14, Sheepbotherer Terrace in Brecon - she was "discovered" after her book, "Backcombing for fun & profit" was profiled in Just 17 magazine. She had just the look that WB was looking for, so they filmed some footage and edited her in later. Blodwyn later disappeared in mysterious circumstances - "rumour" has it that she has in her possession a listenable copy of SSV, but given the lengths that WB has gone to to protect The Sisters conspiracy this should not be taken as fact.
I would reveal the identity of the person who is currently masquerading as Eldritch, but I've probably said too much already. I have to post here under a pseudonym to protect myself and my sources - Warner's ability to punish people who expose their secrets makes the Freemasons' look like a Sunday School picnic. I have only chosen to come clean now because I believe that you deserve to know the truth.
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
Hank Moody
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EvilBastard wrote:Andrew Eldritch is actually several people. After the success of "manufactured" bands like Sigue Sigue Sputnik, Warner Brothers' marketing department decided to create the persona of Andrew Eldritch, back him with some of the more talented musicians from their stable, call them the Sisters of Mercy, and build the myth around him.
The myth was far more successful than they had imagined - The Sisters went viral inside 14 months, and "fans" (opinion formers) like Quiffboy were recruited to push the band into record stores and clubs.
Warner Bros has a group of short people with different haircuts and a wide variety of eyewear to play the role of Eldritch, and it's unlikely that you've ever seen the same person on stage twice.
The conspiracy goes far deeper than you'd think - none of the bands that "signed" to Merciful Release ever existed, the sponsorship of St Pauli FC was a marketing wheeze, and FatPat was the slightly chubby daughter of the head of East West Records who couldn't find a boyfriend. In return for boinking her for a while the then-incarnation of Eldritch was given 2 weeks holiday in Jordan, after which WB took his holiday videos and projected them on the greenscreen to make the video for Dominion. The woman who appears in the video is one Blodwyn Evans, of 14, Sheepbotherer Terrace in Brecon - she was "discovered" after her book, "Backcombing for fun & profit" was profiled in Just 17 magazine. She had just the look that WB was looking for, so they filmed some footage and edited her in later. Blodwyn later disappeared in mysterious circumstances - "rumour" has it that she has in her possession a listenable copy of SSV, but given the lengths that WB has gone to to protect The Sisters conspiracy this should not be taken as fact.
I would reveal the identity of the person who is currently masquerading as Eldritch, but I've probably said too much already. I have to post here under a pseudonym to protect myself and my sources - Warner's ability to punish people who expose their secrets makes the Freemasons' look like a Sunday School picnic. I have only chosen to come clean now because I believe that you deserve to know the truth.
I don't necessarily agree with everything I think.
That ought to teach you not to ask questions around here. Welcome to the loony bin.
I have met him several times myself and I would say it depends on the day as to what he is like.
He has always been well spoken when he chooses to speak, and very witty.
I have met him several times myself and I would say it depends on the day as to what he is like.
He has always been well spoken when he chooses to speak, and very witty.
I am NOT in the cool club
I met him at the ASDA in Pudsey in 2001. He had a 4 pack of ASDA Smartprice toilet paper in his shopping basket (along with a bottle of Absolute vodka and a carton of Ocean Spray cranberry juice).
"Rock Star" my arse!
He uses the cheapest toilet paper like eveyone else!
"Rock Star" my arse!
He uses the cheapest toilet paper like eveyone else!
- EvilBastard
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I rest my case - clearly you've met different people on each occassion.Rise891 wrote:I have met him several times myself and I would say it depends on the day as to what he is like.
"I won't go down in history, but I probably will go down on your sister."
Hank Moody
Hank Moody
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zoiks! i've been rumbledEvilBastard wrote:Andrew Eldritch is actually several people. After the success of "manufactured" bands like Sigue Sigue Sputnik, Warner Brothers' marketing department decided to create the persona of Andrew Eldritch, back him with some of the more talented musicians from their stable, call them the Sisters of Mercy, and build the myth around him.
The myth was far more successful than they had imagined - The Sisters went viral inside 14 months, and "fans" (opinion formers) like Quiffboy were recruited to push the band into record stores and clubs.
Warner Bros has a group of short people with different haircuts and a wide variety of eyewear to play the role of Eldritch, and it's unlikely that you've ever seen the same person on stage twice.
The conspiracy goes far deeper than you'd think - none of the bands that "signed" to Merciful Release ever existed, the sponsorship of St Pauli FC was a marketing wheeze, and FatPat was the slightly chubby daughter of the head of East West Records who couldn't find a boyfriend. In return for boinking her for a while the then-incarnation of Eldritch was given 2 weeks holiday in Jordan, after which WB took his holiday videos and projected them on the greenscreen to make the video for Dominion. The woman who appears in the video is one Blodwyn Evans, of 14, Sheepbotherer Terrace in Brecon - she was "discovered" after her book, "Backcombing for fun & profit" was profiled in Just 17 magazine. She had just the look that WB was looking for, so they filmed some footage and edited her in later. Blodwyn later disappeared in mysterious circumstances - "rumour" has it that she has in her possession a listenable copy of SSV, but given the lengths that WB has gone to to protect The Sisters conspiracy this should not be taken as fact.
I would reveal the identity of the person who is currently masquerading as Eldritch, but I've probably said too much already. I have to post here under a pseudonym to protect myself and my sources - Warner's ability to punish people who expose their secrets makes the Freemasons' look like a Sunday School picnic. I have only chosen to come clean now because I believe that you deserve to know the truth.
What’s the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
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welcomefullom wrote:Anybody on here know him personally or related to him ? If so what is he like in real life ?
as far as we know, no one on here is related to him, but several people on here have met him numerous times. some of them even consider him a friend.
as far as what he's like, i'd say he was like any other bloke that has spent the best part of his life in the music business, being hounded by geeky guys and insanely obsessive goth chicks
ie: nice enough on a good day, slightly grumpy on a bad day, and ever slightly paranoid the rest of the time.
What’s the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
- weebleswobble
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ribbons69 wrote:I am Andrew Eldritch,and so is my wife.
I'm Eldritch!
‎"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
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i've just remembered,we did actually have the singer from devon-crusty-punks 'the bus station loonies' sign up for heartland once, a long time ago now. iirc, he claims to have dated eldritch's sister (?) in the very early 80s (before anyone really know who he was)Quiff Boy wrote:as far as we know, no one on here is related to him
What’s the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
EvilBastard wrote:Andrew Eldritch is actually several people. After the success of "manufactured" bands like Sigue Sigue Sputnik, Warner Brothers' marketing department decided to create the persona of Andrew Eldritch, back him with some of the more talented musicians from their stable, call them the Sisters of Mercy, and build the myth around him.
The myth was far more successful than they had imagined - The Sisters went viral inside 14 months, and "fans" (opinion formers) like Quiffboy were recruited to push the band into record stores and clubs.
Warner Bros has a group of short people with different haircuts and a wide variety of eyewear to play the role of Eldritch, and it's unlikely that you've ever seen the same person on stage twice.
The conspiracy goes far deeper than you'd think - none of the bands that "signed" to Merciful Release ever existed, the sponsorship of St Pauli FC was a marketing wheeze, and FatPat was the slightly chubby daughter of the head of East West Records who couldn't find a boyfriend. In return for boinking her for a while the then-incarnation of Eldritch was given 2 weeks holiday in Jordan, after which WB took his holiday videos and projected them on the greenscreen to make the video for Dominion. The woman who appears in the video is one Blodwyn Evans, of 14, Sheepbotherer Terrace in Brecon - she was "discovered" after her book, "Backcombing for fun & profit" was profiled in Just 17 magazine. She had just the look that WB was looking for, so they filmed some footage and edited her in later. Blodwyn later disappeared in mysterious circumstances - "rumour" has it that she has in her possession a listenable copy of SSV, but given the lengths that WB has gone to to protect The Sisters conspiracy this should not be taken as fact.
I would reveal the identity of the person who is currently masquerading as Eldritch, but I've probably said too much already. I have to post here under a pseudonym to protect myself and my sources - Warner's ability to punish people who expose their secrets makes the Freemasons' look like a Sunday School picnic. I have only chosen to come clean now because I believe that you deserve to know the truth.
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no, but i think we all know who it is_emma_ wrote:Before anyone asks, that's not me, I'm not goth and I don't hound.Quiff Boy wrote:hounded by geeky guys and insanely obsessive goth chicks
What’s the difference between a buffalo and a bison?
- damagedone
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Perfect read while drinking my coffee
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Is it just me who feels a bit sorry for fullom now?
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
—Bertrand Russell
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Yes. Just you.markfiend wrote:Is it just me who feels a bit sorry for fullom now?
We forgive as we forget
As the day is long.
As the day is long.
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Quiff Boy wrote:weeeeeeeeeell......... you're bald enough, but you're at least 3ft too tall
‎"We will wear some very loud shirts. We will wear some very wrong trousers."
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OKHom_Corleone wrote:Yes. Just you.markfiend wrote:Is it just me who feels a bit sorry for fullom now?
The fundamental cause of the trouble is that in the modern world the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt.
—Bertrand Russell
—Bertrand Russell
EvilBastard wrote:Andrew Eldritch is actually several people. After the success of "manufactured" bands like Sigue Sigue Sputnik, Warner Brothers' marketing department decided to create the persona of Andrew Eldritch, back him with some of the more talented musicians from their stable, call them the Sisters of Mercy, and build the myth around him.
The myth was far more successful than they had imagined - The Sisters went viral inside 14 months, and "fans" (opinion formers) like Quiffboy were recruited to push the band into record stores and clubs.
Warner Bros has a group of short people with different haircuts and a wide variety of eyewear to play the role of Eldritch, and it's unlikely that you've ever seen the same person on stage twice.
The conspiracy goes far deeper than you'd think - none of the bands that "signed" to Merciful Release ever existed, the sponsorship of St Pauli FC was a marketing wheeze, and FatPat was the slightly chubby daughter of the head of East West Records who couldn't find a boyfriend. In return for boinking her for a while the then-incarnation of Eldritch was given 2 weeks holiday in Jordan, after which WB took his holiday videos and projected them on the greenscreen to make the video for Dominion. The woman who appears in the video is one Blodwyn Evans, of 14, Sheepbotherer Terrace in Brecon - she was "discovered" after her book, "Backcombing for fun & profit" was profiled in Just 17 magazine. She had just the look that WB was looking for, so they filmed some footage and edited her in later. Blodwyn later disappeared in mysterious circumstances - "rumour" has it that she has in her possession a listenable copy of SSV, but given the lengths that WB has gone to to protect The Sisters conspiracy this should not be taken as fact.
I would reveal the identity of the person who is currently masquerading as Eldritch, but I've probably said too much already. I have to post here under a pseudonym to protect myself and my sources - Warner's ability to punish people who expose their secrets makes the Freemasons' look like a Sunday School picnic. I have only chosen to come clean now because I believe that you deserve to know the truth.
You killed me here!
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